gavatron@oz
Bluelighter
Sure i said long story short at the start of that. Its a novel!
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Life Advice & Visual Arts
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Just pick up and go!?!
- Thread starter qbjb24
- Start date
I thank you for taking the time to share your experience and wish you well on your new journey.
I have a nice car and a boat myself, but I don't have a great job that's going anywhere and I dont have a lady. I have possessions that would make some people happy, and I thought that's what I needed, but realized none of it means anything to me and would walk away from it all today.
I don't have a drug problem unless you count weed, but I actually take breaks from that which I'm on one now(2 weeks thus far).
I'm just at a weird point in my life and I need an experience to wake me up and find out what I'm really made of.
At this point I'm eyeing California because that'd be about as far as I could go, and don't know anyone out there, although I have a cousin that lives in NoCal, but if I make it to any degree out there I'd feel really good about myself.
Plus winter's hitting here soon, and the thought of skipping a winter sounds awesome!!
I moved from Chicago, where I've lived all my life, to South Carolina. I stayed for about 8 months, and I hated it. Usually I adjust well to whatever life throws at me, but this time I was so homesick. I missed my friends, my family, the familiarity of home. There really is no place like home.
I agree that there's nothing like home. I've taken a few vacations, and always clamor to be back in my comfort zone, but I know what's here already so coming back is always an option. The unknown can be scary but the experience good or bad is always rewarding.
Chicago is an awesome city I'd love to live there too, but I'm in the D (suburbs) and although I do love the city I haven't been out enough to know what's what.
Thanks for sharing.
Perpetual Indulgence
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Jun 13, 2004
- Messages
- 20,518
Home is no longer where my parents live or where I grew up it is where I am now so I don't get homesick.
^i have a bad habit of calling anywhere i lived home. i still refer to my friend's second bedroom in seattle as my room. when i visit, i forget to call it his place and invite friends back to our apartment.
cali can be rather expensive. i moved to so cal with very little notice (3 weeks) and it put a big dent in my wallet. it was mostly little costs like a deposit for the electricity, tags for my car, a new license and so on. and the taxes are high. but i suppose the weather and being near the beach make it worth it
cali can be rather expensive. i moved to so cal with very little notice (3 weeks) and it put a big dent in my wallet. it was mostly little costs like a deposit for the electricity, tags for my car, a new license and so on. and the taxes are high. but i suppose the weather and being near the beach make it worth it
^i have a bad habit of calling anywhere i lived home. i still refer to my friend's second bedroom in seattle as my room. when i visit, i forget to call it his place and invite friends back to our apartment.
cali can be rather expensive. i moved to so cal with very little notice (3 weeks) and it put a big dent in my wallet. it was mostly little costs like a deposit for the electricity, tags for my car, a new license and so on. and the taxes are high. but i suppose the weather and being near the beach make it worth it
I understand cali's more expensive than MI...however it's all relative...min wage here is 7.40 and in cali it's 8.00
not a huge difference but thats minimum. also i know it sounds crazy but I plan on sleeping in my car for about a month. thatll give me time to find any job thatll have me and i wont blow my savings. Im not goin out there w/o a couple grand at least.
Im def looking for a challenge and dont expect it to be easy at all. Thaz why I think it'll be rewarding when I do get settled and establish myself.
Thank you for the input and please keep it coming if you think of anything someone like me could benefit from.
Im taking everything in consideration.
pastelcircus
Bluelighter
michigan is where i was born and raised,
started getting into trouble, so i jumped ship
i did run from my problems
colorado is the shit,
i got here 8 months ago, admittedly have been a pussy about actually enjoying it,
but there's shit to enjoy
there's a lot of shit to do, which is good,
cause i'm sobering up a lot.
at home, we just drank and got fucked up out of boredom.
so i would recommend like everybody else to make sure you leave on a good note, say goodbye
i didn't say goodbye so that's been the biggest bitch
but this is what i chose so
*shrugs
started getting into trouble, so i jumped ship
i did run from my problems
colorado is the shit,
i got here 8 months ago, admittedly have been a pussy about actually enjoying it,
but there's shit to enjoy
there's a lot of shit to do, which is good,
cause i'm sobering up a lot.
