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Just found out im possessed by something

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BottleInABottle

Bluelighter
Joined
Feb 28, 2012
Messages
69
So 19 years later, I finally find out the frustrating and horrifying reason why my behaviour has been so strange all these years, especially the last years where Ive been quite unloving and selfish. It happens im apparently POSSESSED by something... a demon, ghost or whatever you call it, I dunno. Why it took so long for me to discover the fact was I doubted quite a lot as an atheist that such phenomena existed, although I did believe in ghosts. I have always thought my case of mental illness was very unique, though. Even the best doctor I had ever met was really confused about wth was going on with me. We tried a few meds together, antipsychotics to be specific (as I highly believe the serotonin receptors have a lot to do with spirituality), but my unique symptoms of some unknown mental illness neither my bipolar got better. THats what I thought at first, at least.

I started reading about demonic oppression yesterday as Ive become more and more spiritual for every ticing second, and symptom after symptom I checked as my heart started beating faster and my mouth turned wide open. I thought "Yeah... my mental illness, hallucinations and enviornment gets worser the more ignorant to love I get." As of late Ive been stealing a lot, and I remember how I somehow felt something dark taking more control of me the more sins I commit. No no, it's not delusion. It's reality. The power of this demon or whatever is really strong, as it can manipulate even the people... even weather around me. The scariest part is that this demon is quite violent. It enjoys seeing other people get hurt, and Ive found out because whenever I look at someone doing something that requires a lot of concentration, they may screw up. When people are walking upwards on the stairs and I take a quick glance at them, they may slip.

The more I tell people about this damned thing, the more this demon will later manipulate people to respond negativley to me. So Ill just stop right here and go on to the question. Have you ever been possessed? If so, how did it feel? Are you still possessed? Most importantly... what can I do about this damned evil thing. If you know, please help me out. Its been draining my energy and all potential ever since I was a little child, and Im F'N FED UP with it.

Thank you
 
well if you are possessed perhaps you need to cleanse your soul and stop feeding the demon within you. It thrives on misery and pain, do not give into it. If the demon wants to see others hurt then force feed it happiness and love. If you can negatively control parts of others lives then you can most certainly control them positively. If you are possessed God will protect you, open yourself up to the power of God; you can be saved.

i've felt like i've been possessed before, not so much by an evil demon but by God or Jesus Christ himself. I felt God's power flowing through me. It felt great, powerful, magical, like everything was connected. Perhaps for you the power is so great that you are seeing it in the wrong light, it can be used for good or evil, the choice is up to you. What can you do to change this? I'd seriously suggest seeking professional help, the demon is kept alive by underlying problems in your life, resolve these problems and there will be no food left for the demon and it will die. Good luck.
 
Meh, sounds like you're schizophrenic, sorry. I'm selfish, shallow, cruel, cold, heartless, sadistic.. whatever, but that's all me. I don't blame it on anything else.
 
you are delusional dog, u need to go back on your meds.

yes there is good and bad energy in this world. our human bodies are indeed supernatural. you are in yourself causing all of this and tainting your vessel by admitting to yourself that you are evil. if you believe it, you will be it. try to meditate for 10 mins and the delusions will be gone for that period(if you'd like u can see it as you aren't sending out any brain waves nor recieving any/not recieving or sending out any energy or spirit, whether it be good or bad), when you come out of it i want you to repeat these 2 mantras to yourself: I love myself and I wish everybody good health. It may feel silly at first but it will program your superconscious(or soul) to be good. Do this once every day, it's only 20 minutes out of your day
 
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OP how long were you on antipsychotics, which one(s), and what dose?

did you feel hyper-suggestible when you were reading about demonic possession?

someone close to me has synthetic cannabinoid induced schizophrenia. i've experienced minor schizophrenic symptoms due to benzodiazepine tapering. i know how easy it is to fall into that sort of delusion (the person close to me believes he is possessed). it's called losing your sense of agency.

see a therapist and psychiatrist. antipsychotics are crude drugs and often do not work and have side effects, but if you are doing things you aren't intending to do, you should try several antipsychotics until you find one that does. if you read the page for schizophrenia, you should be checking off each symptom there too... try not to jump to conclusions that will build panic.
try to meditate for 10 mins and the delusions will be gone for that period
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this depends. schizophrenia is quite an illness. you can think yourself sicker, and you can think yourself better (like you said, it depends on beliefs convictions morals etc). i wouldn't recommend meditation here, personally. (edit-visualizing meditation specifically)

those mantras are a good idea, though.
 
