NarcoTerrorist
Greenlighter
I suffer from severe chronic pain as a result of a rare genetic disorder which results in severe pain, chronic infections, and ultimately death due to infection and various malignancies, mostly leukemia/lymphoma. I suffered a pretty severe motorcycle accident 2 years ago, due to a minor stroke. I ended up losing consciousness and consequently the bike veered to the left into a high sidewalk. The person who found me, said my motorcycle literally hit the sidewalk and came to a dead stop in a fraction of a second, and she saw me, fly about 15 meters through the air. Anyways, to make a long story short, I suffered multiple broken/fractures bones, and my skin was literally ripped open in a few places. It was quite painful and I was hospitalized for 4 months, where I ended up suffering multiple pulmonary embolisms, which resulted in even more pain. I stopped eating, and lost 1/2 of my body weight. I was 315 lbs when I was hospitalized, and when I was released I was 220lbs. This happened because the pain was so severe and I was so uncomfortable I did not eat, I only drank juice/ginger ale, and the odd "Ensure" protein drink. I was not able to get my pain under control in the hospital even with the help of the palliative care doctor. My Methadone was increased to 110mg three times daily and 16mg hydromorphone IM every 4-6 hours which was not enough. What helped the most was extremely high doses of Lorazepam (16-20mg daily). It helped me "forget" I was suffering. I couldn't even remember that someone had come to visit me the day before. It was my savior at the time. I eventually got out and got home. I still was not mobile, and needed help to get to the bathroom, to use the toilet or shower. It took me about 5 minutes to make it 10 ft to the bathroom, because I was in such pain. I ended up collapsing while trying to get into the shower due to the pain. It was just too much. I felt like killing myself.
My chronic pain doctor is a great guy. He's known me since I was a baby. He ended up trying all sorts of stuff. Even drugs that no one else would prescribe. I couldn't smoke marijuana (my lungs were severely damaged from blood clots) so he prescribed me Nabilone (Cesamet) 6mg daily. Nabilone is a synthetic analogue of THC. It's like Marinol but much more potent, and has much more profound effects. The feeling was identical to eating a massive amount of hashish or high grade cannabis, with a very psychedelic, and heavy stone which lasted 18-20 hours. I was baked all day, everyday. It provided a lot of relief, but eventually I couldn't handle being so high all the time. I felt like I wasn't in control of myself and would be very slow to respond to anything, and was having mild hallucinations.
I was in so much pain I actually couldn't even go to see the doctor. I had to speak to him on the phone, and in e-mails to get medications and let him know what was going on with my care etc. He prescribed me Tramadol, it didn't work. Later on there was something called Tapentadol which is like Tramadol. It's somewhere between the strength of Morphine and Tramadol. It was about as good as Oxycodone in for relief but not nearly enough.
Finally I was so fed up I told him I was feeling like throwing in the towel, kicking the bucket, killing myself and that if I couldn't relieve this pain I was done. He sent me an e-mail telling me he would try something he rarely prescribed and to go to my pharmacy later on in the day that he would arrange this treatment for me.
I went to the pharmacy and the pharmacist handed me 5 little boxes, syringes/needles, and 1 bottle of Flurazepam 30mg capsules. He explained I was to take 100mg of Ketamine, IM up to 2 times during the day, and 1 time at night, as long as 2 hours had passed between the last injection and to take a 30mg Flurazepam twice daily (before the first dose, I was instructed to take it 45 minutes before). I was completely blown away that a pharmacist was handing me these 100mg/ml strength 10ml vials of Ketamine.
I went home and was kind of afraid of using this stuff because of all of the rumours and myths I had heard as a teen. People called it "cat tranquilizer", "horse tranquilizer" and that it was some sort of dirty street drug. I was unsure of using this but I had no choice, the pain was too severe, I had to use it.
I took the 30mg Flurazepam, and within 30 minutes I was feeling slightly relaxed, and pulled 1ml of ketamine into a syringe and injected it into my buttocks.
A feeling of calmness came over me. My pain literally disappeared. I could have cut my arm off and not felt it. I had no feeling in my body at all, I was just so relieved and it was the best painkiller I had ever used. It didn't act on my body anything like an opioid/opiate. Morphine, Hydromorphone, Fentanyl, Methadone, all just dull the pain, they don't rid you of it.
I didn't have many psychedelic effects, except for feeling very detached from my body. I felt like my body was separated from my mind and thoughts. It was a life saver. I was very numb. It felt like I was slipping away, but it was pleasant. I was moderately anesthetized. I found out after the reason for taking the Flurazepam was to prevent hallucinations and a "bad trip". I ended up taking this for approximately 1 year, and slowly tapered off of it, over a 3 months.
If you are suffering from pain so severe you feel like killing yourself or that you are bed ridden, and just rotting away and get no true moments of relief except when you get a moment of sleep, I suggest you talk to a chronic pain specialist about Ketamine. I don't know what effects this has long term. I don't know if it will cause problems physically, but it was worth the risk to me. My life was a living hell and unbearable until I tried Ketamine.
