I'ld like to hear from anyone who uses an opioid to fight depression.

[DesertHarp]

I'm not being unduly influenced by anyone. I've appreciated all posted feedback. It's all food for thought. Sometimes, when it feels like you're at the absolute end of your rope, it's good to be reminded that you probably haven't exhausted all options.

Exploring options can have unexpectedly good results. Many years ago I thought I was about to completely despair, if I couldn't keep myself employed. I went and bought a revolver, just to have as an option. Next I went to a range to get a feel for handling it, as I had no former experience. Well, some seasoned shooters at the range saw I was a novice, and they befriended me. I ended up having a really good time, spending the afternoon there. I signed up for a beginner's course the place offered. That turned out to be real interesting. Plus, it proved to be a very friendly environment. The positive experience completely changed the mood I was in.

Next I had to travel 2000 miles to where there was a good job opportunity. I was afraid to fly because I didn't know if I could legally transport my new possession on a plane to where I was going. So I took a bus to avoid any baggage checks. That turned out to be an adventure. After a thousand miles, I took a travel break in a small, rural town for a few days. It was a cool place where I met some nice people and was even offered a job. Instead, I continued on. By the time I got where I was headed, I had a real positive attitude, which was all I needed to get my act together. Sometimes you just have to wander. I think it's what Australians call a "walk-about." Pretty soon, I probably should take a long drive or a train ride and see where I end up.

 

[phall]

Communication bro. Massive tool for depression that we find hard to do at times.

 

[Uknowit4now]

I've started a few threads already. I'm starting this one to introduce myself, which I didn't do before.

I take hydrocodone for back pain. I get 60 tablets each month. (What I get is called Vicodin - hydrocodone and acetaminophen - 10/325.) That's my only supply. It's prescribed legally. Much of the time, my back pain isn't a big issue. Often, the real reason I keep taking these pills is to feel better mentally. I suffer from depression. I've been to shrinks about it and tried all kinds of psych meds. Nothing they prescibe does much. I function okay.

It seems like my life revolves around these pills. Basically, I take one every twelve hours. I'm obsessed with these pills. I count the hours until I can take another one. Sometimes, when the depression is bad, I don't wait the twelve hours. If I run out of pills before the month is up, I pay a price. If I go 36 hours without a pill, I start to have withdrawal. For me that is "restless leg syndrome." I would call it akathisia because it is round the clock. It's torture, so I mostly space out my pills to last the whole month.
At times, I think of suicide to escape the depression. I feel like these tablets are the best thing I have going for me. Yesterday, I took two tablets at the same time because I was having a miserable time with severe depression. That 20 mg of hydrocodone was like getting a glass of water in the desert. It helped a lot.

I wonder if anyone else here finds that using an opioid relieves depression. I don't discuss this with any doctor. I figure that would be the fastest way to lose this prescription that I value so much.

I always have to fight the temptation to use up my tablets ahead of schedule because I don't want to face withdrawal.

I'm trying to find a way to feel better without using up my tablets too soon. I'm thinking of trying edible cannabis. I don't find alcohol helpful, so I'm not much of a drinker.

Been there done that was prescribed percocets and methodone for pain, as i had a bullet stuck in my spine (L4) uhh 30 years went by and after realizing how bad these messed me up (and after about 5 years on these pills i started herion.. why take 100 pills a day whenni coukd do dope!, as i was literally taking 40 percs a day and 1000mg of methadone a day yes a day thats how bad it got, and then started mixing that with a bag of dope! Hard to believe but when your tolerance is thru the roof thats what happens plain and simple.. especially when you have the access to these drugs... and yes it 100% helped my depression well i thought anyway.. it actually sent me down a spiral of hell... needless to say i got on suboxone for a few years took a while.to get off but ibhave been clean since i think it was 6/29/2022, and holy f**K ive never felt better never ever ever felt better.. zero pain in my back now too.. those drugs we actually causi g me to have quadruple the pain i had especially on those days of have wd's cause ive had my sharen of those days and f that.. no way nonway in hell am i ever going back to that.. i dont gaf what pain i have it never helps.. and only made me even more depressed.. your mind shoukd not be thinking of taking that crap.. if it is your addiction is bad. So stop now when you can.... so trust me get off that crap its making you more depressed and causing you more physical pain.. 100% facts
Sure it helps for rhe moment but that moment is small and gos fast.. the moments of waiting and pain superceed those momemts of bliss... its all crap trust me i have the experience most dont and i am embarrassed to evwn say so.. good luck besafe and you already know what to do, so do it... dont let something like that control you and your life.. thats what it does.. get clean and "fly like an eagle baby!" You will NEVER regret that... peace..