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Just do a simple test.
1) Get an exorcism
2) Get on medication
3) Find out which worked better.
 
Also um when checking into symptoms on any condition or illness it's really easy to misdiagnose yourself. Trust me as a psych major i've run into many paranoias(bipolar, schizofrenia, multiple personality disorder, autism, you name it) about the workings of my mind. Leave it up to the professionals to decide what's natural/normal and what's not
 
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I'm bipolar, not schizo. Can be quite similar in terms of symptoms, though. And I know how to differentiate the symptoms from what is not related, and in this case, what is not related is what I suspect to be evil spirits. The main reason is because it does indeed cause odd phenomena and has so far cause one paranormal activity.

And I have tried meditating several times the last months but always fail. Its supposed to feel comfortable, right? But I just get aches all over my body due to anxiety which disrupts my concentration on the breathing, so its impossible. No ways for me to relax except for the few minutes before falling asleep.
 
The vast majority of us here are not doctors. We are not qualified to diagnose you medically. Although I work with people with mental disorders I can say your described symptoms seem strikingly on to schizophrenia.Early childhood onset schizophrenia is a rare condition, so most people do not know they have schizophrenia untill they get older. As age increases into you teenage and adult years the chances of schizophrenia vastly increase to every 1 in a 100 adults. I suggest you go to a new doctor and psychiatrist and get another opinion. If that doesn't work then seek a church out and go talk to someone. They will not think negatively of you.
 
You have mental issues that imo go beyond bi-polar, like potentially a schizotypal personality disorder, or some type of schizophrenia. You need to seek some more mental health proffesionals.
 
qwe I totally agree with you I just didn't want to promote one church than another. Many different religions believen some type of demon possession. Do not get me wrong though, I think this is a medical issue more than a religiouse issue. This is based based on the symptoms described at the top of the post
 
BottleInABottle said:
I'm bipolar, not schizo. Can be quite similar in terms of symptoms, though. And I know how to differentiate the symptoms from what is not related, and in this case, what is not related is what I suspect to be evil spirits. The main reason is because it does indeed cause odd phenomena and has so far cause one paranormal activity.

And I have tried meditating several times the last months but always fail. Its supposed to feel comfortable, right? But I just get aches all over my body due to anxiety which disrupts my concentration on the breathing, so its impossible. No ways for me to relax except for the few minutes before falling asleep.
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If you think it's possible to be haunted by evil spirits, it's equally possible to attract holy spirits as well. It's your thoughts which will attract them, these evil spirits can't exist if you don't pay attention to them. Theoretically, I believe if you're completely occupying your vessel, there should be no room left over for evil to share your vessel with you. But then again i don't really believe in a soul or our body as a vessel for a soul. I believe our entire physical body/vessel is collectively what makes up our consciousness.

Also on meditation, yes it can be relaxing. Not so much for me, i use it as a tool to cleanse my mind of any and all thoughts. If you can't sit still and think of nothing, except for your breathing, then there's many other kinds of meditation to try out. You can just go about your daily routine, when you're doing the dishes repeat to yourself "I am cleaning, i am cleaning" or simply "I AM" or humm to yourself "OMMMMMMM" which represents the hum of the universe. I find it easier if i repeat to myself "i am" while i focus on my breathing, i invision the air as it inflates my lungs, i imagine oxygen being sent to every cell in my body, all the while i'm focusing on my current task. It's easier for me to do it this way because i have a.d.d. and it's hard to focus on just one thing for long.
 
Please don't read too much into my OPINION OP. I think you need to calm yourself down, carefully evaluate your position, and speak to someone who can help you.