I highly suggest Ketamine when you have tried all narcotics, and other pain-lessening drugs with little success and only minor relief. There are risks and side effects, and everyone reacts differently to it. I am not a doctor and I'm not trying or meaning to promote the use of this even if it sounds like I am. I just had such profound relief that I can't help but speak highly of the experience I had with it.
Ketamine is a very strong drug which can be dangerous and should only be used when a physician prescribes it. It should be used exactly as the doctor says and you should never use more than prescribed. If you have an open minded and compassionate pain specialist and you're at the end of you rope, have a discussion with your chronic pain specialist about Ketamine.
Thanks you for taking the time to read this. I hope with all my heart someone in need of relief discusses Ketamine with their doctor and is helped. That would be great.
==NarcoTerrorist==
My chronic pain doctor is a great guy. He's known me since I was a baby. He ended up trying all sorts of stuff. Even drugs that no one else would prescribe. I couldn't smoke marijuana (my lungs were severely damaged from blood clots) so he prescribed me Nabilone (Cesamet) 6mg daily. Nabilone is a synthetic analogue of THC. It's like Marinol but much more potent, and has much more profound effects. The feeling was identical to eating a massive amount of hashish or high grade cannabis, with a very psychedelic, and heavy stone which lasted 18-20 hours. I was baked all day, everyday. It provided a lot of relief, but eventually I couldn't handle being so high all the time. I felt like I wasn't in control of myself and would be very slow to respond to anything, and was having mild hallucinations.
I was in so much pain I actually couldn't even go to see the doctor. I had to speak to him on the phone, and in e-mails to get medications and let him know what was going on with my care etc. He prescribed me Tramadol, it didn't work. Later on there was something called Tapentadol which is like Tramadol. It's somewhere between the strength of Morphine and Tramadol. It was about as good as Oxycodone in for relief but not nearly enough.
Finally I was so fed up I told him I was feeling like throwing in the towel, kicking the bucket, killing myself and that if I couldn't relieve this pain I was done. He sent me an e-mail telling me he would try something he rarely prescribed and to go to my pharmacy later on in the day that he would arrange this treatment for me.
I went to the pharmacy and the pharmacist handed me 5 little boxes, syringes/needles, and 1 bottle of Flurazepam 30mg capsules. He explained I was to take 100mg of Ketamine, IM up to 2 times during the day, and 1 time at night, as long as 2 hours had passed between the last injection and to take a 30mg Flurazepam twice daily (before the first dose, I was instructed to take it 45 minutes before). I was completely blown away that a pharmacist was handing me these 100mg/ml strength 10ml vials of Ketamine.
I went home and was kind of afraid of using this stuff because of all of the rumours and myths I had heard as a teen. People called it "cat tranquilizer", "horse tranquilizer" and that it was some sort of dirty street drug. I was unsure of using this but I had no choice, the pain was too severe, I had to use it.
I took the 30mg Flurazepam, and within 30 minutes I was feeling slightly relaxed, and pulled 1ml of ketamine into a syringe and injected it into my buttocks.
A feeling of calmness came over me. My pain literally disappeared. I could have cut my arm off and not felt it. I had no feeling in my body at all, I was just so relieved and it was the best painkiller I had ever used. It didn't act on my body anything like an opioid/opiate. Morphine, Hydromorphone, Fentanyl, Methadone, all just dull the pain, they don't rid you of it.
I didn't have many psychedelic effects, except for feeling very detached from my body. I felt like my body was separated from my mind and thoughts. It was a life saver. I was very numb. It felt like I was slipping away, but it was pleasant. I was moderately anesthetized. I found out after the reason for taking the Flurazepam was to prevent hallucinations and a "bad trip". I ended up taking this for approximately 1 year, and slowly tapered off of it, over a 3 months.
If you are suffering from pain so severe you feel like killing yourself or that you are bed ridden, and just rotting away and get no true moments of relief except when you get a moment of sleep, I suggest you talk to a chronic pain specialist about Ketamine. I don't know what effects this has long term. I don't know if it will cause problems physically, but it was worth the risk to me. My life was a living hell and unbearable until I tried Ketamine.
I highly suggest Ketamine when you have tried all narcotics, and other pain-lessening drugs with little success and only minor relief. There are risks and side effects, and everyone reacts differently to it. I am not a doctor and I'm not trying or meaning to promote the use of this even if it sounds like I am. I just had such profound relief that I can't help but speak highly of the experience I had with it.
Ketamine is a very strong drug which can be dangerous and should only be used when a physician prescribes it. It should be used exactly as the doctor says and you should never use more than prescribed. If you have an open minded and compassionate pain specialist and you're at the end of you rope, have a discussion with your chronic pain specialist about Ketamine.
Thanks you for taking the time to read this. I hope with all my heart someone in need of relief discusses Ketamine with their doctor and is helped. That would be great.
==NarcoTerrorist==