Pyro
Bluelighter
Here's a little something I thought up in chat one day when I was bored. I wanted to write something and I ended up writing something quite nice. I think it's a rambling of a psycadelic mind... musings of a space-cadet.
care to join me? Then read it.
---------------
I revert to a time of distant pleasures. Long forgotten, manipulated by this moments expectations and damaged memory. I become all that I was inside that moment. I relive it, I become that beast yet again and grasp that feeling...
that ever unravels through my fingers. unraveling through my fingers and falling by my feet. I step in all that it was, trying to absorb it but my feet are now too hard and cracked to absorbe even the slightest drop. I am the beast yet again. Then the puddle floats up into the air, goes through my eyes, out my mouth and onto my hand, unraveling through my fingers yet again. Trying to stop the loop I lay down and pretend to die. I am naked like a child as I am instantly transported back to the first house I ever lived in. It is now everything that it never was in the past. Manipulated by my present self and my own definitions of reality. Unable to fully accept that I once lived in a place such as this, that my parents once strove so hard to even get me food. The vision disapates and I lay once again on the ground near the puddle... it enters my eyes and comes out my mouth but this time I do not try to catch it, but it rolls down my face and then my neck and down my arm and enters my hand... I hold it in front of me and it slips through my fingers. Up in the trees I examine the unfolding beauty of nature. The leaf connects to the branch, which connects to the tree, which connects to the ground... and I long to be a part of it. It is the stunning personification of the act of dying when I plunge my fingers into the earth And the dirt and the grasses and weeds and fallen leaves come and wrap me up into their system and I become one with nature as I am brought beneath the surface. But further I go, downward. Soon there is no more earth, just darkness. I move about freely in this empty space and realize that I can see myself, but there is nothing else to see, just nothing. I embody the idea of emptiness... then I see the hellfire. It is Satan, whos face quickly changes to the face of Jesus. As he come to embrase me in a sweet fire and embrase. He calls me his son and asks me to sit with him. I have no choice so I sit with him and he tells me I am dead. I explain that I didnt take anything that would kill me, and that I am alive... I should not be dead. But the devil calls his demons over to where we sit and they show me glimpses of hell and the lake of fire. I do not conceed that I am dead, I do not believe it and I yank myself out of his devilish deception. I asscend this time, back up through the emptiness, out of the hell and into the earth. And through the grasses I emmerge and become an ape, doomed to start the evolution process yet again. I do not want this. I do not want to be prime and early. I am a human being... I think I remember being a human. I... I am unsure at this point. Reality has been twisted to an extreme where I do not remember if I started here or if this is where I end or... or am I dead? I look at my hands and then I see myself standing there as the beast... I am that thing? I am this ape, this dead creature? The ape who is me screams and bangs on his chest and he begins to slober and spit and flail wildly about. It is me... that is my frustration. and I am forced to watch the spit fall to the ground and I am suddenly taken back to a place where I was laying down... looking at a puddle of water.
Pyro - Tim
------------------
I don't want to have a signature anymore.
care to join me? Then read it.
---------------
I revert to a time of distant pleasures. Long forgotten, manipulated by this moments expectations and damaged memory. I become all that I was inside that moment. I relive it, I become that beast yet again and grasp that feeling...
that ever unravels through my fingers. unraveling through my fingers and falling by my feet. I step in all that it was, trying to absorb it but my feet are now too hard and cracked to absorbe even the slightest drop. I am the beast yet again. Then the puddle floats up into the air, goes through my eyes, out my mouth and onto my hand, unraveling through my fingers yet again. Trying to stop the loop I lay down and pretend to die. I am naked like a child as I am instantly transported back to the first house I ever lived in. It is now everything that it never was in the past. Manipulated by my present self and my own definitions of reality. Unable to fully accept that I once lived in a place such as this, that my parents once strove so hard to even get me food. The vision disapates and I lay once again on the ground near the puddle... it enters my eyes and comes out my mouth but this time I do not try to catch it, but it rolls down my face and then my neck and down my arm and enters my hand... I hold it in front of me and it slips through my fingers. Up in the trees I examine the unfolding beauty of nature. The leaf connects to the branch, which connects to the tree, which connects to the ground... and I long to be a part of it. It is the stunning personification of the act of dying when I plunge my fingers into the earth And the dirt and the grasses and weeds and fallen leaves come and wrap me up into their system and I become one with nature as I am brought beneath the surface. But further I go, downward. Soon there is no more earth, just darkness. I move about freely in this empty space and realize that I can see myself, but there is nothing else to see, just nothing. I embody the idea of emptiness... then I see the hellfire. It is Satan, whos face quickly changes to the face of Jesus. As he come to embrase me in a sweet fire and embrase. He calls me his son and asks me to sit with him. I have no choice so I sit with him and he tells me I am dead. I explain that I didnt take anything that would kill me, and that I am alive... I should not be dead. But the devil calls his demons over to where we sit and they show me glimpses of hell and the lake of fire. I do not conceed that I am dead, I do not believe it and I yank myself out of his devilish deception. I asscend this time, back up through the emptiness, out of the hell and into the earth. And through the grasses I emmerge and become an ape, doomed to start the evolution process yet again. I do not want this. I do not want to be prime and early. I am a human being... I think I remember being a human. I... I am unsure at this point. Reality has been twisted to an extreme where I do not remember if I started here or if this is where I end or... or am I dead? I look at my hands and then I see myself standing there as the beast... I am that thing? I am this ape, this dead creature? The ape who is me screams and bangs on his chest and he begins to slober and spit and flail wildly about. It is me... that is my frustration. and I am forced to watch the spit fall to the ground and I am suddenly taken back to a place where I was laying down... looking at a puddle of water.
Pyro - Tim
------------------
I don't want to have a signature anymore.
