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Is it wierd that...

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Lost Ego

Lost Ego

Bluelighter
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Jun 11, 2009
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Californiaaa
Is it wierd that at the age of 19, i have the next 10 years of my life mapped out?

Phase one (ideally shouldn't take longer than 1 more year): The enjoyment phase. I prepare for phases 2 and 3. Figure out wtf i want, what i love, what i enjoy doing, what i think my purpose in life is. I attend college in this phase and obtain as much knowledge as i can. My plan so far has been to live with as many people as a can(parents, aunts, uncles, friends) and learn as much as i can from them. I figure out how the world works. I aquire skills i can use in phases 2 and 3. I already found that i thoroughly enjoy kung fu as a hobby and its a great skill to have in stage 3 - defend/protect the family. I get in shape and become the man i've always wanted to be - physically + mentally. I find women who i would ideally like to marry (done, now i just need money to take her out and woo them - women love money lolol). I dont date the girl of my dreams in this phase, i just have lots of meaningless sex. I do plenty of drugs and exploring of my mind.

Phase two (ideally takes place from when im 21-25): Entering society. In this phase i do drugs hardly ever and when i do it's recreational. I enter the job field. Right now i think my best option is to enter the air force and learn a trade (i got an 88 on my asvabs so i should be able to do whatever field i want). While in the military for 4 years i want to continue my education, i will be a computer programmer/intelligence analyst in this phase and will already have a job so the education is simply to form something to fall back on and continue learning about the psych, philosophy, drugs and society (things im currently very interested in) - the military will pay for 70,000 in schooling :). I begin getting paid and begin courting the woman of my dreams. If things fall out with the woman of my dreams i continue traveling the world and i woo random women and hopefully if there's a god he'll send this dog a sweet bone.

Phase three (age 27-33): The big change. I get out of the military, i continue courting the girl of my dreams, i get my masters in psychology/math. I'm not sure what i want my career to be exactly - psychopharm is appealing, math professor is too, anything working with google, something in physics/cia is intriguing, maybe a doctor or psychologist -> really dno yet. Money isn't the most important thing in this phase, job doesnt have to be based on money, but this phase does indeed require it so i do need some sort of job. I plan to get marryed and have kids in this phase. I already have found 2 women whom i'd love to marry - one is my crush from middle school, the other is a close friend of mine, they are both interested in me currently. I get marryed and have kids, my life slows down, i live my life vicariously through my son xD and enjoy the time i have with my wife.

That's the plan, the only things that can screw it up is 1) jail time, 2) a baby, 3) suicide, 4) major disaster. I try not to get caught doing stupid shit, i try to always wear a condom, i've talked myself out of suicide as an option, and if a nuke is dropped/huge california earthquake then fuck everything, dgaf to the max.
 
relationships aren't simple, you don't just meet the girl of your dreams and live happily forever.
 
Lost Ego said:
Is it wierd that at the age of 19, i have the next 10 years of my life mapped out?

Phase one (ideally shouldn't take longer than 1 more year): The enjoyment phase. I prepare for phases 2 and 3. Figure out wtf i want, what i love, what i enjoy doing, what i think my purpose in life is. I attend college in this phase and obtain as much knowledge as i can. My plan so far has been to live with as many people as a can(parents, aunts, uncles, friends) and learn as much as i can from them. I figure out how the world works. I aquire skills i can use in phases 2 and 3. I already found that i thoroughly enjoy kung fu as a hobby and its a great skill to have in stage 3 - defend/protect the family. I get in shape and become the man i've always wanted to be - physically + mentally. I find women who i would ideally like to marry (done, now i just need money to take her out and woo them - women love money lolol). I dont date the girl of my dreams in this phase, i just have lots of meaningless sex. I do plenty of drugs and exploring of my mind.

Phase two (ideally takes place from when im 21-25): Entering society. In this phase i do drugs hardly ever and when i do it's recreational. I enter the job field. Right now i think my best option is to enter the air force and learn a trade (i got an 88 on my asvabs so i should be able to do whatever field i want). While in the military for 4 years i want to continue my education, i will be a computer programmer/intelligence analyst in this phase and will already have a job so the education is simply to form something to fall back on and continue learning about the psych, philosophy, drugs and society (things im currently very interested in) - the military will pay for 70,000 in schooling :). I begin getting paid and begin courting the woman of my dreams. If things fall out with the woman of my dreams i continue traveling the world and i woo random women and hopefully if there's a god he'll send this dog a sweet bone.

