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diazepamforever?

Greenlighter
Joined
Feb 16, 2020
Messages
18
Hello all Bluelighters, greenlighters and anyone I've not mentioned.
Stating the obvious, I'm new here and this is my first post!!

Chose my name because it sure feels like it. Was cold-turkeyed off diazepam as an infant. Prescribed it for teething seizures...
Been dreaming about it, trying to source it and taking it pretty much my whole life.

Right now all I can think about is a cigarette as I lie awake craving. I am doing my first quit attempt at that. Using lozenges but finding them weird, to be frank.
Does anyone have an offhand list of withdrawals I should be ready for, please?

In the UK, 05.10 am. Insomnia... tick. Appetite... tick. Agitated a.f… tick. Depression... new dimension!

Favourite drugs: Like smoking weed but can't while in diazepam withdrawal. Drinking, though I'm in danger of substituting to that. I like my cigs too, but they have to go; they're senseless and expensive and harmful. Enjoyed other rec drugs when younger. Things my heart would just give up on nowadays, I reckon. I've bought some kratom of completely unknown quality. Any tips on that stuff would be greatly appreciated. I thought it might be useful but haven't tried it yet.

Enough from me, thanks. Glad to be here. Off to peruse... Regards and happy days
 
Oh, and on the Kratom, start with about 3g. It is relatively harmless, regardless of the strain, aside from its potential to kickstart an opioid habit...
 
Thanks jackie jones. I'll likely give it a try soon. Once I'm a non-smoker. :) It should be safe for intermittent use during the hairiest bits of benzo w/d... I'm hoping! I realise it's going to be different to opey w/ds and it's unlikely to be any use as a substitute. It's just a tool in the box, you know?
 
Congratulations on quitting smoking. I did the same recently and switched to whole leaf redman chewing tobacco so I can get mouth cancer instead of lung cancer. At least I can breathe now...
 
Not quite "there" yet. Looks like I'll have to quit beer for a while too. Seems to be the only trigger that makes quitting too hard. First weekend though. Decision is made. :)
 
Hey @diazepamforever? - welcome to Bluelight :)

This is a nice intro post so i won't move it, but i suggest you check out Health and Recovery at some point if you'd like more answers to your question.

I love weed! It is sort of a fix all drug with many different abilities. Though dependence on it can be real.

In regards to kratom, i've been using the stuff several times a week for the past month since it doesn't show up on my drug tests. As jackie jones said, 3g is the suggested dose. For me it didn't do much, and i need about 8-10 to feel nice and toasty. Work your way up. See how you feel. Don't expect magic, because it's very subtle, but it definitely takes the edge off and is hard to OD on.

Welcome to the fam!!

Peace.
 
Thanks madness00,. Very pleased to meet you. Looks like I'm on another late night, so I'll get started reading on your suggested link.
Much appreciated. (Also it may save me from asking already-answered questions.)

:)
 
Hey schizopath, cheers for the nod. Sorry didn't see it earlier, mate. Busy and stressed to the maximum. Schools are cancelled now. It's suddenly got harder to hide the day-time madness and depression and stuff.
Just trying to stay sane for now. It's going to take weeks to adjust. Can't rely on my trusted vendor for now so drinking more to compensate. And I'm trying to quit smoking!! Couldn't have picked a worse time...
 
My mum quit successfully using hypnotherapy.

I tried to give up but have other stresses going on so haven't.

Patches helped.

Just cut back as much as you can, it'll be ok.
 
Hey :)

I was probably addicted to Valium as a kid as well. God knows what mum gave us but she loves her prescription meds (and didn’t like children who couldn’t sleep). Been on and off benzos for decades. I’m off at the moment - cold-turkeyed Mogadon mid last year. The psychological addiction is always there but I’m slowly getting better at dealing with anxiety without.

I was thinking the same as what Daisy said.. Benzos + cigarettes, no way :oops:
 
Hey wuts up, just wanted to welcome you to the forum. Wishing you good luck with your withdrawals, coming off benzodiazepines isnt easy but if you believe in yourself you can get it done. They are the class of drugs that are the biggest struggle for me personally and I've been battling an off an on addiction with them for many, many years.

Take care of yourself, see you around the board <3
 
AbbeyLee, it's like my first memory. I can recall that I climbed up to the box of tablets during the night, and helped myself to extra. My mother must have got a fright and just stopped them, fearing that I was becoming addicted. That's when everything got very real indeed. I still have nightmares about that!
Forced cold turkey doesn't work, as we know now. When I was a child; I used to check other peoples' medicine cabinets if we were visiting relatives. A 3 year old drug-seeker!! It was inevitable I'd find my way back to them. I've tried a doctor-assisted taper but he was way too strict and unrealistic.
I would like to be free of the pills. Yet, as much trouble as they cause; I've been able to parent, travel and enjoy much of my adult life. They feel like my missing vitamin or something? Inevitably though, they lose their effectiveness, yet I cling to the addiction as it still enables much... sometimes. Just no guarantees and no stability now. It does indeed suck...
 
Thanks, Cosmic Charlie. I can't even visualize life without them but do keep aiming for reduction and dream, one day, of not needing them at all. It's a scary dream though! :)
 
Yes, mate; I hear you. And could really use the energy and mood lift. It's the withdrawal period and being an irritable person that I fear. My notion to quit occurred before the schools all closed due to this covid 19 situation. It changes the shape of the day for me. Trying to think of ways to adapt but no real ideas yet. I'm not losing sight of the goal though... just not taking on too much at once. Why should my family suffer for my addictions? I just don't feel I have the will power to just do it. Massive respect to those who have done this but I am not that strong. Working on it...
Thanks.
 
It's a bad time to do this, just wait till the kids are at school.

Benzos withdrawal is not a thing I know about but there's "comfort meds".

Maybe seroquel for sleep?
 
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