Take the following as a warning. I previous to this experience considered myself in control of every drug I ever take. I went from sober to plotting against my friend of 12 years and scraping dust off the floor in less than 12 hours and I don't even do this stuff often!
So we get to Alexanders house, sure enough its empty. Our lift drives off and we are alone in the middle of the country side with weed some drink and a modest and innocent little bag of Kat.
As soon as we get there we start sorting out the money problems, Alexander is pretty annoyed I owe him so much and now Ethan did as well. Eventually Ethan gave him the gram of Kat, and paid for half of it again so Alexander had to give half to me. We split it into two sections and start railing the shit I guess. They smoke a joint before we start but I live up to my promise to Ethan earlier that I am not smoking any weed today. Me and Alexander start on the Kat and soon it starts to kick in.
At first I am uncertain, but also Indifferent. I stand on top of a metal step the builders had left and start wondering if the Kat is working or not. Alexander feels a little buzz too.
Within minutes I'm ready to clean. Not sure what but I have to clean. My thinking is fairly clear, but also skittery and I am missing out a lot of small details. I'm talking a lot and I start piling plates in the dish washer. I don't want to scare Ethan who has started watching the hobbit or something on Alexander's laptop but he seems to high to care. He is smoking his weed fast. The more I clean the more mess I make, but a little less every time so eventually I manage to clean the entire kitchen/living room area. Fairly calm, just stimulated I attempt to watch the movie to no avail. I start watching the room and inanimate objects more than the screen and stop trying. I go back to the kitchen and start placing everything parallel to the counters.
Soon enough me and Alexander are using books as a ruler to make sure that the lamp is hanging down directly onto the middle of the table, moving the table back and forth trying to get it perfect. We start making stupid rules about how all doors have to stay permanently shut and when opening them we have to do so as quickly as possible so the doors are closed for the longest amount of times possible.
I have been taking a couple more lines but now I stop and start watching the movie. It feels like the movie had been on for so long, but not in a psychedelic sort of way. The film was in fact 2 and a half hours long which explained my irritance at the length of it. Eventually I sat down and started watching the film and start to make sense of what I was watching after 20 minutes or so. Me and Ethan start talking but he is too high to care about what I am saying to any real degree. As the Kat starts to wear off a little I get a little emotional. I start thinking classic isolated comedown thoughts and how I wasn't really close to anyone. But that soon wore off. I had some sort of epiphany (Which I link directly to the M-Kat.) about a lot of things.
I was the only one in my family not in therapy, My Mother, Father and Sister were all either on medication or seeing someone. The break up of my parents had been nasty and had been lingering on for over a year now. But That wasn't important at this point. As a result of this pretty hard break-up, I had moved on to better things.
Ethan's family had become like a second one to mine. I thought about how much time I spent in Ethans house. How friendly I was to his Parents and vice versa. Even the majority of the people I meet and know are as a direct result of Ethan and his Brother. I felt eternally happy and grateful for them, and managed to understand the odd attraction of Ethans house.
Even as I wrote this my Mother and Sister are both screaming and shouting at each other. My sister is mentally ruined, and turns all her anger inwards on her self and does a lot of damage, My Mother looks like she is on hard drugs and talks to her self and decides her emotions with her own words. She will start talking and by the end of her rant she has been through a cycle of screaming and burning anger to crying and self pity and then back to pure anger.
I dont have the capabilities or the desire to help either of them, and frankly its not my job. I am just avoiding the situation. I wanted to phone Ethans parents now and just explain to them how grateful I was and how healing they have been. If it wasn't for Ethan and his family I would likely be just as messy as the rest of my family.
Feeling pretty good about myself, I don't feel any urge to re-dose and feel satisfied with what I had done, no honestly! At that point I thought I was saving the Kat for another occasion.
So feeling content and even enlightened, I just chilled and did no other drugs for the rest of the night, Yeah Right I did!
After attempting to explain these feelings to Ethan who was really damn high at this point Alexander came in and started talking about how he thought his heart had stopped beating. Problem was he was being serious. He Started jumping around literally trying to jump-start his own heart and it was actaully pretty funny. I wandered over and attempted to assure him his heart was beating fine, just really fast as he had taken more Kat than me and smoked a tonne of weed. He wasn't having any of it and honestly believed his heart had stopped, but all I could do was explain to him he was in no danger. Through-out the rest of the day (and the next one) he would check his heart every few minutes just to make sure... Idiot...
