TDS Ideation & Crisis Support

[CFC]

Maybe. I know post-surgery on my sinuses last year, I'd get ringing only if I laid back in a specific posture but it'd go away within like a minute of getting up. That posture (laying back against my wall propped up by pillows) does not induce that ringing anymore... it's strange. All I know is that THC never caused any spikes during the 2.5 months after the surgery. Hell it wasn't even causing them the weeks before where I gradually started using again after a 6 month tolerance break. And last night, my ears started ringing LESS after I got high, so I don't get it. Like most of the time it gets worse, sometimes it doesn't change, sometimes it even might get better. Potent flower or dabs will spike them the worst, but then, I've had times where they didn't. So I wonder what THC could have to do with what's going on, even the acupuncturist was like hmm, that doesn't sound like it would've caused this.

Obviously I have no idea But the body and the way it interacts with the things we take, the way we feel, the amount of daylight, the amount of sleep, is so infinitely complex that you may never get any answers. So often, that's sadly the case with these odd or debilitating things we just can't seem to understand. Out of purely speculative interest though, you do see random stuff like this, which probably means absolutely nothing and has no salience whatsoever to your issue. But nevertheless, could be a little food for thought to munch through:

The effect of delta-9-tetrahydrocannabinol (THC) on cerebrospinal fluid (CSF) flow in rats was studied. When administered in doses of 25 mg/kg to 45 mg/kg intraperitoneally, THC caused inhibition of CSF flow; in larger doses a smaller response was noted. In response to THC, CSF flow showed an initial drop, a return toward baseline, and a secondary decrease. It is postulated that this biphasic effect is due to a combination of THC's sympathomimetic effects on the CNS plus the local action that this drug has on choroidal synaptosomal neurotransmitters.

The effect of delta-9-tetrahydrocannabinol on rat cerebrospinal fluid - PubMed

The effect of delta-9-tetrahydrocannabinol (THC) on cerebrospinal fluid (CSF) flow in rats was studied. The ventricular system of rats anesthetized with ketamine sulfate was cannulated via cisternal puncture, and CSF production was recorded. When administered in doses of 25 mg/kg to 45 mg/kg...

pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov

 

[BourbonMac]

Jogging will help in more ways than one, and it's so good that it helps quiten your tinnitus for a bit.

It had been but in the last 2 days it no longer really does :/ and my anemia seems like it's giving me worse symptoms so I'm not able to go for as long. Today at work I thought I was gonna faint, I started off OK and then within an hour I could barely walk, stand, move my arms, but I couldn't go home because I'm maxed out on attendance and Walmart doesn't give a fuck even if you're throwing up which I was holding back hard, and that says a lot. I've puked one time in the last 17 years and it was mega hungover in March 2017 (after having already been drinking regularly for 4 years by that point and in extreme volumes).

I think only because I was then on anti-depressants was I able to get that hungover or drunk so much easier. Honestly felt like I was dying, it was awful, and I could hardly get any nap in because my skin loves to just randomly get irritated and itchy at the worst times, this could have something to do with deficiencies in an area but I have no idea. Today was the worst day for me to get it, I was fine my whole shift, come home to nap, too itchy. I used baking soda and water and was able to get an hour nap in but that's not enough. I need to get to bed as early as I can tonight, Saturdays are hell but a Saturday before memorial day in a hick state under low staff? It's going to be pure hell. Sometimes I'm itchy at work, come home and it goes away, sometimes it's the other way around like today. Either way my ears have sucked really bad all day, so if the anemia is really why in the past month and a half I've often had these immense fatigue and nausea spells, maybe there's a link, I really don't know.