 

[Wishdoctor79]

I'm not being unduly influenced by anyone. I've appreciated all posted feedback. It's all food for thought. Sometimes, when it feels like you're at the absolute end of your rope, it's good to be reminded that you probably haven't exhausted all options.

Exploring options can have unexpectedly good results. Many years ago I thought I was about to completely despair, if I couldn't keep myself employed. I went and bought a revolver, just to have as an option. Next I went to a range to get a feel for handling it, as I had no former experience. Well, some seasoned shooters at the range saw I was a novice, and they befriended me. I ended up having a really good time, spending the afternoon there. I signed up for a beginner's course the place offered. That turned out to be real interesting. Plus, it proved to be a very friendly environment. The positive experience completely changed the mood I was in.

Next I had to travel 2000 miles to where there was a good job opportunity. I was afraid to fly because I didn't know if I could legally transport my new possession on a plane to where I was going. So I took a bus to avoid any baggage checks. That turned out to be an adventure. After a thousand miles, I took a travel break in a small, rural town for a few days. It was a cool place where I met some nice people and was even offered a job. Instead, I continued on. By the time I got where I was headed, I had a real positive attitude, which was all I needed to get my act together. Sometimes you just have to wander. I think it's what Australians call a "walk-about." Pretty soon, I probably should take a long drive or a train ride and see where I end up.

You're reminding me of how I came to relocate 2000 miles to the desert Southwest. Entire summer prior was hitchhiking cross country and fell in love with the landscape. A year later I arrived by train with bicycle, took a taxi to college dorms the night before classes never having seen the biggest city in the state, and been here ever since.

Wow, a revolver. Old school to the max. That'll sure get attention at the range. Open carry constitutionally protected here. Lots of 9mm semi-auto but never handled a six-shooter. Wear it proudly visiting NM or AZ where guns are legal.

 

[TessaBella]

I've been an addict my whole life for 20+ years. Heroin and alcohol mostly, also been dependent on benzos many times. Been a druggie since I was 14.

Deprecating your thought process is part of improving it, as is receiving criticism which isn't even what I was doing.



I'm diagnosing your question and trying to figure out what would best help your situation.

I am indeed here to help, not your enemy, nor trying to belittle your plight or pain. I'm actually a really nice guy, being objective and helpful. You can't address depression while opioid dependent without realizing opioid withdrawal is making you acutely depressed itself. And like I said, indeed they are different things, but are commonly found in bed together.

My late husband struggled with clinical depression hi entire adult life. We met at 14 so I knew him before and after the depression hit. He also had major back surgery at 39 and was given extra strength Vicodin, which he loved. His mom was a valium addict and alcoholic so addiction ran in the family. He was on every new anti depressant that came out because none seemed to work. His doctor really wanted him to try Prozac but there was no generic yet and we couldn't swing $225 a month for 30 tablets. When he had his spine fused, he was trying out Paxil with not much luck. Man, when that first Vicodin hit his brain, it was like he was born again. The change in his mood was astounding! There was no internet back in the 90s that we could afford so I asked his surgeon about it at a follow up appt and he said, oh sure, these types of pain meds cause euphoria so of course the depression is better. Yeah, and then he cut him off after 6mos and I was back married to a very depressed man and it was worse because he now knew there was something that could help him. Bout that time Prozac came out with a generic and, while it wasn't as fun as the vic's, it did help his depression immensely. My point? Opioids for everyone!!

