TDS If I admit I attempted suicide a month ago, will I be hospitalized now?

happyginny

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As the title says, I did a stupid thing a few weeks ago. I sliced my arm, trying to open my vein. I had just little blades from a disposable razor. I kept digging deeper into my arm trying to find the stupid vein but only succeeded in giving myself a nice ugly laceration. I saw two tendons and meat, never the vein. I was in the area you would think it would be, but i guess there was a reason i was unsuccessful. I did it in the bath tub. It never bled like I thought it would. It stung, when put under water, worse than it hurt. Like I said, it did not bleed as much as i thought and i could tell i was not going to bleed to death. so i took a bath. I didnt have any guaze wrap so I tied a sock around my arm to try and hold the cut together.

When my son got home (he is 23) I told him and showed him. I knew it would need stitches. This was about 6 hours after I cut it. Part of me felt like such an immense failure. How can i fail at even THAT?

He agreed not to tell the dr and i went to the er to have it sewed up. Gave then a bullshit story about being on a metal ladder taking down the christmas decorations and slipping. Said it was an older ladder and had some piece of metal sticking out and it dug into my arm. I guess because it was like gauged in that it looked like that is what really happened. i had just kept pushing that stupid flimsy blade as hard as i could and digging into my arm thinking I would eventually hit the vein. it was evidently off to the side. the dr had said i was lucky i didnt catch it over there cause that would have been bad. I was deep enough, just not, lined up, I guess i would call it.

I need 4 sutures inside my arm and 9 outside to close it. so not a really long cut.

I do see a therapist. I was having an insurance issue (state coverage) where on Dec 31 my insurance ended. No dr visits, no therapist, no meds. So cold turkey on my depression medication, fentanyl and others. I just kind of crashed i guess. Had been sick as can be for a couple of days, from not having the fentanyl i know now.

I am seeing a psychiatrist for the first time later this month. they are trying to get my meds straight for the depression. This was in the works before my attempt. He can do combinations of different depression medications my therapist said, as well as hopefully something for my anxiety .

I don't think I want to LIE to him or to my therapist. I am NOT suicidal now. I am assuming he will ask that. Sometimes my therapist asks, if I have been having a bad week and have an emotional session, she will mention it. I feel like I should tell both of them about it, but am afraid that I will be admitted to the hospital or something and placed on that 72 hour hold.

Would that possibly happen? I have seen my therapist just once since it happened. I attempted on Jan 9. Saw my therapist Tuesday. Does anyone know what the legal rule, or whatever it is called, AFTER an attempt?

Thanks for listening, I have found this to be a wonderful site, and this board especially, seems to call to me almost daily. I do not post a lot, but reading it alone often brings me some kind of...peace?....calmness??
 
I don't think there is a "legal rule" (plus you didn't say where you lived anyway, laws vary from place to place but I will assume US since that's usually where people live if they don't say). It's up to whether or not your doctor thinks you are currently a danger to yourself or others.
 
best not to tell a doctor you are suicidal unless you are actually planning on topping yourself. You could tell them if you are having thoughts of death though and you will most likely get diagnosed with depression.
 
You won't be hospitalized for a past suicide attempt. They can only do that if they think you're a current danger to yourself....in most parts of the world anyway (I can assure you if you're in the US, the UK or France, you're fine).
I think you need to be 100% honest with your therapist or it completely defeats the purpose of therapy in the first place.
Hope you're okay <3
 
I can't promise you what your particular doctors will do, but the rule is generally this: you can go in and tell them you feel suicidal, and they won't commit you. If you go in saying you're going to kill yourself, they will most likely commit you. If you go in saying you're going to kill youself and have a plan, there is a 100% chance of not walking out of that office without an escort to take you to the hospital. That's what I learned in my schooling for psychology, and generally what I've seen be put into practice. I would say you can tell them what you tried to do and specify that you are NOT suicidal and have hope for the future. I don't see why they'd commit you for something that has already passed. I will warn you if you try this again (god forbid) you're not leaving the hospital. I had two self-injerous incidents that needed stitches and the first one I walked out of, the second one I got a plice escort to the psych ward. I wasn't even trying to kill myself, just hurt myself.

This is by no means a gurantee that they won't feel you need more intensive treatment. Maybe just bring up that you used to struggle with suicidal ideations and see how they react to that. If it's badly, you don't have to mention that you actually attempted or how recently it was.

However: I do not reccommend lying to the people you're asking to help you get your head screwed on straight. They can only help you if you're honest. It's not easy but it will be worth it. And you may want to consider if you need inpatient treatment, or a partial hospitalization/day treatment program. If your doctors reccommend something more intensive you should probably listen. The idea of suicide doesn't just disappear overnight and if it's something you still feel like you'll turn to PLEASE get help.

Other than that...please bring your son in for a few sessions with your therapist. He's got to be scared out of his fucking mind and if he helped you lie and you end up hurting yourself again he'll never forgive himself.
 
^Nice post. I think it's pretty spot on. I actually rang myself an ambulance last Thursday and got myself taken to A&E at my local hospital as a real danger to myself at that point and they STILL didn't commit me. They kept me till I was calm and rational, at that point I was let home. Unless you are actively suicidal and about to kill yourself at the earliest opportunity if left to your own devices there's no need for so drastic a measure as locking you up for your own protection, is there?

Thesameoldfears is right on this: always be honest with your therapist. It's pointless giving them only half truths. How can they help you best if they only have partial information? They can't, simple as. It might be that they might feel that a spell inside as an in-patient is something worth considering as a voluntary option perhaps to help get your meds straight or so you can get some intensive therapy done to get you through what may be a bit of a crisis point but I can't see them insisting you go in for a suicidal episode that is already in the past. If you were that actively suicidal you'd have found another way to do it after that failed attempt, wouldn't you? That you haven't would suggest you are not an immediate danger to yourself. No point locking you up then.
 
You are covered under doctor patient confidentuality. I tried by taking 500 xanax but wife had a premanition and came home early. I was shutting down and they barley pulled me back. I sure feel stupid now. That was 6 years ago and I shared with all my docs and nothing happened. In most states it is not illegal to attempt suicide unless you are assisting someone.

Blessings...
 
Other than that...please bring your son in for a few sessions with your therapist. He's got to be scared out of his fucking mind and if he helped you lie and you end up hurting yourself again he'll never forgive himself.

I second this emphatically. This is a huge burden for a son to carry.

I also wanted to say that I have voluntarily admitted myself a couple of times when I was worried about myself. It was a much needed extraction out of my normal external life that allowed me to actually face just what needed to change inside without all the mind-clutter of what was stressing me. It's hard to take responsibility for your own healing but we all do have to do that. There is help, and I hope that you can find some both for you and your son. Most of the things that we choose to feel bad about and turn against ourselves can be let go of, but it really takes a lot of courage and determination and the hard part is when you are depressed this can be just too overwhelming. I hope things get easier soon.<3
 
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