at home, we just drank and got fucked up out of boredom.
so i would recommend like everybody else to make sure you leave on a good note, say goodbye
i didn't say goodbye so that's been the biggest bitch
but this is what i chose so
*shrugs
I am from WI. After the end of my last marriage to an abuse whackadoo I decided screw this. One day I just packed my car.. and moved to MN. Best thing I ever did. I met my husband there and a year and a half later we were married. We have a 6 year old daughter together and Life is pretty happy for now
Hey wsup fomer fellow neighbor...Good job at taking some action on turning your life around even if you didn't leave exactly how you wanted. It's never too late to call your people and explain to them what was up and why you did it. If they don't understand you're tryin to change things for the better then maybe they weren't worth it anyway.
The people I know that've lived there only have ever said great things about it. It's def on my short list of places to live and visit at the very least.
I've heard colorado is crazy scenic? Where abouts did you end up? U know sum1 there prior to jumpin ship?
On a funny note if you get a hand job on a bus in Denver you can consider yourself a member of the mile high club.
Good luck homey and if you ever feel like updating anything interesting feel free to holla anytime.
I am from WI. After the end of my last marriage to an abuse whackadoo I decided screw this. One day I just packed my car.. and moved to MN. Best thing I ever did. I met my husband there and a year and a half later we were married. We have a 6 year old daughter together and Life is pretty happy for now
Very good to hear girly...I'm so glad you got out of a relationship like that, no women deserves that ever and I hope your ex either completely changed or got what was comin to him, which ever first ; )
Wonderful story all together I hope at least one person can gain from your experience by reading this.
Good luck with your future and with your family.
Thank you very much! I hope so too. I have no clue where he is, and he has no clue where I am.. all for the best!
gavatron@oz
Bluelighter
Youd be suprised how common it is for people at 30 to realise that the life/ person they have created for themselves is nothing near what and who they are.
At 18,( in oz) your asked to decide what you want to do in life,regards to tertiary study.. Fuck,at 1 I had trouble deciding what drink to order at the bar,let alone my future .
Materialistic things can only make you so happy. Some of the best moments in my lifes memories are from when i had fuckall to my name. And ive had th $120K + a year job along the way.
I still recomend getting out amongst it mate. Just one tip,dont give up on your first bump/hurdle. Stick it out,and you'll find what it is that your looking for.and it may surprise you when you do. But you'll be glad that you searched.
At 18,( in oz) your asked to decide what you want to do in life,regards to tertiary study.. Fuck,at 1 I had trouble deciding what drink to order at the bar,let alone my future .
Materialistic things can only make you so happy. Some of the best moments in my lifes memories are from when i had fuckall to my name. And ive had th $120K + a year job along the way.
I still recomend getting out amongst it mate. Just one tip,dont give up on your first bump/hurdle. Stick it out,and you'll find what it is that your looking for.and it may surprise you when you do. But you'll be glad that you searched.
Mariposa
Bluelight Crew
I have done just this, not once but twice. I would not recommend this as a quick fix for any problems a person is having, whether they be related to addiction or not. Thanks for this thread, as I am considering doing just this again. Drugs are not involved.
I moved around a lot as a kid due to my father's job and my parents' divorce. Louisiana --> New York/Ontario --> Florida. My father eventually won custody of me after a 7-year battle. I went to high school and college in two different parts of Florida. I hated the town I lived in my first year of college, so I returned to my dad's after my freshman year. He then decided to move to California. I was blindsided, but I stuck around due to my school and the fact that I had an awesome job with an amazing firm.
The tipping point was when I found out that the boyfriend for whom I gave up what might have been a healthier relationship was cheating on me. I was 23. It was my first experience with true and genuine heartbreak. He was like a drug to me. I was still with him when I joined Bluelight, in retrospect! He wanted me back after things didn't work out with his paralegal. I said fuck no.
