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  • BDD Moderators: Keif’ Richards | negrogesic

im a mess!!

starryeyes123

Greenlighter
Joined
Jan 11, 2015
Messages
7
Hi all,
im in such a mess right now, i have a serious codeine addiction. I was taking 240mg four times a day sometimes more.
push comes to shove and i decide to quit cold turkey. Ended up in the hospital with severe withdrawels hooked upto drips etc. I then became honest with my doctor and he referred me to a drug councelling programme. He also advised me to go on a taper plan. He was prescribing me 100 codeine at a time and sed he will only supply me with 7 days worth. I went to the chemist to collect it and he has given me 100 again. So im sat here with all this codeine. Hubby has however taken them and us giving me 2 four times a day (30mg phosphate). I feel like im dying. In the hospital it was so scary, i actually thought that im going to die. I cant see a way out of this at all.

Is my addiction a high one?
us it cureable?

im blabbering now as i know there codeine in the house n am getting anxious.
jo x
 
How long have you been on the codienes? Just be happy its codiene and not hydro or worse, oxy/ ++. Ive never been able to quit cold turkey and keep some in my house for a future use (as I always plan too). Ive been taking hydros for about 2 years now off and on, as much as 5-6 a day at some points. I just had to be honest with myself one day and enjoy my final days hooked on them. I had a 3-4 day hell, but by day 3 I was already feeling 100% better than day 1/2. By day 4, I felt healthy again and more upbeat. I was doing shit I had put off for months in days time and since then I havnt looked back. Of course I think about those drugs from time to time, but knowing I have a addicts personality I just stay away at all costs. Id say either finish what you got, since to me it was a waste to try and taper and feel a 40% high, then to just enjoy a couple more days and say goodbye or flush what remains and in a few days youll be back to normal.
 
Let your hubbie continue to taper you down. Even though you were on a mild opiate, you reached real levels of addiction. The taper will make life slightly easer on your body.
 
I feel like im dying. In the hospital it was so scary, i actually thought that im going to die. I cant see a way out of this at all.

Is my addiction a high one?
us it cureable?

im blabbering now as i know there codeine in the house n am getting anxious.
jo x

Coming from someone who has been through opiate withdrawals a good number of times trust me when I say YOU CAN AND WILL GET THROUGH THIS. I know it feels horrendous, I've often thought to myself when going through particularly severe withdrawals "death can't feel much worse than this". But after a number of tough days it does get better and the relief in itself will almost be a high of it's own so to speak. Be thankful that you have a doctor who is being compassionate and actually giving you a taper regimen (while sometimes this can be a double edged sword as you can actually prolong the whole experience if it's not done properly). Some doctors will just cut you off, give you a lecture on how opiate withdrawals are not dangerous, and tell you to tough through it.

If you can bear it (although it sounds like you can't), while intense, cold turkey can sometimes be a better route as you basically just bite the bullet and get through it as opposed to being uncomfortable for a longer period of time while tapering. I'm sure there are some who may disagree but in my experience especially if we're talking addiction and not plain dependence (there is a difference) where control of dosing is an issue, I would prefer to get it over with but then again a lot of times I have had some form of comfort meds to help whether it be benzos, gabapentin, or even an anti-psychotic short term (I find Zyprexa aka Olanzapine to help with the psych symptoms as well as sleep) so having something to help does make a difference. However if cold turkey is too much for you to handle then by all means do what you have to do.

Anyways I wish the best of luck to you. It sounds like your not as deep into the rabbit hole as you could be and just try to remember that you WILL feel better even though it probably feels like there's no light at the end of the tunnel. Using the opioid conversion chart your daily codeine dose is equivalent to approx 144mg of hydrocodone a day so that is not too bad of a habit especially compared to others so I would imagine if you would go cold turkey the worst of it should be over after about the 3rd or 4th day (at least in my experience, mileage varies per user) but I can't venture an opinion on a taper as I've never gone that route. Just hang in there!:) Opiate withdrawals suck ass and I can't say I'd wish them on anyone but they do pass. Best of luck to you.
 
Hi everyone, thanks for your replys,
ibe been to see the doctor (a different one than who gave me the 100, but at the same surgery. Im in the UK). anyways she was so nice and understanding and has herself been there. She has given me another 56 codeine which the prescription will be repeated weekly until a review in 4 weeks. She said that 2 four times a day will still make me withdraw as the drop from 10 to 2 is a big one, she advised me to go to 8, then 6 etc. She said diazepam will help but wont give me them as im now classed an addict. Im already on gabapentin and she did actually recommend using this site so you guys have a good reputation. She also said was you doing a CWE on shop bought codeine n i laughed.

Well right now im feeling shit as ive just spent 3 hours in town wirh the daughter looking for school shoes and had only had 2 codeine. I was literally ripping my hair out!

also my arse is in fire! Swallowing immodium like smarties ha.

i cant get hold of any diazepam round here, what else can help.

cheers, jo
 
Continue a taper. It won't be painless but better than withdrawal from something stronger. Be careful with the immodium in high doses and prolonged uses. That will eventually need a taper plan as well if you take it long enough.
 
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