 

[Wishdoctor79]

Communication bro. Massive tool for depression that we find hard to do at times.

My late husband struggled with clinical depression hi entire adult life. We met at 14 so I knew him before and after the depression hit. He also had major back surgery at 39 and was given extra strength Vicodin, which he loved. His mom was a valium addict and alcoholic so addiction ran in the family. He was on every new anti depressant that came out because none seemed to work. His doctor really wanted him to try Prozac but there was no generic yet and we couldn't swing $225 a month for 30 tablets. When he had his spine fused, he was trying out Paxil with not much luck. Man, when that first Vicodin hit his brain, it was like he was born again. The change in his mood was astounding! There was no internet back in the 90s that we could afford so I asked his surgeon about it at a follow up appt and he said, oh sure, these types of pain meds cause euphoria so of course the depression is better. Yeah, and then he cut him off after 6mos and I was back married to a very depressed man and it was worse because he now knew there was something that could help him. Bout that time Prozac came out with a generic and, while it wasn't as fun as the vic's, it did help his depression immensely. My point? Opioids for everyone!!

It was like that for me too.

The ancient Greek Hippocrates called it Melancholy Humours and he prescribed extracts and Decoctions of papaver somniferum, the opium poppy plant.

 

[Wishdoctor79]

There's definitely a bandwagon effect when high-profile Elon Musk disses SSRIs and announces he takes ketamine (prescribed p.r.n.) when his "brain chemistry goes super negative."
https://www.theblaze.com/news/elon-musk-drugs-ketamine-ssri-antidepressants?utm_source=cna-app

 

[TheUltimateFixx]

Communication bro. Massive tool for depression that we find hard to do at times.

Yep and it gets worse because the more depressed you are, the less you feel wanting / able to communicate.

 

[TheUltimateFixx]

The ancient Greek Hippocrates called it Melancholy Humours and he prescribed extracts and Decoctions of papaver somniferum, the opium poppy plant.

The Sumerians, who were the first documented cultivators, called it 'hul gil', the joy plant. There's a reason for that xd

 

[DesertHarp]

My late husband struggled with clinical depression hi entire adult life. We met at 14 so I knew him before and after the depression hit. He also had major back surgery at 39 and was given extra strength Vicodin, which he loved. His mom was a valium addict and alcoholic so addiction ran in the family. He was on every new anti depressant that came out because none seemed to work. His doctor really wanted him to try Prozac but there was no generic yet and we couldn't swing $225 a month for 30 tablets. When he had his spine fused, he was trying out Paxil with not much luck. Man, when that first Vicodin hit his brain, it was like he was born again. The change in his mood was astounding! There was no internet back in the 90s that we could afford so I asked his surgeon about it at a follow up appt and he said, oh sure, these types of pain meds cause euphoria so of course the depression is better. Yeah, and then he cut him off after 6mos and I was back married to a very depressed man and it was worse because he now knew there was something that could help him. Bout that time Prozac came out with a generic and, while it wasn't as fun as the vic's, it did help his depression immensely. My point? Opioids for everyone!!

My late husband struggled with clinical depression hi entire adult life. We met at 14 so I knew him before and after the depression hit. He also had major back surgery at 39 and was given extra strength Vicodin, which he loved. His mom was a valium addict and alcoholic so addiction ran in the family. He was on every new anti depressant that came out because none seemed to work. His doctor really wanted him to try Prozac but there was no generic yet and we couldn't swing $225 a month for 30 tablets. When he had his spine fused, he was trying out Paxil with not much luck. Man, when that first Vicodin hit his brain, it was like he was born again. The change in his mood was astounding! There was no internet back in the 90s that we could afford so I asked his surgeon about it at a follow up appt and he said, oh sure, these types of pain meds cause euphoria so of course the depression is better. Yeah, and then he cut him off after 6mos and I was back married to a very depressed man and it was worse because he now knew there was something that could help him. Bout that time Prozac came out with a generic and, while it wasn't as fun as the vic's, it did help his depression immensely. My point? Opioids for everyone!!