Personally from what you've said I think you're struggling with your own demons rather than any external to yourself, that is you're struggling with your own mental creations as opposed to any nefarious independant demon. Your own mental creations can be just as damaging as any demon can be, they are the repeating habits and behaviours you express externally and internally which survive only through your attention to them. Now don't be frightened, everyone has them! People just hide it well under their socially excepted mask that's all! They have means and methods for expressing their needs and desires which don't go against the crowd, thus it is excepted and doesn't bother them or anyone else.

Possession, IMO, tends to be a lot more subtle than what you're describing and it is my belief that again a lot of people are inhabited by entities but it goes largely unnoticed by people. Rather than taking control of a person they interject thoughts into your mind to get you to do certain things, like expend energy on sex, drugs, certain food stuffs, or certain rituals of behaviour that ensure a follow up of expenditure of energy. (Why energy? Well, that's how parasites work, they want your energy or some kind of energy. The idea that "demons are evil and fuck with you for amusement" is a superstitious approach to the issue IMO, it is outdated.) The clever part is that nearly everyone excepts their thoughts as their own.. they seem to originate inside of you/your head and have "your voice", so the idea that some of these thoughts belong to something else seems absurd but it is my belief/opinion this is the case.

But again from what you describe and the way you write I believe you aren't possessed but you are troubled by your own mind. I'm suprised no one has mentioned this but you said you read something and then immediately jumped to the conclusion that you're possessed.. perhaps you should just calm down, take a deep breath, and realize that what you read on the first pass is probably NOT true. Reading something once and jumping to such a far reaching conclusion is not the result of careful evaluation but an overly paranoid mind. I'm not saying you couldn't be possessed based upon your own reasoning, but I suspect if you spend more time reading into the subject and expanding your understanding you would actually re-evaluate your position and realize that actually you're not possessed.
 
-=SS=- said:
Please don't read too much into my OPINION OP. I think you need to calm yourself down, carefully evaluate your position, and speak to someone who can help you.

Personally from what you've said I think you're struggling with your own demons rather than any external to yourself, that is you're struggling with your own mental creations as opposed to any nefarious independant demon. Your own mental creations can be just as damaging as any demon can be, they are the repeating habits and behaviours you express externally and internally which survive only through your attention to them. Now don't be frightened, everyone has them! People just hide it well under their socially excepted mask that's all! They have means and methods for expressing their needs and desires which don't go against the crowd, thus it is excepted and doesn't bother them or anyone else.

Possession, IMO, tends to be a lot more subtle than what you're describing and it is my belief that again a lot of people are inhabited by entities but it goes largely unnoticed by people. Rather than taking control of a person they interject thoughts into your mind to get you to do certain things, like expend energy on sex, drugs, certain food stuffs, or certain rituals of behaviour that ensure a follow up of expenditure of energy. (Why energy? Well, that's how parasites work, they want your energy or some kind of energy. The idea that "demons are evil and fuck with you for amusement" is a superstitious approach to the issue IMO, it is outdated.) The clever part is that nearly everyone excepts their thoughts as their own.. they seem to originate inside of you/your head and have "your voice", so the idea that some of these thoughts belong to something else seems absurd but it is my belief/opinion this is the case.

But again from what you describe and the way you write I believe you aren't possessed but you are troubled by your own mind. I'm suprised no one has mentioned this but you said you read something and then immediately jumped to the conclusion that you're possessed.. perhaps you should just calm down, take a deep breath, and realize that what you read on the first pass is probably NOT true. Reading something once and jumping to such a far reaching conclusion is not the result of careful evaluation but an overly paranoid mind. I'm not saying you couldn't be possessed based upon your own reasoning, but I suspect if you spend more time reading into the subject and expanding your understanding you would actually re-evaluate your position and realize that actually you're not possessed.
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I think your post makes the most sense, really. Im still unsure of wheter Im facing my inner demons, which is probably the most common, as it feels like something is forcing me into thinking something. Like if I have had a conversation with someone, I can think of a rude comment without even really having such feelings. It could be either tics or it could be something that is interjected. Ive had a lot of problems with this as I constantly need to repeat the same phrase over and over nowdays inside my head. Theres a possibility this may simply be tics, but theres the possibility its caused by something more spiritual. I'd be thankful if you're willing to give me some advice on how to get rid of this.

