Pretty much another selective depressing year for the holidays for me. . . Decisions made. .
Constant debate here of if i should move again, I dont like the comments that are being made nor the actions that are being taken place.
Pretty sad considering the situations at hand, and things just are not going the way I expected . . as anything in life.
I keep telling myself to just go with the flow or live in the moment and all in all is fine but then . . . at the same time there are things that need fixing, and possibly this is the place to get some stuff fixed then continue. .. at the same time "damage is already done" comments and proof of actions from other people is APPARENT, <-- is it a race against time and they're views, where i would have a better chance somewhere else where peoples views are not so judgmental or narrow minded/non understanding, just assuming. . . .
The mind just wonders, I feel with the current situation it is really pushed my limits of depression and anxiety to never before. I no longer or it has been a while that I have been hyper or felt good or even slept in a bed. I think the whole time in the currently location I have only slept in like a bed not my own four separate occasions. <-- just making a data statement not complaining. . Rambles .
the two past years just are the two years of hell . . There has been some fun also but nothing like the past.
Chasing dreams . . . .
So many dreams lately wondering if they are real or not real. . the fight to wake so i can realize if they are real or not is becoming odd.
Constant debate here of if i should move again, I dont like the comments that are being made nor the actions that are being taken place.
Pretty sad considering the situations at hand, and things just are not going the way I expected . . as anything in life.
I keep telling myself to just go with the flow or live in the moment and all in all is fine but then . . . at the same time there are things that need fixing, and possibly this is the place to get some stuff fixed then continue. .. at the same time "damage is already done" comments and proof of actions from other people is APPARENT, <-- is it a race against time and they're views, where i would have a better chance somewhere else where peoples views are not so judgmental or narrow minded/non understanding, just assuming. . . .
The mind just wonders, I feel with the current situation it is really pushed my limits of depression and anxiety to never before. I no longer or it has been a while that I have been hyper or felt good or even slept in a bed. I think the whole time in the currently location I have only slept in like a bed not my own four separate occasions. <-- just making a data statement not complaining. . Rambles .
the two past years just are the two years of hell . . There has been some fun also but nothing like the past.
Chasing dreams . . . .
So many dreams lately wondering if they are real or not real. . the fight to wake so i can realize if they are real or not is becoming odd.