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Just a question

M

Melena

Greenlighter
Joined
Jan 8, 2018
Messages
43
Location
Midwest US
Does the "wanting" ever go away? Opiates have been a Pandora's box for me. Any help/insight appreciated.
 
Bump

Welcome Melana. <3

I'll leave this to better peeps on here but here is an academic PDF about monitoring cravings ( will not help with emotional stuff that you can talk about on here) but may help organise/monitor how you're doing; with regard to self management ( if you can tolerate the scientific lingo - may empower you more than what your docs do/do not tell you). https://benthamopen.com/contents/pdf/TOBSJ/TOBSJ-5-1.pdf


Good luck hun and hold tough for support.
 
I don't think they ever go away, but they do get alot more manageable. I still have cravings 3 years after quitting a daily morphine habit, but I don't really have any trouble abstaining, at this point it's really just a fleeting thought here and there.
 
Its all i think about (well not always but a lot). My use has gotten to the point that i am afraid i will overdose just trying to achieve the euphoria, yet i still want it. I suppose this is what addiction is. I cannot seek help IRL; not an option with my life/career. Every day a struggle.
 
If getting help isn't an option then is getting overdosed while chasing the dragon an option? Wouldn't that be harder for your life/career?

I guess most of those who have seeked out help have been thinking a long time that they can't seek help but are actually glad they seeked for help eventually and may even think what about if they seeked out help a way before.

Your life won't explode when you ask for help. I did and I am in much better shape now than I were before getting professional help for my addiction.
 
Some professions less forgiving than others. Plus if i lose my family and my job, i might as well OD.
 
The wanting never goes away completely but the volume gets turned down gradually over time I hear. I'm on maintenance so I can't comment with any certainty but that's what reliable people tell me. Is Suboxone or methadone an option
 
Melena said:
Does the "wanting" ever go away? Opiates have been a Pandora's box for me. Any help/insight appreciated.
Click to expand...

Yeah I've passed on heroin before, when it was free. I don't want opiates now. Took a long time.

Melena said:
Some professions less forgiving than others. Plus if i lose my family and my job, i might as well OD.
Click to expand...

You can get help before anything bad happens. How bad is the craving? Are you addicted/dependent? When's the last time you used?
 
Not sure how to answer about depth of craving. Last use last weekend; difficult to make it thru week (depends on work hours - better when i am not at home). I have been thru withdrawals. Addicted? Probably. Difficult to judge but based on what i have read here would seem so. Weekend coming up and will be difficult to abstain.
 
Vivitrol is probably what would be required. Not sure i could survive the professional embarassment that would go with that.
 
If you're in the U.S. methadone maintenance is covered under the Americans with disabilities act, companies can't fire or discriminate against you for it.
 
Certain professions complete abstinence is only option. This scares me; i cant imagine complete abstinence now ( though i lived a long time before ever taking an opiate, so of course this is possible). I never would have thought i would be in this position.
 
The cravings definitely aren't as intense or persistent once you make it past the acute withdrawal. There are things that you can do to diminish the cravings even more, but some of it may require a lifestyle change and isn't always practical. For instance, avoiding stress for the first few months might help reduce the risk of relapse, but isn't always possible.

There are more practical steps that can be taken. A lot of people report success with cognitive behavioral therapy, or just therapy, counseling and groups in general. Addressing some emotional issues can also help to reduce the urge to use.

But I don't think it ever really goes away completely. Hopefully I can get to a point where I'm not thinking about it that much. I can't say that I'm there yet, but I have definitely made a lot of progress.

Do they do random drug testing at your work?
 
Mafioso said:
The cravings definitely aren't as intense or persistent once you make it past the acute withdrawal. There are things that you can do to diminish the cravings even more, but some of it may require a lifestyle change and isn't always practical. For instance, avoiding stress for the first few months might help reduce the risk of relapse, but isn't always possible.

There are more practical steps that can be taken. A lot of people report success with cognitive behavioral therapy, or just therapy, counseling and groups in general. Addressing some emotional issues can also help to reduce the urge to use.

But I don't think it ever really goes away completely. Hopefully I can get to a point where I'm not thinking about it that much. I can't say that I'm there yet, but I have definitely made a lot of progress.

Do they do random drug testing at your work?
Click to expand...

I try to exercise, and i work a lot. Helps if i am not at home. But you have to go home eventually, especially if tou have a family. Probably why weekends hard - unless i can get out of town, sometime during those 64 hours i will come up with a really good reason to use and cannot argue myself out of it. And if its twice then i am dealing with withdrawl during the week (odd i know but i attribute that to dose). I just want to be in control again.
 
What's going on at home?

It's definitely a struggle. The mind is always coming up with excuses to get out of responsibility. Mine is anyways. I don't think that will ever go away, just need to come up with better reasons to stay sober and fulfill my duties.
 
I don't think "the wanting" ever really goes away (i'm 46 years old, first "wanted" when I was 14).

But you can try to figure out why it's there in the first place. And this might be a first step to understanding how to start to protect yourself.

For me knowledge was power. I found a doctor who helped me understand addiction. This didn't solve the problem but like I said, it was a first step. It helped me understand the triggers, specifically where they came from. And this took a lot of shame away from me. Which was a good first step.
 
Melena said:
DOC is at home. I need it legitimately for other things so cant just get rid of it.
Click to expand...
Is there someone who could dole out your medication for you, to help remove some of the temptation?

I'm about the same with cannabis, except I don't absolutely need it. I like having it around because it helps with some PTSD symptoms, but when I have it around then the temptation to get stoned all day comes back. I don't really get cravings after about a week of not smoking, so long as it's not around.
 
I have thought about having someone else handle my meds, but that would mean that person would have to know why. And i cant risk that. My family is very anti- recreational drugs; as i said before, if i reveal my problem to anyone i risk losing everything. I have been doing well - nothing in 4 days. Doesnt sound like much but its a start.
 
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