I read an article that said that, by avoiding opioids, doctors are sometimes setting the stage for serious problems that come with alternative non-opioid analgesics. This article focused on the high use of NSAIDS, like ibuprofen, among seniors, which can cause GI bleeding. I was put on Indocin (indomethacin) for achilles tendinitis that had me limping on my left leg. That's a prescription NSAID anti-inflammatory drug. It's used a lot for gout. For me, it was like the fountain of youth. My heel got better and so did other nagging aches I'ld acquired over the years. The stuff was fabulous! After months of taking it 3 times a day, I got extremely sick with diverticulitis. I was septic. Two weeks later, they told me I was missing almost 1/3rd of my red blood cells. (I could barely walk.) I'ld developed bleeding ulcers in my stomach and colon. Indocin can increase the risk of getting diverticulitis and GI ulcers because it removes the protective mucus coating that covers the entire lining of the GI tract. (All NSAIDs do that to some extent.) In some respects, opioids are a more benign class of drugs. They don't mess with your gut's lining. Nor are they toxic to the liver, as is Tylenol. Recently, doctors stopped putting heart patients on daily baby aspirin because even that is not so safe as we thought. (Increases the risk of hemorrhagic stroke.)

Opioids are constipating, which is not a trivial problem. Sensible use of laxatives can effectively counteract that. Of course, the main risk of taking an opioid is respiratory depression. One does have to breathe. So it's dangerous to keep upping the dosage, or to combine it with other sedating agents, like alcohol or benzos.

Doctors really need to analyze a particular patient's particular situation. Sometimes, I believe doctors just don't want to have to think that hard. Also, they're running scared because the feds are on them, due to the irresponsible prescribing practices of some doctors.

Prozac didn't do a darn thing for my depression. Vicodin makes me want to be more active because I feel so much better physically and mentally.

 

[DesertHarp]

You're reminding me of how I came to relocate 2000 miles to the desert Southwest. Entire summer prior was hitchhiking cross country and fell in love with the landscape. A year later I arrived by train with bicycle, took a taxi to college dorms the night before classes never having seen the biggest city in the state, and been here ever since.

Wow, a revolver. Old school to the max. That'll sure get attention at the range. Open carry constitutionally protected here. Lots of 9mm semi-auto but never handled a six-shooter. Wear it proudly visiting NM or AZ where guns are legal.

Mine's a 5 shot barrel. It was recommended as a nice size for a lady. It's pretty, with bluish metal and a walnut handle. I liked the mechanical simplicity.

 

[phall]

u americans like your guns eh, in uk we see someone with a gun we close the country .. and that includes when the police are carrying it .. in fact its probably worse when the police are carrying it lol

 

[phall]

ive always found my gut adjusts to the amount of opiates im on, like a new habit causes some constipation but as u increase or get used to the amount ure body adjusts till virtually normmal.. now coming back off is a different story lol.

correct about nasaids mate, lethal in all forms long term, we get prescribed ant acids like omeprazole here with them if have to take them, steroids are prob less damaging even tho carry their own risks

 

[Wishdoctor79]

Mine's a 5 shot barrel. It was recommended as a nice size for a lady. It's pretty, with bluish metal and a walnut handle. I liked the mechanical simplicity.

Top of the mornin to ya, milady.

 

[Bytor_and_the_snowdog]

