What's up. I'm 20 years old and started abusing painkillers in high school at 17. I began with Vic's, then percs, morphine, OP, etc all through out 11-12th grade. I would say my tolerance mid way through was 90mg of morphine. 4,000mg's Percocet. Throughout that time I was clean for maybe a month until I started up again. Also, I partied a lot and drank alcohol, did cocaine for a few months and quit that, and a small habit of Xanax recreationally. The whole time I always did opiates besides that 1 month sober. Started smoking weed for a year until I quit and got caught up with heroin. I had sniffed it for roughly 8-9 months before nearly turning 20. Here I am now.. Booting it up almost everyday for the last 7 months. I went into a rehab which I left after a week and relapsed. In 5 days, I go to a methadone clinic for help. I'm sick and tired and lying, stealing, selling my shit to get the next fix. I am trying to turn my life around and when I don't have H, the withdrawals are horrible. The question is.. Is a methadone clinic a good choice for a person like me after all the information I gave? My mind says yes, but my heart says 50/50. Maybe bc I'm uneducated? I know about suboxne and all that. I'd prefer methadone if anything. Thoughts on this please guys? Any and all advice/opinion would be highly appreciated.. Help homies����??
Your situation sound familiar to almost every drug addict, and I assure you, methadone is a trap, a fancy FDA approved trap put in place to keep the addicts DOWN.
1. Methadone is quite poisonus, compared to true Opiates, like morphine, and oxy (you should look into a CWE for fucksake 4,000 mg isn't OXYCODONE, it's the incredibly toxic TYLENOL, there may only be 40mg of Oxycodone in that).
2. Are you truly addicted? If you still experience a "nod" i'd say no. WHY? because that's a sign your tolerance is still manageable AND that you use 100% recreationally. Meanin YOU DON'T RELY ON OPIATES FOR MOTIVATION! That's important, once you use them for motivation, etc.. your fucked.
3. Are you prepared to spend all the money on Methadone (clinics cost lotsa $$) that you could be using for a fix??
4. Do you really NEED drugs to live at this point?? Sounds like you don't and you know it.
Perhaps your just scared of withdrawal??
Well let me tell you 7 days-1 month of withdrawal sure beats the shit out of that Cold iron ball & chain they call "methadone", and i'm not even on the stuff, I chose to stick with SHORT ACTING OPIATES recently, and i'm sure glad I did.
THis way I KNOW I can still quit if I really want to...there's really no quitting methadone for most people, though a small % do actually quit methadone, and live happily ever after to tell about it, the majority don't and probably end up wishing they just stuck with Heroin or would of Manned the fuck up and went through 7 days of withdrawal!
IMHO, your best shot is to just MAN UP AND PUT YOURSELF THROUGH WITHDRAWAL!
Taper down with hydros etc..., and stop thinking about being "HIGH" think about functioning. Because I gaurentee you 100% without the shadow of a doubt, If you keep using opiates to get "high" you're going to end up so fucked you'll just wish you were dead, when youre 70 years old and nothing, I do mean NOTHING will even touch, muchless relieve, your pain as you lay dying, suffering all the while.
But what do I know?