I called my father the morning after I found out my boyfriend was being unfaithful. I told him what had happened, and that I wanted to move to California (Bay Area). My father supported my decision; he was very pleased to have me out there. I had visited a few times. I love the Bay Area. It is expensive throughout California. I lived with my dad for a few months while I saved up for my own place. Got my own place, got a job, made friends surprisingly easily.
7 years later, I received an opportunity in Oregon that I could not pass up. The new firm I found decided to close its doors after 99 years (I'd been there almost 3 years). I went through some personal issues, and I have family in Oregon. I grabbed the opportunity, which should not have been a shock to anyone. I am a creature of impulse. It is only later that I look back.
Right now, I have 3 different (realistic) opportunities available to me, and I can't drag out this decision. I can permanently reside in Oregon, which has its advantages. I can uproot once again and move to Seattle, where my field of work is more in demand. Or, I can go back to the Bay for good, to many of my friends, family, and our family businesses. I had planned to settle in Oregon and live a happy family life with my now ex-boyfriend, but that is something I know in my heart I need to leave behind due to his issues, which I am unable and unwilling to take on as my own. Now it is time for Plan B.
OP: yeah, your problems WILL follow you wherever you are. If you're into the drug scene, it will find you even if you don't find it. I don't see any downside to uprooting your life, provided you are willing and able to make the improvements you need. If you feel stuck in a rut and want a new and interesting set of circumstances to surround you, then my best suggestion is to formulate a plan based on sound decisions and treat your new life as an adventure. Most of all - have fun.
If anyone ever figures this out, please let me know!
I moved around a lot as a kid due to my father's job and my parents' divorce. Louisiana --> New York/Ontario --> Florida. My father eventually won custody of me after a 7-year battle. I went to high school and college in two different parts of Florida. I hated the town I lived in my first year of college, so I returned to my dad's after my freshman year. He then decided to move to California. I was blindsided, but I stuck around due to my school and the fact that I had an awesome job with an amazing firm.
The tipping point was when I found out that the boyfriend for whom I gave up what might have been a healthier relationship was cheating on me. I was 23. It was my first experience with true and genuine heartbreak. He was like a drug to me. I was still with him when I joined Bluelight, in retrospect! He wanted me back after things didn't work out with his paralegal. I said fuck no.
I called my father the morning after I found out my boyfriend was being unfaithful. I told him what had happened, and that I wanted to move to California (Bay Area). My father supported my decision; he was very pleased to have me out there. I had visited a few times. I love the Bay Area. It is expensive throughout California. I lived with my dad for a few months while I saved up for my own place. Got my own place, got a job, made friends surprisingly easily.
7 years later, I received an opportunity in Oregon that I could not pass up. The new firm I found decided to close its doors after 99 years (I'd been there almost 3 years). I went through some personal issues, and I have family in Oregon. I grabbed the opportunity, which should not have been a shock to anyone. I am a creature of impulse. It is only later that I look back.
Right now, I have 3 different (realistic) opportunities available to me, and I can't drag out this decision. I can permanently reside in Oregon, which has its advantages. I can uproot once again and move to Seattle, where my field of work is more in demand. Or, I can go back to the Bay for good, to many of my friends, family, and our family businesses. I had planned to settle in Oregon and live a happy family life with my now ex-boyfriend, but that is something I know in my heart I need to leave behind due to his issues, which I am unable and unwilling to take on as my own. Now it is time for Plan B.
OP: yeah, your problems WILL follow you wherever you are. If you're into the drug scene, it will find you even if you don't find it. I don't see any downside to uprooting your life, provided you are willing and able to make the improvements you need. If you feel stuck in a rut and want a new and interesting set of circumstances to surround you, then my best suggestion is to formulate a plan based on sound decisions and treat your new life as an adventure. Most of all - have fun.
If anyone ever figures this out, please let me know!
Mariposa
Bluelight Crew
You're absolutely correct. I had a set of circumstances I did not expect thrown at me in my late 20s/early 30s. It's carrying forward to even now that I am 31! My 30th birthday occurred about a week after I made a tremendous life upheaval. I treated it as a milestone and a guidepoint. I thought my self-esteem would be adversely affected by turning 30. I got over all of the jokes relatively quickly and had a nice dinner with my family that day.