Phase three (age 27-33): The big change. I get out of the military, i continue courting the girl of my dreams, i get my masters in psychology/math. I'm not sure what i want my career to be exactly - psychopharm is appealing, math professor is too, anything working with google, something in physics/cia is intriguing, maybe a doctor or psychologist -> really dno yet. Money isn't the most important thing in this phase, job doesnt have to be based on money, but this phase does indeed require it so i do need some sort of job. I plan to get marryed and have kids in this phase. I already have found 2 women whom i'd love to marry - one is my crush from middle school, the other is a close friend of mine, they are both interested in me currently. I get marryed and have kids, my life slows down, i live my life vicariously through my son xD and enjoy the time i have with my wife.

That's the plan, the only things that can screw it up is 1) jail time, 2) a baby, 3) suicide, 4) major disaster. I try not to get caught doing stupid shit, i try to always wear a condom, i've talked myself out of suicide as an option, and if a nuke is dropped/huge california earthquake then fuck everything, dgaf to the max.
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It's not weird, that's just what normally happens. What happens in between is what you make of it. Good luck.
 
It's a good trait to have goals and plans as long as you can roll with it when it doesn't go exactly as you planned because 90% it won't go *exactly* as you plan and in the end I think that's a good thing. :)
 
yes im quite aware. i have many back up plans, this is just the most viable plan. either way in about 1-2 years ima gonna attain a trade - whether that be massage, electrical, finish my bachellors, or even start working at mcdonalds and work on one of the 3 if necessary. in 6-11 years im gonna start trying to settle down - it doesnt matter who with. and i do think it's possible to find a woman and live happily ever after, idgaf if we get married either, i do want kids though. i figure if i have an idea where im going i can focus on today.
 
It's pretty tough to plan relationships like this because it's not entirely up to you whether those succeed or fail. I applaud the rest of the shit tho because I'm a fellow life-planner. I made my first goals list when I was just past 20 having realized the dark place my life was going to otherwise. It felt good to have something written on a page to tell me what I had to do and it gave me a lot of confidence to see through all that I had planned. It was near the end of 2011 when I finally reached my last goal on that list and I felt truly in control for once in my life, holding that page from years ago and reading it saying 'this is where I'll be at this point in time' and looking up from it to realize that I got to precisely where I planned to be.

I'm on my second list now and working toward the goals that will see me into my mid-30s after which I hope to start thinking about a family myself. Whatever you do, don't lose that list! Write it out and post it on your wall and make copies and fucking put it everywhere imagineable to boost your confidence and get you through it all. Ten years is a bit of a stretch for making commitments but really the key to seeing it all through is to make every goal on your list as clear and simple as possible so you can look at it any time and quickly remember why you're doing what you're doing when you feel lost.

Good luck!!
 
The Secret? You mean that book that apparently brainwashed a bunch of people? I haven't read it but if it's encouraging a similar concept than I guess there might be something useful in it.

If you're lax enough to forget about your dreams for a year then you're just shooting yourself in the foot. Life is short, don't waste time! If your intention is to use this time now to prepare for Phase 2, then write a list to get you from here to there detailing what you intend to do to make your transition into Phase 2 easy. You can't just say "well, i'm gonna fuck around now and learn some skills then bust my ass when the time comes" because you can end up delaying your own future for no reason.

"I wanna do kung-fu" ain't a goal, it's a pass-time. "I'm going to earn a certification in kung-fu by <this date>" is a goal; it's quantifiable and therefore you know exactly whether you succeeded or failed.

To reiterate: don't waste time. You have a year off? Start something that takes a year to complete. It'll make the transition to Phase 2 a lot easier than if you're just half-assedly fucking about and "discovering yourself". Self-discovery is a lifelong objective so there's no way you'd have that accomlished in one year anyway.
 
^ such good advice.

to the op, there's no point setting goals over which you don't have complete control. having a goal to settle down with anybody, no matter who it is, is still not a very well thought out goal because there's somebody else involved and you may not find somebody who wants to settle down with you. aside, having a goal to settle down with just anybody seems a little odd in and of itself.

alasdair
 
I'm definitely not a life planner. I take things one day at a time and since life has been throwing some curve balls at me lately, I can't exactly plan shit out.

I'm not goal oriented because Hell, you never know when you might suddenly be UNable to do those things you put on your "goal list". If you get into a bad car accident, BAM, the air force is out of the question.

Also, you're not "the man you've always wanted to be" by the age of 21. No way, no how. If you think you're just automatically going to be super spectacular awesome, then you have another thing coming to you. Learning continues to happen, whether you're inflating your ego or not.
 
thujone said:
The Secret? You mean that book that apparently brainwashed a bunch of people? I haven't read it but if it's encouraging a similar concept than I guess there might be something useful in it.