And... Well... the thing is I think people are way too quick to draw the conclusion Im schizophreniac, as I am not. I repeat... Im not schizophreniac. I have the ability to think rationally, and my "conclusions" are always jumping around and shifting zone, so my thoughts change really quickly. Which is more like a symptom of mania. I live AMONG schizophreniacs, as Im on something similar to drug rehab in an accomodate for people with various mental or drug abuse problems. So phoolaaeeze, no more "You are schizophrenic" posts. I already have a 9/10 doctor who knows what kind of tags hes giving to his patients.
 
BottleInABottle said:
I think your post makes the most sense, really. Im still unsure of wheter Im facing my inner demons, which is probably the most common, as it feels like something is forcing me into thinking something. Like if I have had a conversation with someone, I can think of a rude comment without even really having such feelings. It could be either tics or it could be something that is interjected. Ive had a lot of problems with this as I constantly need to repeat the same phrase over and over nowdays inside my head. Theres a possibility this may simply be tics, but theres the possibility its caused by something more spiritual. I'd be thankful if you're willing to give me some advice on how to get rid of this.
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Ah the thing about rude comments ^_^ I know I have a similar thing and I'm pretty sure most people do too. Incidentally I think the reason why people, yourself included, get all mixed up over their internal nature is because we can't see into each others heads/minds. If we were able to we could compare and see just how similar our mental functioning really is. But in regards to the "rude comments", for example: I love my mum and dad. But sometimes things they say or do really irritate me and I want to just walk away but I'm unable to for whatever reason, then I get a thought like "fuck's sake, this fucking retarded. how could you be so retarded!". That type of "rude thought" (or whatever else may come up) only becomes a problem when you see it as one.. I could panic and start accepting it as true, but it is just a thought, one which resulted from my inability to express how I really felt at the time. It's OK to have these thoughts, the trick is to not get caught up in them! Again they only become a big deal when you make it a big deal. Don't try or worry about stopping them either.. stopping thought is impossible.. you'll only make it more of a big deal by doing this! What I'm describing here is a form of meditation.. just watching your thoughts and not getting emotionally aroused by them.

As for repeating something over and over in your head, being stressed definitely triggers it for me and I know my best friend describes it the same way too. Again try not to make it a big deal. I think you just need to calm yourself down and try to relax a bit. Being surrounded by others who are suffering mental issues is probably not the best environment to be in.. ideally you want to be surrounded by "normal" people, and if you interact socialy you'll see that actually you're not crazy or possessed afterall.
 
From what your explaining it sounds really similiar to things my mom would say. She is very spritual and bi-polar. Another thing she would say that I think is very wise is that God helps those that help themselves and he/she gives us resources to do it. That being said we are getting to know more and more about the structure and chemical relations in our brains but that doesn't mean that we don't have other things affecting how we think or feel. I was also diagnosed bi-polar. I can't see where the idea of possession would be conforting because it would mean a possable end to having to deal mania/depression. Especially during manic periods of time where you say, do, or think things that you regret. I'm still working out how I want to care for myself and my bi polar. I think treating bi-polar or any mental condition is more than just medication, treatment, it's in your whole lifestyle. Including your spirtuality. Bi-Polar changes your process of thinking but sometimes can get you to something you can work with. I like the note of inner demons and I agree with the earlier post that everyone deals with them some can hide it better than others. What I've noticed that helps me has been taking a break from any mindbending altering chemical MDMA.LDS ect. journaling, and incoporating excerise, and I'm considering medication although I don't know still processing on that front. But it's helped me sometimes to take a step back from my thinking and thinking about how I got to that thought. Talking with people has helped me a lot because they always bring new ideas in and question things about how I reached certain conclusions. Well to the question you asked about demons. There is a lot we don't know about the world. I would like to believe that there is more to life than the physical realities of the everyday experiance. But I believe that what your describing sounds more like manic thoughts to me. Also I have a hard time meditating, it's hard to get my mind to shut up. But with practice I've gotten better at it. Also there are many methods to meditating that you can look up. I've found if I've excercised and done something that calms me down before trying to mediate I have more success. Well I wish you luck with everything and hopefully my experiances/thoughts are helpful.
 