I am still, at heart, the person I was in my 20s. I was very serious about my career and my future then. I'm attending to that with a more mature and enlightened perspective. It has not been easy.
As the song goes: I'm old enough to know better, but still too young to care. :D
Good insight from both of you, and yes 30 seems to be that fork in the road to life. I wanna feel proud of myself through the decisions that I make when I look back later on and right now there's a lot of room for improvement in that area.
No drug problem here, however I like to party and am in no way sotally tober ; )
I'm eyeing so cal right now, I think it's prolly one of the biggest challenges I could set for myself being so far away and I only have a couple cousins that live in no cal, so it'll be all on me to succeed. I like the culture from what I've read/heard there and would love to experience it. I do have some confidence issues, but I think it could be therapeutic to self improve and have a good experience to feel good about, especially with some success. And who knows maybe I find out something about myself I never knew.
I'm well aware of how expensive it can be and I'm currently clearing debts and saving money to give myself a small head start upon arrival. I'll do whatever it takes and I don't quit very easily. I've been through the rough enough in my life so I can take a lot of bs.
Well were half way thru september and Ive given it some thought and it makes the most sense to spend the holiday's with the fam see as how I prolly won't see them for a while. And by early Jan I should have set myself up for a move and have plenty of money saved by then.
RecklessWOT
Bluelight Crew
I'm from Connecticut and as long as I've been old enough to grasp the concept I have wanted to get the fuck out of here. I did actually leave once, I moved to Florida and it lasted all of a month, if that. After I moved out of my parent's a couple weeks after 18 (well, dad moved away from me actually) I stayed in the state for about 3 years and went nowhere. I decided it was time for a change and took off, i didn't even tell my best of friends (who are really my only family) until 2 days before I left. It was one of the most depressing times of my life probably because I left on such a bad note. I was really depressed, really broke, really fucked up and I thought it would cheer me up being down there in the sun but all I did was wallow in my own misery, and on top of that I felt out of place not being around my home. I came back up here and had to try again and it ended up working out fine for a while once I got back. I've had my ups and downs since then, but I doubt it will be better anywhere else really.
If you can make it work, then best of luck to you. Hope you find what you're looking for. Some people can pull it off, others can't.
If you can make it work, then best of luck to you. Hope you find what you're looking for. Some people can pull it off, others can't.
Thanks for sharing your experience. For me I've always been an independent person so I think I'll be ok on my own. I'm sorry it didn't work out for you the way it was planned. Everyone's different and at the very least you can never be mad you didn't at least try. That's what I always think, "if I don't try I'll always regret that more than failing." So to be honest if I try and it doesn't work out I'll still be ok because at least I gave it effort and I know I won't regret that.
As these days go I find myself longing more and more to do it so I'm pretty confident at this point I'm making the right decision. I'm planning and researching everyday and I think january 2012 I'll be in my car heading west!! I'm so excited for a change.
The Straight Dope
Bluelighter
Wow this is such a great thread! Makes me glad I decided to check back on this forum, definitely some great people that have interesting things to say on here!
Seedless/bagochina: The things you write remind me so much of my own life down to the very fact that we're both from Chicago that it really is crazy to remember that there are people who've gone through many of the same things I have in life. I have really enjoyed reading your writings for what has become years now, and it's really cool that you still come on here and are still active!
