harlans
Bluelighter
Stumble Upon introduced me to this site about a week ago. From the little cruising I've done I think I'll end up on The Dark Side most of the time.
My user name comes from one of my favorite trilogies by Richard K Morgan. It sounds pretty masculine, but whatever.
At 34 yrs old I've been struggling with one form of addiction or another fro 20 yrs. Alcohol really sings to me it's siren's song. I's been something like 40 days since I last drank booze, but have spent this whole weekend in a benzo haze. It had a very negative impact on my bank account through the evils of online shopping. I don't think I'll be asking for any refills from my doc on that stuff. I'm sure, though, if I'd been taking them as prescribed those things wouldn't have happened - and the bottle wouldn't empty either.
I was sober for 5 yrs at one point through AA dedication. That ended 2.5 yrs ago when I met the BOY. After2 yrs he's now left and booze has made me try to commit suicide twice in the lat 6 mos. In a way that's a good thing because I can't halt my drinking without hospitalization. Amazingly I still have a job (fuckin miracle - except I'm an atheist, maybe it's that whole foxhole-in-war thing) and without the drinking it seems my anti-depressants are actually working.
Before booze took over I was a classical violist and frequented the goth clubs in my vinyl or corsetted garb. I have no friends left and very distrustful family members due to my alcoholic shenanigans. To most I say good riddance, but now all I do is sit at home, read, watch TV, and play on the computer (and, apparently write long winded bios to a likely non-existing audience). Well, I have started a belly dance class, but those ladies are all older than me and I don't expect to really want to know any of them.
Every aspect of every day is a struggle. The end - or for you IFC buffs: Fin.
My user name comes from one of my favorite trilogies by Richard K Morgan. It sounds pretty masculine, but whatever.
At 34 yrs old I've been struggling with one form of addiction or another fro 20 yrs. Alcohol really sings to me it's siren's song. I's been something like 40 days since I last drank booze, but have spent this whole weekend in a benzo haze. It had a very negative impact on my bank account through the evils of online shopping. I don't think I'll be asking for any refills from my doc on that stuff. I'm sure, though, if I'd been taking them as prescribed those things wouldn't have happened - and the bottle wouldn't empty either.
I was sober for 5 yrs at one point through AA dedication. That ended 2.5 yrs ago when I met the BOY. After2 yrs he's now left and booze has made me try to commit suicide twice in the lat 6 mos. In a way that's a good thing because I can't halt my drinking without hospitalization. Amazingly I still have a job (fuckin miracle - except I'm an atheist, maybe it's that whole foxhole-in-war thing) and without the drinking it seems my anti-depressants are actually working.
Before booze took over I was a classical violist and frequented the goth clubs in my vinyl or corsetted garb. I have no friends left and very distrustful family members due to my alcoholic shenanigans. To most I say good riddance, but now all I do is sit at home, read, watch TV, and play on the computer (and, apparently write long winded bios to a likely non-existing audience). Well, I have started a belly dance class, but those ladies are all older than me and I don't expect to really want to know any of them.
Every aspect of every day is a struggle. The end - or for you IFC buffs: Fin.