So after that he didn't want to do any more Kat that night, which would of been a good thing, but me and Ethan had other plans. He went to bed and me and him decided that the night was far from over. So just to inhibit responsible behaviour and keep ourselves in the right frame of mind for railing some more Kat, we got drunk.
What started off as Beer pong quickly became Beer and Kat pong, and soon enough we were out of Kat. I was pretty wired this time, no urge to clean, I just felt like a squirrel with a robotic brain that just hot wired. Thats the best way to describe it. When you are drunk, a little tweaked and with a good friend in an empty house, the fiending gets really bad. Alexander still had his kat left, only like 0.3 but we wanted it, and we wanted it soon.
It was at this point that my wired fried wits were put up against a 12 year friendship with someone who hoards money like a magpie and wasnt really up for giving me his Kat. After moaning didn't work, me and Ethan were getting desperate and Alexander more and more agitated. Me and Ethan then spent a whole six hours straight attempting to get that Kat. Yeah that is desperate. This is a grand example of the level I will go to on my first time on the stuff in months just to get a few lines.
Eventually, through planning and planning I started telling him that I wanted to bin the Kat. That I wasn't leaving him alone with the stuff and if we had not flushed it by the time we got picked up in the morning I was going to tell my Mother that he had it and to take it off him. After 2 more persistent hours, me and Ethan finally cracked him, and managed to buy the Kat off him for a tenner down from his original offer of 20. This was at 4 in the morning.
By this point I was too tired and wasn't fiending so hard any more and decided to call it a day. We woke up first thing in the morning, and of course the first thing we did was rail the last of the Kat. I then started scraping crystals off every counter that had been in contact with Kat and started snorting anything I could find while Ethan who is more or less hooked on the herb did the same thing with his grinder.
No matter how strong you think you are, you will always find a way to make a perfectly "logical" exception at the time to get more of this stuff. Thank god I wasn't in town or I would have been off to get some more just like that.
So we get to Alexanders house, sure enough its empty. Our lift drives off and we are alone in the middle of the country side with weed some drink and a modest and innocent little bag of Kat.
As soon as we get there we start sorting out the money problems, Alexander is pretty annoyed I owe him so much and now Ethan did as well. Eventually Ethan gave him the gram of Kat, and paid for half of it again so Alexander had to give half to me. We split it into two sections and start railing the shit I guess. They smoke a joint before we start but I live up to my promise to Ethan earlier that I am not smoking any weed today. Me and Alexander start on the Kat and soon it starts to kick in.
At first I am uncertain, but also Indifferent. I stand on top of a metal step the builders had left and start wondering if the Kat is working or not. Alexander feels a little buzz too.
Within minutes I'm ready to clean. Not sure what but I have to clean. My thinking is fairly clear, but also skittery and I am missing out a lot of small details. I'm talking a lot and I start piling plates in the dish washer. I don't want to scare Ethan who has started watching the hobbit or something on Alexander's laptop but he seems to high to care. He is smoking his weed fast. The more I clean the more mess I make, but a little less every time so eventually I manage to clean the entire kitchen/living room area. Fairly calm, just stimulated I attempt to watch the movie to no avail. I start watching the room and inanimate objects more than the screen and stop trying. I go back to the kitchen and start placing everything parallel to the counters.
Soon enough me and Alexander are using books as a ruler to make sure that the lamp is hanging down directly onto the middle of the table, moving the table back and forth trying to get it perfect. We start making stupid rules about how all doors have to stay permanently shut and when opening them we have to do so as quickly as possible so the doors are closed for the longest amount of times possible.
I have been taking a couple more lines but now I stop and start watching the movie. It feels like the movie had been on for so long, but not in a psychedelic sort of way. The film was in fact 2 and a half hours long which explained my irritance at the length of it. Eventually I sat down and started watching the film and start to make sense of what I was watching after 20 minutes or so. Me and Ethan start talking but he is too high to care about what I am saying to any real degree. As the Kat starts to wear off a little I get a little emotional. I start thinking classic isolated comedown thoughts and how I wasn't really close to anyone. But that soon wore off. I had some sort of epiphany (Which I link directly to the M-Kat.) about a lot of things.