 

[BourbonMac]

Obviously I have no idea But the body and the way it interacts with the things we take, the way we feel, the amount of daylight, the amount of sleep, is so infinitely complex that you may never get any answers. So often, that's sadly the case with these odd or debilitating things we just can't seem to understand. Out of purely speculative interest though, you do see random stuff like this, which probably means absolutely nothing and has no salience whatsoever to your issue. But nevertheless, could be a little food for thought to munch through:

The effect of delta-9-tetrahydrocannabinol on rat cerebrospinal fluid - PubMed

The effect of delta-9-tetrahydrocannabinol (THC) on cerebrospinal fluid (CSF) flow in rats was studied. The ventricular system of rats anesthetized with ketamine sulfate was cannulated via cisternal puncture, and CSF production was recorded. When administered in doses of 25 mg/kg to 45 mg/kg...

pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov

Is there some kind of ELI5 for this?

 

[carbonhalo]

Question...
At what age/physical state is it acceptable to plan an exit strategy?

 

[edika]

Question...
At what age/physical state is it acceptable to plan an exit strategy?

Never.

 

[BourbonMac]

Physical state is a factor I'm not sure is related unless it was an issue for you. None of us should want to die, but it's what our brains are wired to think and want to do.

 

[ageingpartyfiend]

Question...
At what age/physical state is it acceptable to plan an exit strategy?

well, it depends who you ask - and in any case nobody could possibly provide a definitive answer

it's purely subjective imho, and to say 'never' as someone said above is totally disingenuous

 

[Senior Moderator]

Question...
At what age/physical state is it acceptable to plan an exit strategy?

I'm not sure what this question is leading to, exactly. Do you mean acceptable from a moral perspective? A societal perspective? A legal perspective?

it's purely subjective imho, and to say 'never' as someone said above is totally disingenuous

On one hand I agree with them, it's never acceptable to plan suicide as (having been suicidal myself many times and even made several real attempts, at which I am eternally grateful that I failed). But I see where you're coming from too, that there are many situations where people may feel it is acceptable to plan suicide, therefore yes in that way it is subjective.

 

[ageingpartyfiend]

I'm not sure what this question is leading to, exactly. Do you mean acceptable from a moral perspective? A societal perspective? A legal perspective?


On one hand I agree with them, it's never acceptable to plan suicide as (having been suicidal myself many times and even made several real attempts, at which I am eternally grateful that I failed). But I see where you're coming from too, that there are many situations where people may feel it is acceptable to plan suicide, therefore yes in that way it is subjective.

So it is sometimes acceptable then? As opposed to never? Who decides if it is or is not acceptable?

I honestly don't want to get into semantics, similar to yourself I suspect. But it's quite an important topic

I have known a few people make unsuccessful yet totally serious attempts too, and all of them highly grateful for the failure of their attempt (two of said survivals were basically miraculous twists of fate). I've also heard first hand accounts of the most ridiculous attempts too which must have had a 1% chance of working at best

I'm basically 100% sure that if I were to attempt it I'd succeed. I'm not planning on doing so, at least not for the forseeable future anyway. I wouldn't rule it out in certain circumstances though - but I'd make sure to talk to my loved ones about it first

 

[carbonhalo]

Thank you agingpartyfiend for seeing both sides of the question.

To whatever mod deleted my post.... So it's ok to call someone disingenuous but not alright to request no religion in the response?
I don't understand your reasoning.

@BourbonMac.
You're stating our brains are hardwired to want to die. I assume you meant live.

 

[BourbonMac]

I'm saying some of us have brains that are more wired towards thoughts and desires like this. Some days I want to live, some days I want to die. It's an angel and devil on the shoulder thing for me, the thought and idea of death is always there even if I do want to live and I realize with each passing day I may not see 30 in December. It all depends on how a lot of things go in the following month. Psychedelics, particularly DMT are able to keep these thoughts and desires away for a few days but unfortunately I won't have access to any more for at least another month.