Hi all

im new to this site and found it googling this very subject thread. ive been on and off for a few years now. ive been off opiates since the superbowl of this year - since feb 2023. I was never what one would call a big user. most oxy i ever tooki n a day was 120mg - and that was just for a few days to a week. mostly 60-80mg a day, and always at night. im a competitive bodybuilder, so i would always make sure to never take them before my training sessions. but i could remember driving home after my workout so antsy to pop one as soon as i got in.
My story is kind of embarrassing as to how i started taking them. i had from a friend who would give me percs monthly. But i never took them. she would give me 10 every month and over two years time i had a nice amount as i never took them.
Then one day i was feeling flu-ish - so i took a 7.5 / 325 and WOW!!! I not only felt better but i was outgoing (im an intro / extrovert if you will) and felt the urge to work!!! id stay up and just work all night. But i knew of the potential dangers so i would stick to once a week in the beginning. but i was so happy! was great!!!
Id only take them at parties or wedding or any kind of function. where i live - there are weddings every other week, and my wifes family is very close so theres always an event of some sort. its a orthodox jewish community so theres always something...literally every week. regardless, id take them so i wouldnt drink alcohol. Alcohol is the worst thing you can put in your body if youre a bber, ruins your physique. - so id take a perc and boom feel even better than if i drank and so fucking happy. life of the party

As you can imagine i started taking more and graduated to oxys (not from doc - but pharm) and i started taking them daily.
i realized i had a problem and got off. started again 5 months later - the ill just take one attitude and it happened again only worse. got off this year in feb and got on bupe. it helped with withdrawlas - but at the time i had no idea they were so addicting and hard to get off. i probably didnt need to take them - as i wasnt on opiates that long and wasnt taking a crazy amount like i mentioned earlier. i received bad advice. ive been on bupe now for 5 months at 4mg a day
im depressed and im always so exhausted. im never happy anymore. music which is my first love i dont enjoy anymore. i dont feel it or get chills like i used to. one of my fav bands came to town and i actully didnt go. i never would have done that
also, i should mention - i have a psychiatrist who prescribed me wellbutrin and prozac, does nothing. adderal as well and it just makes me feel jittery. im also prescribed clonipin, 4mg a day (PTSD from years ago - been on for 12 years )- but i never take that many, as prescribed or less- but they do help with sleep and the extreme anxiety i get (my doc doesnt know of my issues or he would drop me - so im afraid to tell him he thinks my depression is chronic)

my question: i still have oxy, tram and perc - i was thinking of getting off the subs by getting back on one of the opiates - and then taper down. everywhere i read is bupe is very difficult to get off. i own a successful biz, workout 4 days a week and have a family who have no idea of my drug use - wife thinks i just have depression naturaly if you will. i want my life back
does anyone think i can get off bupe by using one of the following oxy, tram or percs? and then taper off one of those?

sorry for the long first post but im desperate and thanks

 

[OrbitalCombustion]

I've started a few threads already. I'm starting this one to introduce myself, which I didn't do before.

I take hydrocodone for back pain. I get 60 tablets each month. (What I get is called Vicodin - hydrocodone and acetaminophen - 10/325.) That's my only supply. It's prescribed legally. Much of the time, my back pain isn't a big issue. Often, the real reason I keep taking these pills is to feel better mentally. I suffer from depression. I've been to shrinks about it and tried all kinds of psych meds. Nothing they prescibe does much. I function okay.

It seems like my life revolves around these pills. Basically, I take one every twelve hours. I'm obsessed with these pills. I count the hours until I can take another one. Sometimes, when the depression is bad, I don't wait the twelve hours. If I run out of pills before the month is up, I pay a price. If I go 36 hours without a pill, I start to have withdrawal. For me that is "restless leg syndrome." I would call it akathisia because it is round the clock. It's torture, so I mostly space out my pills to last the whole month.
At times, I think of suicide to escape the depression. I feel like these tablets are the best thing I have going for me. Yesterday, I took two tablets at the same time because I was having a miserable time with severe depression. That 20 mg of hydrocodone was like getting a glass of water in the desert. It helped a lot.

I wonder if anyone else here finds that using an opioid relieves depression. I don't discuss this with any doctor. I figure that would be the fastest way to lose this prescription that I value so much.

I always have to fight the temptation to use up my tablets ahead of schedule because I don't want to face withdrawal.

I'm trying to find a way to feel better without using up my tablets too soon. I'm thinking of trying edible cannabis. I don't find alcohol helpful, so I'm not much of a drinker.

