I Think I'm Done With Coke

Jimmy_Pop

Bluelighter
Joined
Apr 28, 2012
Messages
91
OK, so if you read my previous posts you'll know that I have been a fairly regular coke user... Not exactly an addict but very, very high doses when I do use, which is once or twice a week.

Well, something happened:

I started saving money for a trip I had planned, and as it turned out, saving the necessary money kept me from buying any coke.

I didn't do any for like a month and a half.

I definitely slept better and seemed to enjoy better cardiovascular health, but I noticed something else too.

I developed a certain nostalgia for the stuff, and I never seemed to get horny.

So anyway this weekend, since I had already saved all the money I needed for the trip, I decided to go out and buy some gear.

I ended up buying 2 grams 2 nights in a row.

It was off the same dealer I always used to buy off, and it had the same face melting effects but... It just wasn't the same.

I didn't feel like I did what I wanted it to.

It was like it lost some of its magic.

I don't know what changed... The effects were the same but I just didn't enjoy them as much. I drank like 12 beer as well.

And I woke up the next day feeling genuinely awful... Like just terrible. Depressed and sick. A really bad booze and coke hangover is like nothing else. It's the biggest self-esteem killer ever, which is weird because I find most stimulant comedowns are disgusting, but they don't destroy your self image like the coke comedown does.

Anyway, I think I'm going to try to make the best of this negative experience and never do coke again.

I feel like I sort of get what the deal is with it, and I'm mostly "over" its (overrated) euphoria now.

Anyway, just had to get that out.

Peace.
 
Hey hey!
Im glad you are taking action against your cocaine use.. It truly is an awful substance.
I was experiencing very similar effects during my quitting phase..
Inside, you have made the decision that you don't want to use anymore.. It is a good thing.
I think cocaine has an awful power to detect this choice you have made, and now, every time you use, you will find that after a mere 10 minutes of happiness, your mind, body and soul will be driven to the ground.
This happened to me.. As soon as I actually knew that i was going to quit, it changed everything about the high & after effects.
It makes you feel like absolute trash.. Gets inside your head and manipulates you in to thinking the most f'd up thoughts which are not natural in any way..
Almost like the substance is punishing you for turning your back on it.
Pay attention to what these after effects are telling you. It is extremely obvious...
You gotta' kick it once and for all.
Good luck to you.
You will feel so much better once you are completely free.
 
Stimulant comedowns suck. I can personally attest to that. I had depression and anxiety that predated my drug use, and man, stimulant comedowns did not do me any favors. I hope you're feeling better! If you can, get a little bit of exercise and eat some proper meals. :)

Anyway, I know you say you're not an addict (I identify as such), and speaking from personal experience, practically all substances lost their magic for me a long time ago. I've had absolutely horrendous experiences and swore up-and-down that I was finished, but less than a week later I found myself suffering from psychological cravings. While I sincerely hope this doesn't happen to you, just be warned that it might. You might not succumb to the desire at first, but do not underestimate the mind's ability to distort. I'm not saying to live in fear of a "relapse" or anything like that, so I hope that's not what I sound like. Wish you all the best, and don't be afraid to reach out if the urge to do it again comes creeping back!
 
OK, so if you read my previous posts you'll know that I have been a fairly regular coke user... Not exactly an addict but very, very high doses when I do use, which is once or twice a week.

Well, something happened:

I started saving money for a trip I had planned, and as it turned out, saving the necessary money kept me from buying any coke.

I didn't do any for like a month and a half.

I definitely slept better and seemed to enjoy better cardiovascular health, but I noticed something else too.

I developed a certain nostalgia for the stuff, and I never seemed to get horny.

So anyway this weekend, since I had already saved all the money I needed for the trip, I decided to go out and buy some gear.

I ended up buying 2 grams 2 nights in a row.

It was off the same dealer I always used to buy off, and it had the same face melting effects but... It just wasn't the same.

I didn't feel like I did what I wanted it to.

It was like it lost some of its magic.

I don't know what changed... The effects were the same but I just didn't enjoy them as much. I drank like 12 beer as well.

And I woke up the next day feeling genuinely awful... Like just terrible. Depressed and sick. A really bad booze and coke hangover is like nothing else. It's the biggest self-esteem killer ever, which is weird because I find most stimulant comedowns are disgusting, but they don't destroy your self image like the coke comedown does.

Anyway, I think I'm going to try to make the best of this negative experience and never do coke again.

I feel like I sort of get what the deal is with it, and I'm mostly "over" its (overrated) euphoria now.

Anyway, just had to get that out.

Peace.

im addicted to coke to and doing a gram in 2 grams in 2 nights is waaayy to much. Thats why you feel so depressed. coke has anti depressant qualities and if you fill you body with that then suddenly stop all you serotonin will be gone and you will feel depressed. If your going to use coke (as hard as this will be) keep is to a .5 a night max. At most once a week. Even thats to much. try for once a month
 
Hey hey!
Im glad you are taking action against your cocaine use.. It truly is an awful substance.
I was experiencing very similar effects during my quitting phase..
Inside, you have made the decision that you don't want to use anymore.. It is a good thing.
I think cocaine has an awful power to detect this choice you have made, and now, every time you use, you will find that after a mere 10 minutes of happiness, your mind, body and soul will be driven to the ground.
This happened to me.. As soon as I actually knew that i was going to quit, it changed everything about the high & after effects.
It makes you feel like absolute trash.. Gets inside your head and manipulates you in to thinking the most f'd up thoughts which are not natural in any way..
Almost like the substance is punishing you for turning your back on it.
Pay attention to what these after effects are telling you. It is extremely obvious...
You gotta' kick it once and for all.
Good luck to you.
You will feel so much better once you are completely free.


As a coke addict. I could not have said this any better.
 
Good luck with quitting the coke<3<3.. my best advice to anyone trying to quit coke is get a notebook and every time you get the urge to do it, write down how you think it will feel and then write down how it actually feels.. addiction takes a snapshot of the time when you get the rush.. the rest of the time on coke sucks that why people constantly re up.. write down how you feel during the entire time. Keep all the entries in a row. when you want to get it the next time or start fiending read your entries from the beginning to the end.. coke, she always whispers to you how she is going to make you feel like a god again, SHE LIES, if you look at the journal enough times you will start to see her for the dirty lying skank she is.. other than that you just need impulse control for when she jumps out of a crowd or you walk into a room where her disease ridden body is laying around.. Hope this helps in your quest to quit giving that demand all your money to feel like shit.. worked for me=D and my habit was EXCRUCIATINGLY large:( Best of luck and do the best you can until you figure out how to do better.


oh and put this at the top of the note book or where ever you are writing it down;)

Fiction Disclaimer

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, businesses, organizations, places, events and incidents either are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.
Also note that my works generally contain sexual themes, objectionable language and behavior which should be avoided by most human beings. If you are easily offended, unable to discern the difference between the written word and reality, dislike the use of profanity, uptight, or “saved” to the point where reading this material may pose danger to your immortal soul, then you should immediately cease reading any further and step away from whichever medium you have chosen to digest my work.
The author accepts no responsibility for any thoughts you may form after reading his works.:)
 
Top