 

[BourbonMac]

Had my 2nd acupuncture today, halfway home my right ear spikes outrageously. It's possible this is making it worse, the night of, my T spiked more in both ears than ever, I couldn't believe it. Maybe it gets worse before it gets better but so far I'm growing critical of this as a treatment and am only sticking to it out of desperation. Freaked out and sliced up my arm like an idiot... Hate this, hate how I react like this sometimes. I was having an alright day too, and I was very calm and relaxed last night, but now my day is totally fucked up.

 

[Senior Moderator]

Had my 2nd acupuncture today, halfway home my right ear spikes outrageously. It's possible this is making it worse, the night of, my T spiked more in both ears than ever, I couldn't believe it. Maybe it gets worse before it gets better but so far I'm growing critical of this as a treatment and am only sticking to it out of desperation. Freaked out and sliced up my arm like an idiot... Hate this, hate how I react like this sometimes. I was having an alright day too, and I was very calm and relaxed last night, but now my day is totally fucked up.

This situation is now bringing you to the point of self-harm. As if your situation wasn't serious enough already with how much trauma and constant stress it is putting you through, you are now self-harming as well. I am even more concerned for your immediate safety. I am pretty sure I have asked you this before but I am not sure it was answered, either that or I can't remember. Have you or would you see any type of counsellor or therapist, simply for some added support, to debrief what you are going through?

 

[BourbonMac]

I had been seeing someone for a little while, but eventually I got kind of tired of them. They were "challenging" but not in a way that was helping me after awhile, it's difficult for me to find someone I like. I've promised myself not to cut anymore, but that doesn't mean self-harm like behavior isn't still present. The night of that acupuncture I purposely did near an 8th of shrooms and had the worst, death like trip ever almost as punishment for how I was thinking and acting even though it wasn't all my fault.

2 days after my acupuncture I began to suffer immense abdominal pain. My tinnitus was actually quite a bit better in those days, it's back to being horrible due probably to low pressure which will be the case for another week... and I have my hearing test Wednesday. That's when I realized, it was the acupuncture. I was having mild stomachaches after my 1st procedure and often noted running would take it away, it'd also temporarily help my tinnitus. Today is the first day I haven't been doubled over in agony. The guy was putting needles all around my belly area and I have no idea why. There are specific acupuncture points for tinnitus yet the guy is sticking my stomach, knees, toes, wrists for no reason? I'm beginning to grow critical of his practice and think of all the people I could've picked, he might be the worst one I could've started with. There's no reason to needle someone's stomach for tinnitus.

I'm supposed to have my 3rd procedure tomorrow, I'm telling him to stay away from my stomach, and should also let him know there are other acupuncture points in my head that he isn't getting.

 

[BourbonMac]

Lovely, 3rd procedure went terrible. I didn't get stomach needles and my stomach is even worse. This is an insanely rare side effect that of course I would get in one of the only treatments that could possibly work. Fuck. My. Life.

 

[BourbonMac]

Well I went for a hard run which has never failed my stomach before, it did this time though. Feel absolutely like shit. When I look up abdominal pain and acupuncture I find like, 2 or 3 results on the entire internet, so apparently I'm just an unlucky fuck. I've also heard of 3 courses treating tinnitus before, so we'll see what happens... I just hope my stomach isn't totally shit tomorrow.

 

[Senior Moderator]

I had been seeing someone for a little while, but eventually I got kind of tired of them. They were "challenging" but not in a way that was helping me after awhile, it's difficult for me to find someone I like. I've promised myself not to cut anymore, but that doesn't mean self-harm like behavior isn't still present. The night of that acupuncture I purposely did near an 8th of shrooms and had the worst, death like trip ever almost as punishment for how I was thinking and acting even though it wasn't all my fault.

