Xorkoth
Bluelight Crew
So the past two nights (yeah I know, twice in a row isn't a great idea) I had my first two preliminary experiences with ketamine, in order to familiarize myself with its buzz so that I might be somewhat prepared to enter the K-hole the next time I try it.
I had received 500mg of ketamine. So I divided it up by eye into two piles of 200mg and one of 100mg and put them into separate little baggies. For the first experience (Saturday night), I had ingested 150mg of 4-FMP earlier that evening and stayed up mostly reading bluelight and Erowid until about 5am. At this point, the empathy was long gone and the stimulation was mostly gone from the 4-FMP, but it's possible that the two had some sort of interaction.
Anyway, I estimated a 40mg dose by bumping tiny piles off of a pen cap. I did probably 10mg at first, then as a felt a rather plesant but strange light buzz creep over me, I bumped the rest. After a few minutes, I started to feel very strange, sort of like when you're starting to black out. My vision began to get a little gray and I began swaying in my seat, which surprised me because I thought I had done only enough ketamine to receive lighter effects than this. I soon found that I had to go lay down in my bed because I was starting to get uncomfortable. Fortunately, as soon as I laid down, I immediately felt better. I closed my eyes and had only the drone of the fan on for noise. The experience that follows was definitely vague, but more intense than I had expected. I slowly started to feel as if my awareness was centered in my head. I could still feel the rest of my body, and move it as several attempts proved, but moving or opening my eyes broke the spell, so I tried to remain completely still. I had no sensation of movement, but strange, vague patterns and unexplainable objects began to appear to me behind my closed eyes, and I started to have strange thoughts. Seeing as how I am writing this two days later, I can't really remember what my thoughts were, but they were definitely abnormal. I was hoping that by writing this I might remember some of them, but it seems that I can't. I basically felt as if I was travelling deeply but aimlessly into my mind. After an indeterminable length of time, I fell asleep, but this transition was not distinct in my mind. I only know I fell asleep because I woke up over an hour later, and then fell back to sleep because it was almost morning anyway. I woke up feeling fine and clear-headed, though not particularly positive or anything.
The next night (Sunday night), I decided to test it again, because I plan to induce a full experience this weekend and I don't really want to do it on a weeknight since I have to work every morning. This time, I insufflated 60-70mg (estimated however), all at once this time. Surprisingly fast, shockingly really, I started to feel like I was about to faint again, very strongly. After only a couple of minutes, I stood up from my chair to travel across the hall to my bedroom, and the world tilted crazily. I stumbled awkwardly to my bed and flopped down on it, nearly falling half a dozen times. It was definitely significantly stronger than I expected, and there was absolutely no way I'd have been able to do anything but lay down with my eyes closed for this. As I did so, I noticed that my awaremess immediately shifted into my head, and my body felt very disproportional and strange, and I couldn't really feel it much at all. I started to feel like I was moving as a wave does in the ocean, wider and wider, until I started to feela bit of fear due to this strange sensation of motion. I opened my eyes for a moment, and it stopped, but the surrounding dark room made very little sense. it's not that it looked any different, but that my ability to perceive depth and meaning in objects was inhibited. Plus, I started to feel kind of nasty with my eyes open, so I went to closed eyes, which was an intense but pleasant feeling. What followed was another series of strange, unrememberable thoughts and slight visions, though this time the visions were much fainter, probably due to slight tolerance from the night before. The physical effects, however, were certainly much stronger. it's also possible I took less than I thought the first time, or more than I thought the second time. I really wish I could remember more of what I encountered with my eyes closed, but I just can't, as it was too abstract. I felt as if I were touching on something profound, and at moments I felt as if I was leaving my body entirely. One notable occurrence was when, at some point, my girlfriend who was sleeping next to me shifted and rolled over so that her arm and leg were draped over my body. At this point, I found it nearly impossible to differentiate between her limbs and mine, and I felt as if I was feeling the touch of skin against skin through both hers touching mine and mine touching hers. It was strange but very interesting. Again, I transitioned into sleep at some point and woke up roughly an hour later with the effects mostly gone, and then fell asleep again. This morning I woke up feeling rather groggy, but that passed as I got up and went about my day.