Yes opioids can help with depression, but it's temporary and what I hate the most is that I have to deal with withdrawal because it's very potent for be no matter what I'm taking - pills, kratom, heroin, etc. It just sucks. Kratom is great for my depression and I even have a friend that told me she would rather die than not take her kratom.

I recently got off suboxone and in about 4 months and the depression honestly got worse over time. For me opioids give me energy, without them in a sack of potatoes. It would be nice if they would prescribe me a small truckload of morphine or oxies so I could not have to worry about getting stuff off the street or using kratom because the quality varies so much.

It's hard to say what the solution is but i know the longer you live like this the harder it is if you do decide to stop. Eventually you will probably eat those pills up faster as they do less and less for you over time which means you'll look elsewhere for something or try to get multiple prescriptions. At least this seems to be what happens to a lot of people. My friend is fairly responsible with his ADHD meds but this is a different class of drugs and not the same, but at least he's able to manage it. Wishing you the best.

 

[phall]

It's prob easier to taper something like sr Oxy imo. The opiates change your brain function bytor. It won't be permensnt with your usage but can be. The lack of energy will last until uve been off all of it for some time. Hopefully with your use this would only be a few months. Ppl use kratom like mentioned it gives a small boost when needed but is still an opiate .my advice try to taper using some slow release oxys. If u need a little boost for a big day try a little kratom but taper to zero and use kratom only if necessary to get thru events. It will pass bro.
Gl

 

[Bytor_and_the_snowdog]

It's prob easier to taper something like sr Oxy imo. The opiates change your brain function bytor. It won't be permensnt with your usage but can be. The lack of energy will last until uve been off all of it for some time. Hopefully with your use this would only be a few months. Ppl use kratom like mentioned it gives a small boost when needed but is still an opiate .my advice try to taper using some slow release oxys. If u need a little boost for a big day try a little kratom but taper to zero and use kratom only if necessary to get thru events. It will pass bro.
Gl

thank you for the reply.
how long would you wait to start tapering with oxys since im using the suboxone. or when can i start after taking my last sub.
i believe i only have the short acting ox - and how many mg would you start the taper with.
sorry so many questions. but im a mess and want to get better.
i just PRAY i didnt do any permanent damage

 

[Bytor_and_the_snowdog]

Yes opioids can help with depression, but it's temporary and what I hate the most is that I have to deal with withdrawal because it's very potent for be no matter what I'm taking - pills, kratom, heroin, etc. It just sucks. Kratom is great for my depression and I even have a friend that told me she would rather die than not take her kratom.

I recently got off suboxone and in about 4 months and the depression honestly got worse over time. For me opioids give me energy, without them in a sack of potatoes. It would be nice if they would prescribe me a small truckload of morphine or oxies so I could not have to worry about getting stuff off the street or using kratom because the quality varies so much.

It's hard to say what the solution is but i know the longer you live like this the harder it is if you do decide to stop. Eventually you will probably eat those pills up faster as they do less and less for you over time which means you'll look elsewhere for something or try to get multiple prescriptions. At least this seems to be what happens to a lot of people. My friend is fairly responsible with his ADHD meds but this is a different class of drugs and not the same, but at least he's able to manage it. Wishing you the best.

how long were you on subs and at what dose? depression scares me more than anything. its horrific - sorry youre still dealing with it after 4 months.
ughhh

 

[phall]

No it's very unlikely there's anything permensnt done. Even ppl that have used their whole life can find a way to carry on. It's just the cravings can remain like forever. Some ppl even dream about it years later l
When u start to withdrawal u can swap over np. Like with all maintenance therapy and tapers start low allow that to leave system pretty much and titrate upwards till u find a happy spot . Don't rush it. U really need slow release stuff tho. Not just physically but so mentally u don't keep looking at clock etc. If u only have what u have find what u need to stay happy then maybe just get a pill cutter or something and after first week goto 3/4 a pill till u adjust and so on .maybe even every fortnight. U can use other things to take any edge off u feel. Gabapentine. SSRIs. Low dose of benzos when u get near finishing the tapers