1) How many times have you been hospitalized for mental issues?
just once
2) What were you hospitalized for?
i had been hypomanic for weeks and it had built to mania after i took 100ug of lsd, i then thought that a user from this site was coming from california to kill me in a jet, and i was going to be assassinated within 4-6 hours. i also thought everyone who had a weak mind could be used to spy on me, extremely paranoid thoughts. i was sitting down in the middle of a big park (in my head the safest place i could be), and i saw an old lady, she was my archetype of wisdom/kindness, i told her what i was afraid of, told her that my body was telling me i was going to die. she walked me to the hospital which was near by, bought me a bottle of water, told me about her husband who used to have depression, was really nice. we walked past a cop car on the way and i asked her if i should see if they could help me and she was like 'nooo i dont think so'.
in hospital i started having what appeared to me to be psychic experiences, doing tibetan chanting, doing pranayama where i take really long breaths and bring it into my stomach, reading minds, telepathy, weeird stuff. in my head there was a big conspiracy that the mental health unit or wherever in the hospital i was, was actually the physical translation of bluelight.org everyone who i saw.. i was playing a game where i could figure out who that person posted as on BL. my mind was moving incredibly fast so it was like i was constructing an amazing movie script and i was living in the world, the most amazing drama. i had a delusion that my dad was 'papasomi' from the lounge, and he was part of the evil faction of BL, who were trying to have me assassinated, of course this ties in with the messiah complex i had also been experiencing where i thought i could create art so beautiful it would create peace in syria, the conflict between palestine and israel. anyway i was sick of my dad (papasomi) being within 5 metres of me (for a long time), i knew with him there i was sure to be killed at any moment. i telepathically communicated to the security outside my room that i was going to fake attack my dad. i then pretended to assault my dad, i am 99% sure i caused him no physical harm. i was then involuntary committed to the psychiatric closed ward facility. with the 9 other craziest people in my state.
3) How long were you in there?
2 weeks in closed ward, about a month in open ward.
4) Describe your experience -- was it good or bad? did you get anything out of it? what kinds of people were you surrounded with? Did you make any long-lasting friends while in the hospital?
i think i woke up in closed ward, they must have drugged me with a lot of tranquillisers, the weirdest thing happened though. about 2 years prior, i lost my virginity to a random 35 yr old woman i met on craigslist. i was 19 or something then and was desperate to have sex, considering my personality makes it difficult to form real life connections. that same woman went crazy at the same time as i did, and we formed an incredibly close friendship/relationship whilst locked up. she used to stare into the sun, and i would tell her its not good for her eyes, could she please stop. i think she liked that i cared about her wellbeing, she told me i think that she was heavily into wicca or occult/magick. i thought that she might have manifested me into her reality again through casting spells through ritual or something. i thought that she could see through a certain kind of bird that was often around the outside courtyard.
my mind during this time felt like i was thinking so fast that i had no thoughts if that makes sense. it was incredibly uncomfortable having this enormous nervous energy for which there was no outlet, i was in a cage. there was a girl who seemed like she was narcissistic/addicted to sex or something because i always felt like she was trying to seduce me. there was a guy who wore all grey tracksuit and seemed to be very depressed, but he was very kind. i didn't mention this but i didn't really understand why i was institutionalised in the first place, i felt like i had caused nobody else any harm, i thought maybe i was being punished by the state because i have overdosed multiple times before this and ended up in hospital a few times. nobody really talked to me as a human being, and let me know what was going on, i was just dropped into this chaotic scenario and left there like a rat in a scientists experiment.
we were observed while we took our mood stabiliser/anti psychotic, and we would get a benzodiazepine like diazepam or something if we asked for it i think. i was always trying to get benzos off the nurses because i needed something to slow my thoughts, i felt like my mind was an uncontrollable beast which i had no chance of facing.
5) How old were you at the time?
i was 21
6) How did your family/friends react to you being hospitalized? Were they complete a-holes or were they supportive?
i had visits with family and friends while i was in closed and open ward, i loved seeing people from the outside, and i always implored with them to bring me fast food/munchies in general. i think its olanzapine which made me have an endless hunger and made all food taste like sexy heaven to me, it was like munchies from weed x10. i heard from my brother after, who i used to be really close with, that he thought that i wasn't going to come back to reality, he thought maybe i was just going to be mad now. after the experience family were supportive because we trialled something called 'open-dialogue', a way for families to communicate and have dialogue after a member goes through psychosis, a way to explore where communication lines are breaking down, what is happening with the environment etc. it was originated in finland or sweden i believe and has very goo d results based on studies i have read.
something that struck me was that it was almost like it hadn't happened after. nobody really wanted to ask me about what had happened, i think people were wary of me after, and perhaps thought that it had been such an ordeal i wouldn't' want to talk about it. its also possible i am not close to many people, so that could be why i felt like that.
in terms of real spiritual analogy and psychosis.
i think psychosis is like having seen the ultimate truth of reality, and taking your ego with you on the trip. 'you' are god/going to save the world, but there is still separation, which comes to form through paranoia, other people are out to get you.
the experience ultimately helped me to grow as a person, suffering is the thing that helps to form and shape us. like herbavore i felt horrorstricken about how we treat the mentally sick, compelled to try and help, but still don't know how i can apply myself positively.
i could write a book in the future about the experience probably, i met some true characters in the psych ward.
) and another for a MELATONIN OVERDOSE. which I thought would never end me up in the hospital since melatonin is so harmless. I made a really good friend in there once, her name was Brandy.. we actually developed a huge crush on one another but I'm not in contact with her anymore. I've suffered from severe depression since I was 12 years old, and I have horrible anxiety. 
The last time I did it the doc said I better quit thinking this was the Hyatt or I would get committed one day.