If you're lax enough to forget about your dreams for a year then you're just shooting yourself in the foot. Life is short, don't waste time! If your intention is to use this time now to prepare for Phase 2, then write a list to get you from here to there detailing what you intend to do to make your transition into Phase 2 easy. You can't just say "well, i'm gonna fuck around now and learn some skills then bust my ass when the time comes" because you can end up delaying your own future for no reason.

"I wanna do kung-fu" ain't a goal, it's a pass-time. "I'm going to earn a certification in kung-fu by <this date>" is a goal; it's quantifiable and therefore you know exactly whether you succeeded or failed.

To reiterate: don't waste time. You have a year off? Start something that takes a year to complete. It'll make the transition to Phase 2 a lot easier than if you're just half-assedly fucking about and "discovering yourself". Self-discovery is a lifelong objective so there's no way you'd have that accomlished in one year anyway.
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I'm not gonna intentionally forget, i just know myself well enough to know that i probably will.

Maybe it is just an excuse to fuck off for a year or 2 or 3. Or maybe i just wasn't being specific caus it woulda taken longer to write. Either way you are more than right. My plan is well [with my g.e.d. i need 15 college credits to enter the military] to get 15 credits and do whatever i want at around that time. I should have been done with my credits by now but shit happens and ill finish em in the fall and then enter about 9 months afterwards. In kung fu i want to surpass my cousin who has been doing it for much longer than me, this is more of a lifetime goal though. Idk if that's a better or not... Thanks for the good advice
alasdairm said:
^ such good advice.

to the op, there's no point setting goals over which you don't have complete control. having a goal to settle down with anybody, no matter who it is, is still not a very well thought out goal because there's somebody else involved and you may not find somebody who wants to settle down with you. aside, having a goal to settle down with just anybody seems a little odd in and of itself.

alasdair
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yeah alasdair, im quite aware but thats just the plan. i could rephrase and say ill attempt to try and find someone to settle down with at this point. more than likely i'll find someone before this point and if i do i'll propose at this phase(if it's that time). i do believe its possible to have a fairy tale ending


Simply_Live said:
Also, you're not "the man you've always wanted to be" by the age of 21. No way, no how. If you think you're just automatically going to be super spectacular awesome, then you have another thing coming to you. Learning continues to happen, whether you're inflating your ego or not.
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I dont think it's an inflation of my ego. For the longest time i fucking hated myself, i wanted to fucking die. For a while i hated god for screwing me over and then all of a sudden i decisively became at peace with all this shit. I grew up all at once (and im 19 not 21) and i realized i was a man, and as boy thats all u want, and i was too pre-occupied with my day to day stuggles that i didnt even notice. for so long i was wishing i could live by these morals or those morals, i was wishing i was handsome, i was wishing i wasn't so shy, i was wishing i was more like my older brother or my dad, i was wishing i could be at peace with certain issues, i was wishing i was responsible and someone to rely on... and suddenly i was, i didnt realize it but wishing was like making a choice thats completely within my hands and putting it in someone else's hands. i always wanted to be that guy who goes out with 10's (girls that we'd all rate 10/10) and suddenly i was having sex with some.

If u dont wanna call it spontaneous maturity then dont, let's just say i blossomed like a flower or went through a transformation due to experiencing hardships and pain. Or maybe i didnt change at all and maybe i just realized who i was
 
To be honest, it is a little weird... that you would turn to Bluelighters as judges of whether you have developed a sound and sensible life plan.
 
Lost Ego said:
I dont think it's an inflation of my ego. For the longest time i fucking hated myself, i wanted to fucking die. For a while i hated god for screwing me over and then all of a sudden i decisively became at peace with all this shit. I grew up all at once (and im 19 not 21) and i realized i was a man, and as boy thats all u want, and i was too pre-occupied with my day to day stuggles that i didnt even notice. for so long i was wishing i could live by these morals or those morals, i was wishing i was handsome, i was wishing i wasn't so shy, i was wishing i was more like my older brother or my dad, i was wishing i could be at peace with certain issues, i was wishing i was responsible and someone to rely on... and suddenly i was, i didnt realize it but wishing was like making a choice thats completely within my hands and putting it in someone else's hands. i always wanted to be that guy who goes out with 10's (girls that we'd all rate 10/10) and suddenly i was having sex with some.

If u dont wanna call it spontaneous maturity then dont, let's just say i blossomed like a flower or went through a transformation due to experiencing hardships and pain. Or maybe i didnt change at all and maybe i just realized who i was
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I appreciate the clarification. I'm glad you found yourself.
 
Benefit said:
To be honest, it is a little weird... that you would turn to Bluelighters as judges of whether you have developed a sound and sensible life plan.
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Me too. I lack a support group lol.

AmorRoark said:
Congrats on your development but what's your question in/purpose of this thread?
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Idk, i dont think there is a point anymore. there isn't a purpose to anything
 
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