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  • TDS Moderators: AlphaMethylPhenyl | paranoid android

I think someone is out to get me (ALRIGHT)

xxsicknessxx

xxsicknessxx

Bluelighter
Joined
Jun 26, 2008
Messages
1,014
I deleted the thread because I read it all, I took in all the information, and there is nothing you all can do for me.

I will take your advise into consideration thank you.

Given my history I would say the same thing (he must be paranoid) I do know that at times someone has done something to mess with me (specifc things done that would only bother me) and only my parents my brother and my roomie know enough about me to do this. Out of them all I would point the direction at my roomie but I could be wrong.... it doesnt matter

Im going to wait and find a place I feel really good about with people I feel safe with, and im going to make sure spend a lot of time thinking about it. I need a affordable place, that I like, and Im not going to rush into moving into a place like I did last time (thats how I ended up here)

Thank you everyone for your information....

I clearly will seek all options. Medical, and real world solutions. Thanks
 
That sounds like a good idea xxsicknessxx. Speaking as someone with panic disorder and agoraphobia,it is just so important for your mental health that you have a home you can feel safe and secure in.Home is the place where we seek refuge from the world,and I know from experience how awful it is to share a house with someone you don't trust and don't feel comfortable with.
Best of luck <3
 
I know how paranoia is man. I don't trust anybody, and whenever someone tries to do something for me, I question why. What is their ulterior motive? It got so bad one time, that I was stoned, in my friends room with another friend.. and we have known each other for YEARS and have seen each other daily.. I had a lot of money in my wallet, like almost enough to buy a used car, and they knew this. Well, we were in his room and his lightbulb short circuited and it went pitch black. I immediately thought that they had planned this, and that they were going to attack me and rob me.. and if I could trust anyone in this world, it would be these people after all we've gone through together. I started having a panic attack. I kept saying "turn the light on! turn the light on!" and it was pitch black, all I could picture in my head was them preparing to jump me and take all my stuff. I flipped out and eventually ran out of the room. Of course, nothing of the sort was going to happen. There has been several other occasions similar to this involving paranoia and those closest to me.

I guess it's just that, I know how I think and feel.. and sometimes I become so cynical because of that.
 
Best of luck my friend. I'll always be here if you want someone to confide in and talk to. Lots of love your way <3 <3 Keep flying the straight and narrow and things will get better. In response to what you said earlier, I have had friends who dicked around with me when I was paranoid about certain issues in my life (like you said, dark secrets and whatnot). Just keep on keeping on.
 
Well true paranoia, you think everybody is going thru the same thing you are. When I had my episode in 05. I was certain that ppl could read my thought. Thoughtbroadcasting. it took 7 yr's to finally figure out that I was nuts. Thats today so to speak. Schizophernia can catch you off gaurd if you don't know the signs. It did with me. and now today I am more prepared incase it happens again.
 
I just wish peace for you sickness, however you find it. This must be such a tortured existance day after day, and a terrible way to live. Hang in there, I will keep praying for you!
 
OhCrap said:
I just wish peace for you sickness, however you find it. This must be such a tortured existance day after day, and a terrible way to live. Hang in there, I will keep praying for you!
Click to expand...

when I think like that, i just think of people who have it a lot worse then me, people in other countries sucking on stones because they have no food for the week... No matter how bad things get others have it worse... *shrug* it is what it is
Hopefully someday something works out in someway and things make sense, and I get a little happyness *shrug* I can hope!!
Plan for the worst hope for the best

2 years ago I was days from death drinking my self to death in a motel room... I wonder now... maybe I should of waited a few more days and I would be in a happier place now, I came through a lot sense then and for it to end up like this... just kinda makes me wonder why... why did everyone want me to get clean and sober and turn my life around if it was all set up to not end up with me with a life at all but feeling like im being electrocuted and persecuted and attacked...

Life is fucking weird
 
it doesn't sound like you have taken anyone's advice, to be honest - it sounds like you have rationalized it all away. i am going to ask you again: have you told your psychiatrist/therapist what you have told us here about thinking someone has rigged some kind of electric shock torture devices that follow you wherever you go? because something tells me you have not gone into the detail you have here with the professionals that could possibly help you.
 
point is I took that advise I saw doctors it didn't help, im going to keep seeing them and see if they can help any aspect of the problems I have. Im not giving up on them however Im now looking to do something real in my life that will fix lots of problems (such as lack of money) and I think a new location would be really good if its the right place for me. Maybe I just have bad memories here and its messing with me (shrug who knows) I don't let it get to me I just ... keep looking at different things in my life I can change I will keep doing so until I find what it is I need to change to live a normal happy life. like everyone else I have a right to the pursuit of happiness.