So that's what I've made of my first two trials with ketamine. next weekend I plan on trying to insufflate 200mg (in two increments) in order to reach the so-called K-hole, and I'm going to save the other 200 for another experiment, after the peak of some other psychedelic, of which variety I am not yet sure. I'm a little nervous because of the intensity of the second trial, and I hope that it'll be a little clearer and easier to remember when I do get there. Any comments or suggestions would be appreciated, as I have only this very limited experience to guide me by.
substancecode_ketamine
I had received 500mg of ketamine. So I divided it up by eye into two piles of 200mg and one of 100mg and put them into separate little baggies. For the first experience (Saturday night), I had ingested 150mg of 4-FMP earlier that evening and stayed up mostly reading bluelight and Erowid until about 5am. At this point, the empathy was long gone and the stimulation was mostly gone from the 4-FMP, but it's possible that the two had some sort of interaction.
Anyway, I estimated a 40mg dose by bumping tiny piles off of a pen cap. I did probably 10mg at first, then as a felt a rather plesant but strange light buzz creep over me, I bumped the rest. After a few minutes, I started to feel very strange, sort of like when you're starting to black out. My vision began to get a little gray and I began swaying in my seat, which surprised me because I thought I had done only enough ketamine to receive lighter effects than this. I soon found that I had to go lay down in my bed because I was starting to get uncomfortable. Fortunately, as soon as I laid down, I immediately felt better. I closed my eyes and had only the drone of the fan on for noise. The experience that follows was definitely vague, but more intense than I had expected. I slowly started to feel as if my awareness was centered in my head. I could still feel the rest of my body, and move it as several attempts proved, but moving or opening my eyes broke the spell, so I tried to remain completely still. I had no sensation of movement, but strange, vague patterns and unexplainable objects began to appear to me behind my closed eyes, and I started to have strange thoughts. Seeing as how I am writing this two days later, I can't really remember what my thoughts were, but they were definitely abnormal. I was hoping that by writing this I might remember some of them, but it seems that I can't. I basically felt as if I was travelling deeply but aimlessly into my mind. After an indeterminable length of time, I fell asleep, but this transition was not distinct in my mind. I only know I fell asleep because I woke up over an hour later, and then fell back to sleep because it was almost morning anyway. I woke up feeling fine and clear-headed, though not particularly positive or anything.
The next night (Sunday night), I decided to test it again, because I plan to induce a full experience this weekend and I don't really want to do it on a weeknight since I have to work every morning. This time, I insufflated 60-70mg (estimated however), all at once this time. Surprisingly fast, shockingly really, I started to feel like I was about to faint again, very strongly. After only a couple of minutes, I stood up from my chair to travel across the hall to my bedroom, and the world tilted crazily. I stumbled awkwardly to my bed and flopped down on it, nearly falling half a dozen times. It was definitely significantly stronger than I expected, and there was absolutely no way I'd have been able to do anything but lay down with my eyes closed for this. As I did so, I noticed that my awaremess immediately shifted into my head, and my body felt very disproportional and strange, and I couldn't really feel it much at all. I started to feel like I was moving as a wave does in the ocean, wider and wider, until I started to feela bit of fear due to this strange sensation of motion. I opened my eyes for a moment, and it stopped, but the surrounding dark room made very little sense. it's not that it looked any different, but that my ability to perceive depth and meaning in objects was inhibited. Plus, I started to feel kind of nasty with my eyes open, so I went to closed eyes, which was an intense but pleasant feeling. What followed was another series of strange, unrememberable thoughts and slight visions, though this time the visions were much fainter, probably due to slight tolerance from the night before. The physical effects, however, were certainly much stronger. it's also possible I took less than I thought the first time, or more than I thought the second time. I really wish I could remember more of what I encountered with my eyes closed, but I just can't, as it was too abstract. I felt as if I were touching on something profound, and at moments I felt as if I was leaving my body entirely. One notable occurrence was when, at some point, my girlfriend who was sleeping next to me shifted and rolled over so that her arm and leg were draped over my body. At this point, I found it nearly impossible to differentiate between her limbs and mine, and I felt as if I was feeling the touch of skin against skin through both hers touching mine and mine touching hers. It was strange but very interesting. Again, I transitioned into sleep at some point and woke up roughly an hour later with the effects mostly gone, and then fell asleep again. This morning I woke up feeling rather groggy, but that passed as I got up and went about my day.
So that's what I've made of my first two trials with ketamine. next weekend I plan on trying to insufflate 200mg (in two increments) in order to reach the so-called K-hole, and I'm going to save the other 200 for another experiment, after the peak of some other psychedelic, of which variety I am not yet sure. I'm a little nervous because of the intensity of the second trial, and I hope that it'll be a little clearer and easier to remember when I do get there. Any comments or suggestions would be appreciated, as I have only this very limited experience to guide me by.
substancecode_ketamine
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