So here goes:
After miraculously surviving an overdose, my family just couldn't put up with my shit anymore and it was decided that I would be sent away from my beloved hometown of Chicago, first I was sent to the great city of London in the United Kingdom, this was actually really cool for a while, to be in a different country. The culture of the UK is very similar yet very different from that of the US, the original plan was to be that I would find a school to go to and get myself a student visa to stay down there. It was definitely an amazing experience, and there's definitely some very cool people over there! I didn't really sign up for school as I barely graduated high school, and my transcripts were shit, and over there the education system is not as forgiving as it is in the US. After a few months down there, I saw that my life wasn't really going anywhere and I couldn't spend all my time hanging out at pubs and trying to score chicks with my american accent. I got into injecting speedballs of crack and heroin #3 with citric acid powder, though I never let it escalate to the point of gaining a dependency, though I saw with the lack of oppurtunities for myself down there that it wouldn't take long for that to happen. Oh yeah did I mention London is expensive as FUCK? I'll never regret the 4-5 months that I spent living down there, so much class down there, and a level of culture and history that you don't have as much in the US, I still feel I made the right decision to come back to the US. Now came a time when I legitimately needed to think about my future, I had wanted to move to NYC, but my family decided that it was to be LA, specifically Hollywood, where I am today. Originally I moved out here to get some sort of paid work in the film industry, I had signed up to go back to school, and I actually did do some work on a few pilots and met some pretty cool people. Somehow I got sucked back into my childhood/teenage love for music and I had to give up working on film projects because of how much dedication and time it asked for hence where I am now and have been for like the last 6 months: playing lead guitar in a band. It has actually done me a lot of good to reawaken my love for writing and composing music for songs. And it really is a nice feeling to be on a stage in front of a bunch of people and seeing them actually enjoy what I'm playing. The adrenaline rush and feeling I get from that really can not be replicated by any sort of drugs, and I have done a decent amount of them while out here. Black tar heroin just doesn't cut it and it straight up just doesn't give the same kind of rush and noddy feeling that the china white of Chicago does, though I definitely feel like meth is a much better high than smoking crack, much smoother and it doesn't give you the rough ass comedown, though I feel kinda icky after every time I do it.
Anyhow, we started the band out here with the intentions of getting signed and actually going on tour and making some cash through it, but I'm getting the feeling that just might not happen, regardless I've gained so much experience and practice writing songs and whatnot, and I've taught myself how to read sheet music through this process, I feel I can easily get an accelerated degree in music from a college since I already know what they'd be trying to teach me, and of course I can get a job as a music teacher or some shit if need be.
But yeah I feel the band I'm in is hitting a wall in terms of progress, and it's not doing enough for me to justify staying out here and continuing to pay rent, and around the end of october or so my one year term for the lease on my apartment will be up. It's also pretty wild to live in a place as classy as London to move somewhere that lacks class as much as Hollywood. There's a LOT of REALLY lame people that live in LA that have moved here from all over the place, many straight up ignorant and immature types that lack the kind of sophistication you'd find in many of the people that live in Chicago. Basically my plan is to record a demo of some of the best songs we've written so I have something to show for having lived out here, and then it'll be back to my beloved Chicago, and quite like bagochina said Chicago really is possibly the greatest city on earth, there's just this beauty in seeing that skyline that penetrates straight into my soul. All the buildings in LA are ugly as fuck, I'm tired of only having one season year round and seeing palm trees all the time, there's an intense quiet beauty in Chicago during the wintertime that I miss dearly. I'm already in talks with some people I know to start a new band in Chicago, with REALLY good lead vocals this time and solid musical instrumentation, and knowing music as well as I do this would definitely be the project that actually gets me paid to play music and go on tour across the country. I'm looking to knock out some more college credits while I'm back there doing all of this so this should be it. I don't regret living in LA for one year one bit, as it has brought back the musician in me and taken my abilities to a whole new level to the point of becoming reacquainted with myself in so many levels. LA just feels sooo FAKE, while Chicago is a place that just feels so intensely REAL. I did take a road trip to San Francisco while staying out here at one point, and I definitely feel like I like it a lot better than LA even though I only spent one night there. I'm definitely not a hippie, but in true SF psychedelic fashion I tripped balls and had one of the best nights of my life. The people over there are extremely friendly and so much positive vibes I love it, these 2 girls we randomly met down there straight up took us not only into their homes but into their beds so we had a place to spend the night haah, too bad I was a bit tired and shroomed to do anything sexually. Nice architecture and I love going up and down the hills while driving in SF. Much better skyline as well as much better historic buildings and neighborhoods in SF than in LA, coming from Chicago these things are really important to me. I feel like the people are much cooler and friendlier and happier over there as well, and yeah it just straight up doesn't have the overpopulation and oversaturation that LA has. After NYC San Francisco is definitely one of the places I wouldn't mind having the experience of living in at some point.