Lost Ego said:
If you think it's possible to be haunted by evil spirits, it's equally possible to attract holy spirits as well. It's your thoughts which will attract them, these evil spirits can't exist if you don't pay attention to them. Theoretically, I believe if you're completely occupying your vessel, there should be no room left over for evil to share your vessel with you. But then again i don't really believe in a soul or our body as a vessel for a soul. I believe our entire physical body/vessel is collectively what makes up our consciousness.

Also on meditation, yes it can be relaxing. Not so much for me, i use it as a tool to cleanse my mind of any and all thoughts. If you can't sit still and think of nothing, except for your breathing, then there's many other kinds of meditation to try out. You can just go about your daily routine, when you're doing the dishes repeat to yourself "I am cleaning, i am cleaning" or simply "I AM" or humm to yourself "OMMMMMMM" which represents the hum of the universe. I find it easier if i repeat to myself "i am" while i focus on my breathing, i invision the air as it inflates my lungs, i imagine oxygen being sent to every cell in my body, all the while i'm focusing on my current task. It's easier for me to do it this way because i have a.d.d. and it's hard to focus on just one thing for long.
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About holy spirits, yeah, they're always around. I never mentioned about all the same numbers that I constantly hear or see, which I strongly believe are messages from them. I checked the numbers up and most are positive, that Im nearing the end of a life phase which will bring about a better one. Negative? It's the number 6, meaning I need more balance between my spiritual and materialistic life. I honestly have no idea what it means by that or what I can do about it..

You mentioned other forms of meditation... well I think this is an alternative meditation form. I happen to play the guitar sometimes and just sing a long (although I'm not exactly decent at singing) to chords, whatever that comes into my heart. Maybe even that is a form of meditation? I find it empties my mind as everything comes out from my heart, not head. Besides that it requires quite a lot of concentration so my breathing does of course become natural and all my tics disappear. The best part... its fun, makes me happy, its refreshing and I always feel better after having a short session.

I never thought of that, man. Thanks. I'll try this out way longer than I used to next time.

PS. I'm starting to doubt about the demons. I think my lifestyle is simply attracting negative energy which manifests itself as various conditions, such as tics, restlessness, restless leg syndrome, drowsiness and compulsive thoughts.
 
BottleInABottle said:
I'm bipolar, not schizo. Can be quite similar in terms of symptoms, though. And I know how to differentiate the symptoms from what is not related, and in this case, what is not related is what I suspect to be evil spirits. The main reason is because it does indeed cause odd phenomena and has so far cause one paranormal activity.

And I have tried meditating several times the last months but always fail. Its supposed to feel comfortable, right? But I just get aches all over my body due to anxiety which disrupts my concentration on the breathing, so its impossible. No ways for me to relax except for the few minutes before falling asleep.
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I like that you say this as a definitive.

I'm bipolar, not schizo.
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How is it that you know this for a fact, a 100% truth? You dont.

The thing about mental illness is that the diagnosis is based on analysis and effectively an educated "guess" by a trained medical practitioner.

I am diagnosed with - Bipolar, Chronic Anxiety, Panic Disorder, Sleep Disorder, Psychotic Disorder, Borderline Personality Disorder, Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, Poly-drug Dependency Disorder, Obsessive Compulsive Disorder.. The list goes on and on.

Just because a doctor tells you that *insert disorder here* is what what you suffer from, it isn't fact.

Each mind is perfectly unique and the fact is that we can't rule out that you are schizophrenic, bipolar, delusional or indeed possessed.

I don't believe in the possibility of outside sources taking control of a persons mind, body or soul but i'm not ruling it out as a very far distant possibility.

The only thing that we can say for certain is that you need serious mental help.
 
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