"just one more time"

[Candy_Raver]

Anyone ever had to deal with this experience. You had problems with the drug of choice, you gotten clean after a while, then you tell yourself " just one more time." But that " just one more time" isn't your last time, then it sprials out of control and your back to square one.

I'm curious to hear stories of folks who deluded themselves and said " just one more time" or " this is my last time" and bam it gets out of control.

I can't even count the number of times I told myself this quote, and it just never works out, it always ends up either a binge or back to full blown addiction.

-PLUR

 

[Anomaly88]

Yeah... thats what caused my relapse was the "just one more time" thinking... definitely did not work out and i was strung out for a good 2 months of every day using. It was prolly the worst iv'e ever been too.. I wouldn't take that chance ever again. That's your addiction talking bro. Trying to make it seem like its okay. Things could be different this time. I'll be more responsible.. yada yada yada. & I was saying it was my last time every time i used. lol.... and i was saying that for a good 2 months i forgot what it felt like and just wanted to try it one more time.. didn't work out to well

 

[SciCo]

I'm into week two of "just one more time". I keep telling myself I will stop on Friday when I check into an IOP.

Just one more time never works for addicts, and just one more time can mean your death.

 

[effie]

The brain has an amazing capacity to deceive itself.. we all know deep down that it won't be the last time - or we do until we are there making the decision - yet every time we manage to lie to ourselves. It is possible to break the cycle but it takes some training - recognising what you are doing, reminding yourself of all the reasons why it is not a good idea etc - what works best for me actually is delaying matters and doing something else to distract myself for a bit. That seems to give my brain time to work out that I am lying to myself and decide that I don't want to do it after all.. it's not easy, but it is possible!

 

[badfish45]

I agree with effie, we are an extremely deceptive species to ourselves, and we always know it's wrong but we do it anyway. I remember even just with weed when I was trying to stop that I would find some good opportunity to smoke and be all "well THIS will be my last time". That lasted for a couple of weeks for me, but I finally managed to break the cycle even though it is obviously much easier said than done. Just remember that temptations will always go away, you need to learn how to fight off temptation, and you will find that it gets easier as you practice with it.

 

[maxalfie]

Every time that I have ever had any clean time and I'm feeling great and got money in my pocket is when I fuck up again.
Like many others I think oh I will just score once at the weekend as a treat to myself for doing so well.
Without fail that one time treat rapidly turns into 2 or 3 times a week treat and then before I know it I am back with a fulltime habit.
To stay clean for me it has to be all or nothing, no little occasional treats.

 

[Missykins]

Absolutely all or nothing for moi as well-"just one more time" never worked, I didn't give my drug a goodbye kiss, so to speak, like some people do. I used last and them made the decision to go to rehab because I was so tortured.

 

[mrs_mia_wallace]

I don't know any addict who doesn't do "just one more time" or "I'm just gonna do it once, I'm not getting back into it." And it never, ever works out that way.

 

[endlessnameless]

I'm just about at my first week clean now and I'm already considering a weekend treat. I know if I get money into my possession its on, though. A weekend treat would be just fine, if I could stick to that. I never seem to get by the 6 month period though - but its better than a full blown habit, even though after all it is still a full blown habit for half the year.

 

[effie]

Could you stick to it though? What would prevent a weekend treat turning into more regular use, especially if you can justify it to yourself (bad day etc - it's amazing how much justification we can do to convince ourselves it is fine to use..)

Keeping it in your life means you aren't really giving yourself a chance to move forwards and learn to live without it - it keeps it at the forefront of your mind. You said yourself:

I can't even count the number of times I told myself this quote, and it just never works out, it always ends up either a binge or back to full blown addiction.

I know how hard it is to resist that voice saying "one more time won't hurt" but I think you have shown that it will end in disaster - there are very, very few addicts who can use their DOC recreationally without having a slip-up. Think about how far you have come, maybe write down the reasons why you don't want to end up addicted again.. and try to think of something else you can do to reward yourself, instead of using?

Have you had any addiction counselling?

Good luck