But yeah there is definitely something incredibly special about Chicago, that I don't feel is possible to find perhaps anywhere else in the world. The city is so incredibly tall and grand with the most incredible skyscrapers and skyline, yet at the same time it's not overpopulated and oversaturated with stupid people moving there from all over trying to get a piece of the pie. I would love to experience living in NYC, but I get the feeling that because of how big the place is, that you would be more anonymous as a person over there than Chicago. Chicago: grand yet intimate. I just love grand architecture and classy people, both of which LA sadly lacks and has contributed to my decision to leave here, unless I somehow miraculously get a record deal within the next 2 months.
So yeah moving somewhere can be an incredible experience, I highly suggest taking careful consideration to plan out just what it is you'd like to do, career-wise and whatnot, and to start fresh socially and making new friends do not forget to be picky with the friends you make. Many people from small towns just do not understand this concept and will make friends with the first people they meet, I absolutely take into consideration just what added benefit comes into my life from associating with someone, especially if you're into doing hard drugs be careful of who you spend your time with and try to surround yourself with positive intelligent people that bring out better things in yourself. The person I was room mates with when I first moved to LA did not get this concept and was quick to make friends with these straight up socially unacceptable fucking hicks from rural Alabama that lived down the hall from me. Thankfully the lease is under my name and I was quick to rid myself of this room mate, and it wasn't long before the hicks got evicted from their apartment from just not being able to hack it out here. The dude who was my room mate wasn't able to hack it out here either and does not live in LA anymore and he had to move back in with his parents. It's a cruel world, and being naive can ruin you, and for some people it seems that it takes a lot for them to learn things even if it is the hard way.
Sorry for the long post but this is a subject of discussion that very much hits home for me and is always on my mind. I am definitely excited to make my way back to Chicago, pretty much some of the best times of my life took place in places like wicker park, lincoln park, the south loop, I've been to some really rad parties inside people's apartments within the massive high rises of the gold coast as well. I shall not sleep on my entire drive back to chicago, and I'm thinking the meth should make driving through the repetitive mind-numbing fields/plains territories of Nebraska/Iowa more bearable. I am thinking of stopping at random places along the way and busting out my acoustic guitar and playing and singing a few songs and busking a bit to help pay for the gas, I actually think doing this could lead to meeting some interesting people and leading to interesting adventures in completely random places. Also a good way to take a break here and there from the 30 hours of driving that lays ahead. Who knows, maybe it could get me laid in a barnyard with a hot chick in true country fashion, and then her conservative christian dad can pitchfork my ass back to the road. It's been over a year and a half and I truly believe I can come back to Chicago this time around without driving myself into an opiate dependency again, over a year and a half that I haven't had to feel the horrors of withdrawling, I'm actually pretty proud of myself to be able to write that.
Well hope you enjoyed reading my little composition I wrote.
Seedless/bagochina: The things you write remind me so much of my own life down to the very fact that we're both from Chicago that it really is crazy to remember that there are people who've gone through many of the same things I have in life. I have really enjoyed reading your writings for what has become years now, and it's really cool that you still come on here and are still active!