Maybe try a different therapist. I don't wanna harp on about it, if you're not willing to that's your choice. But personally, it took me like 6 different psychologists, 2 psychiatrists, countless counsellors, before I finally found a good psychologist that I meshed well with and did some good solid therapy work together with. So it can take a few goes before you find the right one for you. Since then (I stopped seeing her because I moved and she was too far away for me to commit to the sessions. The work we were doing together was getting more and more in-depth and more difficult for me to face, so I'd get half-way driving there and then chicken out. For me, seeing a therapist has to be REALLY convenient in terms of how easy it is for me to get there, fits in with my schedule etc, in order for me to not chicken out from facing the really tough therapy sessions, as I have a tendency to do). Anyway, might be worth another try.

I feel you on the very rare side effect thing by the way, I am really sorry that you seem to be one of the small percentage of people who have a bad stomach reaction to acupuncture. I'm not sure if you recall, but my chronic tinnitus was initiated as an extremely rare side effect of the particular antidepressant medication that I'm on. So I understand how frustrating it is to be one of the unlucky few...

 

[BourbonMac]

Which antidepressant is that? Most of them can cause tinnitus but oftentimes it's not listed as a side effect. I definitely had some mild tinnitus on any of the SSRI/SNRIs I took but it was never enough to bother me, because any amount of noise would cover it up. I can have 2 fans on max volume and still hear it...

Yeah, this really sucks... I mean it's astronomically rare, I found 2 or 3 people on the entire internet complaining of it, most pages are about it HELPING abdominal pain, not causing it so severely that I'm about to become anorexic just like I did in early 2022. I figured if I put something in my stomach it'd get better, nope. Not even a bowl of cheerios. I thought maybe today I'd be fine, I crapped multiple times last night and thought ok, maybe I was just blocked up, but no... I literally have a better chance at winning the lottery 10 times than the odds of this, it's ridiculous.

Not even Valium helps and that was taking care of abdominal distress even worse than this in early 2022 to the point where I could go from not being able to eat to being able to eat anything. I literally would've died from malnutrition without it, and unfortunately I'm still on it simply due to the anxiety over my ears. I was off of it last July but after being hospitalized briefly for suicidal ideation my GP put me back on it. Bold move of him to have pulled me off CT at any rate... If I didn't have Gabapentin I would've been in serious trouble. MJ helps but that just spikes my tinnitus worse so it's like, pick your poison.

 

[CFC]

Which antidepressant is that? Most of them can cause tinnitus but oftentimes it's not listed as a side effect. I definitely had some mild tinnitus on any of the SSRI/SNRIs I took but it was never enough to bother me, because any amount of noise would cover it up. I can have 2 fans on max volume and still hear it...

Yeah, this really sucks... I mean it's astronomically rare, I found 2 or 3 people on the entire internet complaining of it, most pages are about it HELPING abdominal pain, not causing it so severely that I'm about to become anorexic just like I did in early 2022. I figured if I put something in my stomach it'd get better, nope. Not even a bowl of cheerios. I thought maybe today I'd be fine, I crapped multiple times last night and thought ok, maybe I was just blocked up, but no... I literally have a better chance at winning the lottery 10 times than the odds of this, it's ridiculous.

Not even Valium helps and that was taking care of abdominal distress even worse than this in early 2022 to the point where I could go from not being able to eat to being able to eat anything. I literally would've died from malnutrition without it, and unfortunately I'm still on it simply due to the anxiety over my ears. I was off of it last July but after being hospitalized briefly for suicidal ideation my GP put me back on it. Bold move of him to have pulled me off CT at any rate... If I didn't have Gabapentin I would've been in serious trouble. MJ helps but that just spikes my tinnitus worse so it's like, pick your poison.

You might find this an interesting read:

Study shows promising treatment for tinnitus: An innovative treatment device tackles the hissing sound of silence

A double-blind randomized clinical trial of a device aimed at silencing the phantom sounds of tinnitus has yielded promising results.

www.sciencedaily.com

 

[Senior Moderator]

Which antidepressant is that? Most of them can cause tinnitus but oftentimes it's not listed as a side effect.

Duloxetine.

Definitely check out the study that CFC linked, as it's in the States, not like the one I've linked you a couple of times, which is based in Australia.