I was the only one in my family not in therapy, My Mother, Father and Sister were all either on medication or seeing someone. The break up of my parents had been nasty and had been lingering on for over a year now. But That wasn't important at this point. As a result of this pretty hard break-up, I had moved on to better things.
Ethan's family had become like a second one to mine. I thought about how much time I spent in Ethans house. How friendly I was to his Parents and vice versa. Even the majority of the people I meet and know are as a direct result of Ethan and his Brother. I felt eternally happy and grateful for them, and managed to understand the odd attraction of Ethans house.
Even as I wrote this my Mother and Sister are both screaming and shouting at each other. My sister is mentally ruined, and turns all her anger inwards on her self and does a lot of damage, My Mother looks like she is on hard drugs and talks to her self and decides her emotions with her own words. She will start talking and by the end of her rant she has been through a cycle of screaming and burning anger to crying and self pity and then back to pure anger.
I dont have the capabilities or the desire to help either of them, and frankly its not my job. I am just avoiding the situation. I wanted to phone Ethans parents now and just explain to them how grateful I was and how healing they have been. If it wasn't for Ethan and his family I would likely be just as messy as the rest of my family.
Feeling pretty good about myself, I don't feel any urge to re-dose and feel satisfied with what I had done, no honestly! At that point I thought I was saving the Kat for another occasion.
So feeling content and even enlightened, I just chilled and did no other drugs for the rest of the night, Yeah Right I did!
After attempting to explain these feelings to Ethan who was really damn high at this point Alexander came in and started talking about how he thought his heart had stopped beating. Problem was he was being serious. He Started jumping around literally trying to jump-start his own heart and it was actaully pretty funny. I wandered over and attempted to assure him his heart was beating fine, just really fast as he had taken more Kat than me and smoked a tonne of weed. He wasn't having any of it and honestly believed his heart had stopped, but all I could do was explain to him he was in no danger. Through-out the rest of the day (and the next one) he would check his heart every few minutes just to make sure... Idiot...
So after that he didn't want to do any more Kat that night, which would of been a good thing, but me and Ethan had other plans. He went to bed and me and him decided that the night was far from over. So just to inhibit responsible behaviour and keep ourselves in the right frame of mind for railing some more Kat, we got drunk.
What started off as Beer pong quickly became Beer and Kat pong, and soon enough we were out of Kat. I was pretty wired this time, no urge to clean, I just felt like a squirrel with a robotic brain that just hot wired. Thats the best way to describe it. When you are drunk, a little tweaked and with a good friend in an empty house, the fiending gets really bad. Alexander still had his kat left, only like 0.3 but we wanted it, and we wanted it soon.
It was at this point that my wired fried wits were put up against a 12 year friendship with someone who hoards money like a magpie and wasnt really up for giving me his Kat. After moaning didn't work, me and Ethan were getting desperate and Alexander more and more agitated. Me and Ethan then spent a whole six hours straight attempting to get that Kat. Yeah that is desperate. This is a grand example of the level I will go to on my first time on the stuff in months just to get a few lines.
Eventually, through planning and planning I started telling him that I wanted to bin the Kat. That I wasn't leaving him alone with the stuff and if we had not flushed it by the time we got picked up in the morning I was going to tell my Mother that he had it and to take it off him. After 2 more persistent hours, me and Ethan finally cracked him, and managed to buy the Kat off him for a tenner down from his original offer of 20. This was at 4 in the morning.
By this point I was too tired and wasn't fiending so hard any more and decided to call it a day. We woke up first thing in the morning, and of course the first thing we did was rail the last of the Kat. I then started scraping crystals off every counter that had been in contact with Kat and started snorting anything I could find while Ethan who is more or less hooked on the herb did the same thing with his grinder.
No matter how strong you think you are, you will always find a way to make a perfectly "logical" exception at the time to get more of this stuff. Thank god I wasn't in town or I would have been off to get some more just like that.