So here goes:
After miraculously surviving an overdose, my family just couldn't put up with my shit anymore and it was decided that I would be sent away from my beloved hometown of Chicago, first I was sent to the great city of London in the United Kingdom, this was actually really cool for a while, to be in a different country. The culture of the UK is very similar yet very different from that of the US, the original plan was to be that I would find a school to go to and get myself a student visa to stay down there. It was definitely an amazing experience, and there's definitely some very cool people over there! I didn't really sign up for school as I barely graduated high school, and my transcripts were shit, and over there the education system is not as forgiving as it is in the US. After a few months down there, I saw that my life wasn't really going anywhere and I couldn't spend all my time hanging out at pubs and trying to score chicks with my american accent. I got into injecting speedballs of crack and heroin #3 with citric acid powder, though I never let it escalate to the point of gaining a dependency, though I saw with the lack of oppurtunities for myself down there that it wouldn't take long for that to happen. Oh yeah did I mention London is expensive as FUCK? I'll never regret the 4-5 months that I spent living down there, so much class down there, and a level of culture and history that you don't have as much in the US, I still feel I made the right decision to come back to the US. Now came a time when I legitimately needed to think about my future, I had wanted to move to NYC, but my family decided that it was to be LA, specifically Hollywood, where I am today. Originally I moved out here to get some sort of paid work in the film industry, I had signed up to go back to school, and I actually did do some work on a few pilots and met some pretty cool people. Somehow I got sucked back into my childhood/teenage love for music and I had to give up working on film projects because of how much dedication and time it asked for hence where I am now and have been for like the last 6 months: playing lead guitar in a band. It has actually done me a lot of good to reawaken my love for writing and composing music for songs. And it really is a nice feeling to be on a stage in front of a bunch of people and seeing them actually enjoy what I'm playing. The adrenaline rush and feeling I get from that really can not be replicated by any sort of drugs, and I have done a decent amount of them while out here. Black tar heroin just doesn't cut it and it straight up just doesn't give the same kind of rush and noddy feeling that the china white of Chicago does, though I definitely feel like meth is a much better high than smoking crack, much smoother and it doesn't give you the rough ass comedown, though I feel kinda icky after every time I do it.
Anyhow, we started the band out here with the intentions of getting signed and actually going on tour and making some cash through it, but I'm getting the feeling that just might not happen, regardless I've gained so much experience and practice writing songs and whatnot, and I've taught myself how to read sheet music through this process, I feel I can easily get an accelerated degree in music from a college since I already know what they'd be trying to teach me, and of course I can get a job as a music teacher or some shit if need be.
But yeah I feel the band I'm in is hitting a wall in terms of progress, and it's not doing enough for me to justify staying out here and continuing to pay rent, and around the end of october or so my one year term for the lease on my apartment will be up. It's also pretty wild to live in a place as classy as London to move somewhere that lacks class as much as Hollywood. There's a LOT of REALLY lame people that live in LA that have moved here from all over the place, many straight up ignorant and immature types that lack the kind of sophistication you'd find in many of the people that live in Chicago. Basically my plan is to record a demo of some of the best songs we've written so I have something to show for having lived out here, and then it'll be back to my beloved Chicago, and quite like bagochina said Chicago really is possibly the greatest city on earth, there's just this beauty in seeing that skyline that penetrates straight into my soul. All the buildings in LA are ugly as fuck, I'm tired of only having one season year round and seeing palm trees all the time, there's an intense quiet beauty in Chicago during the wintertime that I miss dearly. I'm already in talks with some people I know to start a new band in Chicago, with REALLY good lead vocals this time and solid musical instrumentation, and knowing music as well as I do this would definitely be the project that actually gets me paid to play music and go on tour across the country. I'm looking to knock out some more college credits while I'm back there doing all of this so this should be it. I don't regret living in LA for one year one bit, as it has brought back the musician in me and taken my abilities to a whole new level to the point of becoming reacquainted with myself in so many levels. LA just feels sooo FAKE, while Chicago is a place that just feels so intensely REAL. I did take a road trip to San Francisco while staying out here at one point, and I definitely feel like I like it a lot better than LA even though I only spent one night there. I'm definitely not a hippie, but in true SF psychedelic fashion I tripped balls and had one of the best nights of my life. The people over there are extremely friendly and so much positive vibes I love it, these 2 girls we randomly met down there straight up took us not only into their homes but into their beds so we had a place to spend the night haah, too bad I was a bit tired and shroomed to do anything sexually. Nice architecture and I love going up and down the hills while driving in SF. Much better skyline as well as much better historic buildings and neighborhoods in SF than in LA, coming from Chicago these things are really important to me. I feel like the people are much cooler and friendlier and happier over there as well, and yeah it just straight up doesn't have the overpopulation and oversaturation that LA has. After NYC San Francisco is definitely one of the places I wouldn't mind having the experience of living in at some point.
