Just found out the girl I have feelings for is selling herself

[evilthree]

I've been involved with this girl for a couple months. She's bad in her addiction, and I suspected something was up with her getting money, but I tried to buy the shit she would tell me about borrowing money, etc. Well a mutual friend recently returned to the area and the girl I have feelings for confessed how she's been getting money. I'm devastated. I have no appetite, I can't sleep right, I can't focus. I have a load of legal issues and I'm trying my best to not get high or fuck this all up, but I feel like I'm ready to slip at any moment.

I know she's on the run from another county. She has a PO and hasn't reported, so she has a warrant. I really don't believe in telling, but I'm kind of at my wits end with what to do. I'm seriously considering calling up her PO and giving her whereabouts. Not just for her but for myself. I don't feel strong enough to cut her off or let her fall on her own, but her doing this is really messing up my self esteem. I know she isn't happy, I know she can't stand what she's doing(she's made comments about how she can't do it sober, she needs to be high to even stomach it), but I don't know what to do about it. I don't want to lose her, and I'm afraid if she does get taken in I will, or if she knows I did it then she will forever hold it against me. On the other hand, she could be grateful that someone actually cared enough to help her. I'm confused and lost, and hopefully someone can give me some advice here

 

[cj]

Dude no dont snitch on her thats beyond fucked up. Its her life shes allowed to live it however she wants to. Plus jail isnt going to solve any of her problems.

 

[DeathDomokun]

I've got to say, it's incredibly selfish of you to send her to jail for your own benefit, and it is foolish to think it will improve her life.
I would suggest talking to her before doing any irrational. I can understand why her aversion to doing so might upset you, but what is it about the act itself that has hurt you so much?
I think you should address some issues before doing anything obtuse.

 

[Tommyboy]

I agree with not snitching. I'm not sure if you doing anything illegal, but she could snitch on you if she finds out you snitched on her.

You've got to walk away from this. She didn't do any of this to hurt you, so why hurt her? If she's in a bad enough place (mentally and in her addition) where she has resorted to prostitution then she's already going through enough, so there is no need to kick her while she is down. Either let her go or try to help her out by encouraging and helping her to get into a rehab facility. I'm not a big fan of rehab but I think that addicts with that kind of baggage can benefit from it, and it will at least give her enough time to think about what she had been doing.

 

[evilthree]

I wish I had enough strength to walk away. I feel like I'm not good enough and this all reflects on how much I suck in life. Besides, I feel that me walking away is a complete loss on my part, and she loses nothing. I really wish I could just get high, unfortunately if I do then I go to jail or on the run

 

[Kerrigan]

I've got to say, it's incredibly selfish of you to send her to jail for your own benefit, and it is foolish to think it will improve her life.
I would suggest talking to her before doing any irrational.

I agree with not snitching. I'm not sure if you doing anything illegal, but she could snitch on you if she finds out you snitched on her.

You've got to walk away from this. She didn't do any of this to hurt you, so why hurt her? If she's in a bad enough place (mentally and in her addition) where she has resorted to prostitution then she's already going through enough, so there is no need to kick her while she is down.

My goodness, she trusts you enough to tell you about her life; her secrets; the things that she's not at all proud of, and your first thought is to throw it back into her face? That is a very BAD, BAD, BAD-BAD IDEA!

You can feel however you want to feel about it, but what about instead of sending her into jail, try to wrangle some sort of rehabilitation or a simple clinic-experience; have her write up an excellent resume and pass it about to potential employers and consider, if you're mentally and emotionally prepared for all of this and move in together!

Otherwise, if it's too much, you're going into this for the wrong reasons or it's not the love story of your life? Well, you can always WALK AWAY!

Prostitutes are a weakness of mine for a number of reasons, but if she genuinely hates her job and you can help her? Do it. Do it and feel wonderful about becoming a modest, 'umble saviour and end up spending a few years together with this obviously beautiful-yet-trapped young damsel in distress, and give her the chance to choose between getting clean and working for less money and less simply, or returning to what she says she loathes.

Hell, sex isn't all that tough, but pretending to care about some ugly stranger who wants to stuff his balls into your mouth? You're not going to find that easy to do, son.
It's a horrible situation, but there exist no qualifications that're required in order to love somebody...
Good luck and keep us updated, please?

 

[DooMMooD]

If you really care for her or love her, let her go. And shit even if you DONT, please walk the fuck away.

For her benefit AND yours, trust me on that one. This sounds like it will not be the healthiest of relationships and will only make things worse on you, as you continue to feel bad that the girl you care for is selling herself sexually to strangers.

That is just the tip of the iceberg of why this is not a good idea. Do yourself and her some favors man. Drop the microphone, turn around, and walk off stage. This will end badly for both of you I will give you good odds on that one.

And whatever you do DONT send her to jail. Ho lee shit. How incredibly selfish and unloving could you be? You think a night in the can is gonna stop her? Because you know she'd still be getting drugs in jail, putting her even deeper in debt (considering drugs can go for like 10-100X street value inside) and she'll just be WORSE OFF when she gets out because then she'll be even broker/have less places to go/etc etc etc.

Dont fuck her over because you want her all to yourself. Thats incredibly selfish and in a sense proves that you really dont care that much about her as a person and where her life is heading.

If you truly care & love someone enough you want the best for them, whether that has you in the picture or not. When you love someone you want them to be happy, period. Not JUST happy with you. Wanting someone to be happy WITH YOU ONLY is selfish pure and simple, not love.

Although being real: we all know youre gonna do what youre gonna do anyway. I just hope it ends up being something different than what youre thinking right now.