Just saying I closed the thread. You can't give me any more advise then the following.

1. see doctors
2. tell people around me what I think
3. Move

I tried 1. and 2. I am now looking at 3.

3. is something I can do that will change things right away instead of like meds where you might have to wait months to see effects...

Thank you all for your help. I will update you when things change.

P.S I am feeling tons better then some of my original posts, perhaps im just getting used to things I dunno but I am doing better.
 
Sometimed delusional disorders can be phasic/cyclical - they don't always manifest themselves all the time.
It could also be stress-linked.

How did doctors "not help"? It doesn't sound like you actually tried anything.
 
OP, I went through a similar thing to yourself. Psychosis is as real as the sun in the sky & it's almost impossible to identify until things start to slide somewhat

The fact you're questioning the attacks and such, means you're on the right path.

If you're using any substances (especially stims) it would be wise to stop using for a while and see if the attacks, persecution, etc stop happening.

For me it was intense cocaine abuse that led me to see people who weren't really there in my apartment.

I shouted at them, had fights with them. And even called the police; but it was only my sister who could work out what was really happening.

Since I stopped using blow in such a way everything has been cool.

I wish you all the best.
 
sekio said:
Sometimed delusional disorders can be phasic/cyclical - they don't always manifest themselves all the time.
It could also be stress-linked.

How did doctors "not help"? It doesn't sound like you actually tried anything.
Click to expand...

they perscribed meds for the fact that I get paralyzed (painfully) feeling like im being electrocuted at random times in different places. its frighting. and the meds didn't help I need to go back and explain it didn't help and we need try something else. I also got meds from my PSY to help with issues I was having but they didn't help with anything either I tried two different meds.

I dunno Like I said some of my issues can be helped in time im sure, but some of them must be real like my roomie doing things he knows make me paranoid saying specific things He knows will bother me adds to my problems.. once I move I know a lot of things will get better.. strait off the bat
 
Which meds did you try and for how long ? These things can take a long time to settle down and work as they should, months not weeks IME.
 
I think what it comes down to is you gotta keep trying new things till something works... I got lots of things still yet to try.
 
Hey Sickness, apologies of I come across as somewhat blunt, it's a failing in myself but one I find difficult to alter. You seem to sidestep questions you don't wish to answer even when they aren't in any way personal which leaves others filling in blanks with their own information, this does nothing to help you.

Almost anyone reading your posts is going to take the view that you are suffering from paranoid delusions, so the advice and reactions you get are going to come from that premise. I appreciate that you are far from convinced that that view is correct but go with it for a decent spell, say 6 months and see how you feel.

Go back to your doctors, explain how you feel again and that this has led you to not take your medication and that you want to give it another go, work with them even of at the moment you don't trust them. It really doesn't seem like you are in a good place to be making decisions about your own state of mind and the treatment you need.

Take care, I really hope things get better for you
 
Did you fix your problem yet? You mentioned somewhere that you take Abilify. That shit will make you crazy. My doctor prescribed it to me because I told him people annoyed the hell out of me and I get jumpy and really impatient. He told me it was to stabilize my mood. After a few days of having it in my system I was seeing things/hearing things that weren't there...it was horrible. I could have been commited I think at that point. I stopped taking it and the crazy delusions went away.
 
im looking to move.... I don't focus on fixing a problem that is out of my control, I will keep seeing doctors and trying to seek help through the medical field but in the mean time im going to fix things in my real life I know will help, Smoke less, get out more, move (to a safer location), try to be aware of my surrounding and whats going on around me what people are up to...

Given what has happened here sense I move in I know that someone did do some stuff to me, but I can't prove it, and its easy to dismiss it as parnoaia and there isn't much I can do but move and learn from the mistakes I made here and not remake the same mistakes. I will try my best


So no I didn't fix my problem, its not something I can fix :) however Im doing everything in my power to make things better as best as I can do and Im hopefull that once I move it will life a weight off my sholders I didn't know was there and I will once again sleep like normal and not feel like someone has there finger on a shocking button or something crazy like that...
I just have to many bad memories here that I know are causing my stress.... It won't get better until Im in a new location ...

Things are going better though then they were so im improving.
 
Good! I know how it feels to not be in control of the things around you and seems like others are ganging up. In life though, everything seems to come down around you at once and I think it is just a way to make you stronger. Good luck with everything (especially the smoking, doesn't even get you high)
 
<3 xxxsickness <3 :( I want peace for you. Please keep us updated on how you are doing.

Your posts do seem a lot better. I do hope you continue to improve whatever it may be that is ailing you <3.
 
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