Inability to feel emotionally about anyone

[Pagey]

Uni's a huge change in life and you know, I wouldn't be surprised if a lot of people around you secretly feel rather similarly and are doing their very best to hide it. I know that's certainly how I felt throughout my whole first year at uni, and it's only now that I'm well into my second and comfortable in my environment that I'm developing genuine relationships with people. I've spoken to a bunch of friends about it and a lot have admitted to having similar feelings last year.
I think it's also probably really important that you not box yourself into this category - as in don't tell yourself that this is how you are, because if you tell yourself that, then it'll definitely make you like that. Sometimes the best way to get out of a situation or emotion that's bothering us is by convincing ourselves that it's not necessarily completely there, or that it doesn't have to be indefinitely.

And as others have said, the drugs have definitely got a huge part to play in this...I'd waver a strong guess that just a couple weeks entirely off weed would leave you starting to feel completely differently about others.

Best of luck, I hope things get better.

 

[-=SS=-]

life is full of contrived situations and that doesn't change as you get older.

decent friends are rare but if you meet a lot of people over your life you give yourself more opportunities to find friends.

for me the single most important thing that friends share is a sense of humour

+1

OP, I think as others have said a break from the hash use would do you well. Give yourself at least 6 months, maybe a year, to get fully back up to speed. It took me about that long to feel "normal" again from cannabis use. Hash/cannabis will magnify your underlying feelings, and I think you're have totally legitimate feelings about relationships with other people.. but you're young and you should ideally be sober enough to integrate your musings on relationships. Cannabis use prevents that some how, or being high constantly on anything does maybe.

A lot of relationships and social stuff is contrived, and a bit hollow. Small talk makes me anxious too. Part of the solution is to not take it so seriously.. people are just like you are, a bit lost and not really knowing exactly what is going on here on this planet, and trying to make the best of a situation. If you talk to people you will find others who feel like you do!

 

[MrSpeedyG]

Try MDMA.

Second that.

 

[Gloop]

Try MDMA.

Were you not listening? He has an anxiety disorder. Holy shit, guys.


Very generally, it sounds like your anxiety disorder doesnt necessarily interject a large amount of social difficulty as opposed to those who are constantly forced to make merry with others. You just dont have the will. Your cognition is essentially deteriorating the social sensibilities that most people have, which is a standard practice in those who are closed off and feel anxious talking with people. You have to understand that the human being is a social mammal, and being that if a a human withdraws from their community its only rational some type of mental illness is present in you, at least partially.

I personally think you should see a doctor for an SSRI and probable cognitive therapy because a question like "Whats it like having relationships between humans?" is not a healthy way to think.

Also, this business about you getting high is obviously a large part of the problem. I can't think of the studies creators off the top of my head, but some scientists made a "Rat Park" study in which one control group had only a few rats and constant morphine drip, while the second control group had a large amount of rats with the same morphine drip in plentiful supply for both groups. Guess what? The more rats in their little playpen, the less they used the drip. They were busy socializing.

 

[pofacedhoe]

to anyone thinking that MDMA will help you with social anxiety...

nah its not good long term. once off yes but people who need it to feel comfortable around others will always fall on some sort of chemical crutch and with regular use MDMA will rape you mentally and you will have terrible anxiety.

been there done that, no thanks

also^ SSRI's? really

they dont work well, they are horrible to come off and they kill your sex drive. shit drugs

the OP has social anxiety and cannabis was a problem. its literally that simple. weed makes socialising awkward. anyway this question is 2 years old lollllllll

 

[MrSpeedyG]

No not to use MDMA as a medicine daily or in every social situation, that would cause devastiating effects.

But a once off, with tested gear could bring wonders of insight.

Then again, it is risky and MAY not be the best thing.

 

[Californication]

Perhaps try getting involved in things you like to do with others!

If you feel like you can't connect with people, try to find mutual interests.

I was in a slightly different situation than you, had a ton of acquaintances and decent friends but always felt I wasn't getting the social interaction I wanted or needed. (Extreme extrovert) It definitely made me lonely and down.

After a good deal of unhappiness with my social life I joined a shooting team and a few university clubs for things I like to do. Having a natural interest in guns made it easy to connect with and talk with my teammates (I was fortunate to have no problems talking with anyone to begin with). Granted none of us are super tight friends (haven't been with the team that long) but its helped establish a couple more good friendships in my life.

Meaningful relations come with time and activity. A good place to start friendships is through mutual interest, and if you find a friend who you seem to click with spend time together and do things! For example it's scientifically proven that people who sing together form closer bonds. Whether it be shooting clays or singing I'm sure this applies to some extent

Weed can make you content to sit around and be anti social, but it can also bring people together. It's all about how you use it.

 

[Xn1919]

unless its pot. i feel drugs kill the drive... but oddly, i feel like i can throw better game on drugs.. esp pills.