But yeah there is definitely something incredibly special about Chicago, that I don't feel is possible to find perhaps anywhere else in the world. The city is so incredibly tall and grand with the most incredible skyscrapers and skyline, yet at the same time it's not overpopulated and oversaturated with stupid people moving there from all over trying to get a piece of the pie. I would love to experience living in NYC, but I get the feeling that because of how big the place is, that you would be more anonymous as a person over there than Chicago. Chicago: grand yet intimate. I just love grand architecture and classy people, both of which LA sadly lacks and has contributed to my decision to leave here, unless I somehow miraculously get a record deal within the next 2 months.
So yeah moving somewhere can be an incredible experience, I highly suggest taking careful consideration to plan out just what it is you'd like to do, career-wise and whatnot, and to start fresh socially and making new friends do not forget to be picky with the friends you make. Many people from small towns just do not understand this concept and will make friends with the first people they meet, I absolutely take into consideration just what added benefit comes into my life from associating with someone, especially if you're into doing hard drugs be careful of who you spend your time with and try to surround yourself with positive intelligent people that bring out better things in yourself. The person I was room mates with when I first moved to LA did not get this concept and was quick to make friends with these straight up socially unacceptable fucking hicks from rural Alabama that lived down the hall from me. Thankfully the lease is under my name and I was quick to rid myself of this room mate, and it wasn't long before the hicks got evicted from their apartment from just not being able to hack it out here. The dude who was my room mate wasn't able to hack it out here either and does not live in LA anymore and he had to move back in with his parents. It's a cruel world, and being naive can ruin you, and for some people it seems that it takes a lot for them to learn things even if it is the hard way.
Sorry for the long post but this is a subject of discussion that very much hits home for me and is always on my mind. I am definitely excited to make my way back to Chicago, pretty much some of the best times of my life took place in places like wicker park, lincoln park, the south loop, I've been to some really rad parties inside people's apartments within the massive high rises of the gold coast as well. I shall not sleep on my entire drive back to chicago, and I'm thinking the meth should make driving through the repetitive mind-numbing fields/plains territories of Nebraska/Iowa more bearable. I am thinking of stopping at random places along the way and busting out my acoustic guitar and playing and singing a few songs and busking a bit to help pay for the gas, I actually think doing this could lead to meeting some interesting people and leading to interesting adventures in completely random places. Also a good way to take a break here and there from the 30 hours of driving that lays ahead. Who knows, maybe it could get me laid in a barnyard with a hot chick in true country fashion, and then her conservative christian dad can pitchfork my ass back to the road. It's been over a year and a half and I truly believe I can come back to Chicago this time around without driving myself into an opiate dependency again, over a year and a half that I haven't had to feel the horrors of withdrawling, I'm actually pretty proud of myself to be able to write that.
Well hope you enjoyed reading my little composition I wrote.
I was in a REALLY dark place in my life - just clambering out of a major depression when I was hit with a shit tonne of more bad news. I quit my job, rented out my property and emigrated (all within 5 days).
If you don't try these things then you will never know if they work - even if it all come crashing around about you you can always move back to your property and rethink your options/
If you don't try these things then you will never know if they work - even if it all come crashing around about you you can always move back to your property and rethink your options/
Wsup BL thanks for checkin in on this post. Im more familiar with your PR work so I'm glad to see you here too. And yes I totally agree with giving this a try regardless of what becomes of it. It's all I think about anymore, I gotta get out of here if only for a short time. Lately I've been having the worst luck it seems and every turn I take just seems to get worse. I attempted to sell my boat yesterday which wouldve funded some start up money for whatever journey I chose. Boat ran fine until the prospective buyer showed up, all of sudden something bad happened to the motor during the test drive. Obviously she was completely turned off and I was totally embarrased because I told her the boat was great prior to her arrival. Fack!!
But that wont deter me, I'm goin to make it happen one way or the other.
Thanks for the advice I'm taking it all in as I devise my plan. See ya on PR.