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Detox IV fentanyl withdrawal

Benjamin_uk2017 said:
Yeah thanks, feeling better every day. Just getting apitate back. I was on 75ml methadone cj. I tapered down to about 35 no problem, Easier than I thought it would be. Then i fast tapered to 10ish then jumped to subutex, that was pretty rough lol. Still not as bad as a proper heroin rattle tho
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Thanks for replying. I'm on 160 of methadone and trying to evaluate what my options are before I start trying to taper.
 
That's a lot lol, i would start tapering now, 2ml a week. I don't think you'll feel that. Honestly I didn't really feel it till 35ml. Toothpastedog wrote me a plan out that worked good. Swapping from methadone to codeine then subutex, from 20ml I fast tapered 1ml a day to 10ml then swapped to 300mg codiene in morning 300mg in afternoon, for a few days then went onto subutex. I got some 60mg codeine phosphate tablets, my detox was rough, but 10x easier than I thought it would be, it's a crazy feeling not being on methadone after years of being on it. Ive now got no opiets in my system and it's a great feeling mate. I just wish I'd done it earlier and not wasted so much time.
 
I often think about the insanity of no longer taking heroin or methadone daily :)

It is indeed a nice, albeit still kind of novel, experience. What really blows my mind is that after 3.5yrs after quitting is how I very, very rarely find my mind drifting towards thoughts about heroin use. And when I do, it's more about how I've suffered in connection with my heroin use - and never that more problematic kind of romanticization opioid users know so well.
 
toothpastedog said:
I often think about the insanity of no longer taking heroin or methadone daily :)

It is indeed a nice, albeit still kind of novel, experience. What really blows my mind is that after 3.5yrs after quitting is how I very, very rarely find my mind drifting towards thoughts about heroin use. And when I do, it's more about how I've suffered in connection with my heroin use - and never that more problematic kind of romanticization opioid users know so well.
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I still get both kinds of memories. Usually I don't think about heroin in my daily routine. When it comes up, the thoughts are--like you described--mostly amazement at how different my life is now and how awful those years were. But I gotta admit that at other times, I get blips of using fantasies. But I'm still in my first year since quitting. My hope is that over time, the fantasies will get less common.
 
toothpastedog said:
I often think about the insanity of no longer taking heroin or methadone daily :)

Am only 11days in and can't stop thinking about how I'm going to live my life from now on.
Like I said earlier, I wish I'd done it years ago, but I suppose you can't get clean till your really ready. It's like something in my brain has switched lol, and says enough is enough.
Im 33 now, hopefully I can sort my shit out and stay clean forever, live my life for me and not the gear! Only just realised I've only got 1 life, so im making to make the most of it from now on!
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You're at the ideal age to do this. Most people begin to rapidly age out of this kind of drug use around their late twenties to mid thirties.

I hope you can find a way to not worry to much about how you'll live the rest of your life. That is so heavy! I definitely felt like that for many years, but I don't think I'd have been able to get sober without making peace with where I was/am in life, even as unideal things were. It's all a process. If you can work on improving your health and getting involved in a community you feel a part of, you'll figure things out in ways that you probably couldn't even begin to imagine at present.

Finding supportive people who accept you for who you are (and whatever that means to YOU) will go a hell of a long way to helping you accept yourself, your process in all this and where you're at in life better than anything else I think. It's soooooo much easier to be sober when I feel like I am heard and acknowledged IRL, especially by people I respect and admire. Connection is the opposite of addiction, after all. And few connections are more liberating than with people who care about you for your own particular breed of authenticity.

So Ben, I'd love to hear more about your authentic interests, passions and interests in life. Would you mind sharing a bit about who you are? For instance, what are some of the things you have done that you are proud of, the kind of stuff that make you feel good about who you are when you reflect on them?
 
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So I'm going stir crazy waiting on this hurricane to get done tormenting us and having a hard time with cravings....been using a bag on occasion, here and there....shits REAL GOOD so I only do a half bag at a time (I love being a cheap date finally LOL) but I k ow I'm playing with fire....
 
Sober 5 days and I have got the worst cravings right now.. keeping me from sleeping.. ugh
 
It's nice to see you back here Zoe. I'd like to blame Irma for derailing my recovery but nothing "made" me use. It was a major disruption though. Hope you are feeling better.
 
Oh I wasn't blaming the hurricane I'm sorry if I came across that way...Hope you are doing well and have the power back on by now...still got folks down the road from my house without power up in N.FL...
Shit I just want to be able to sleep...Still waiting for my restless mind to quiet down...fuck
 
Oh no I didn't take it that way at all. Was only speaking for the excuses I've tried to manufacture for myself. I feel you on the sleep. Today was a day to sleep in and I couldn't do it. Even with alcohol I still had to take gabapentin and benzos to finally fall asleep. And now that I'm up I'm contemplating my anxiety and whether or not it's worth going and getting some beer in 30 minutes.

My power came back pretty quickly. Everyone I know finally has the lights on and life has returned to normal.
 
SHIT... spent another Xmas Eve (the lonely Jew on Christmas lol, love South Park) watching trainspotting.....that's what led me down the rabbit hole last time two yrs ago....thank God I passed (not nodded thank yo little baby Jesus) out before it was able to aptly fuck with me,.... watching my fav surf vid now, that always seems to help me relax
 
I’m back in Tennessee since the new music director at the catholic cathedral in downtown Orlando unhired all the musicians for midnight mass. Doing the Jewish thang and going to see All the Money in the World with two friends I went to high school with who are also back in town for the holidays.
 
No - went and had all you can eat soul food served family style. I only mildly overate this time. :)
 
Broccoli salad, green pea salad, corn pudding, green beans, turkey stuffing casserole, roasted potatoes and carrots and the second best fried chicken I’ve ever had in my life. Apple crumb pie for dessert. The fun thing about this place is you are seated at big tables with random people and you just pass everything around. And it was nice to visit with a former mentor who is now retired from the Nashville Symphony.

Orlando is far enough south that it’s north. We don’t have soul food on that level anymore (used to).
 
Okay I just spent quite some time typing my heart out about how I spent my Christmas and while trying to edit my phone's censorship of a curse word I accidentally deleted it somehow could one of the Mods plz be kind enough to restore it for me? I would really appreciate that
 
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