I think i have a drug problem.

[sidthesloth]

So i'm 17, I think drugs are a positive tool for recreation, self-discovery, personal development and creativity.

I however think that i need to stop getting fucked up. I have had the compulsive need to feel fucked up since an early age but recently i see that it has become destructive and i could achieve more recreation, self-discovery, personal development and creativity from using drugs in a controlled, less frequent, sensible way.

I use cannabis daily with occassional breaks of no longer than a week and have done for over a year, at the weekends i will spend all my money getting messed up on a selection of drugs (alcohol, cocaine, codeine, diazepam, mxe, ketamine, 2 cb, lsd, mdma, amphetamines, anything really) I have always been rebellious and a free spirit, but hopefully i can still mantain my radical thinking and actions without NEEDING drugs to make me who I am. I have always half assed said i'd stop being so wreckless but i think its about time i really did.
I dont plan to cut drugs out of my life completely but merely stop using them for long enough to regain the respect and responsibility i should have when using them. I'm planning a month of total sobriety. This SUCKS as its christmas time and i want to be out having fun with my friends which i've never been able to do sober. I've grown up with drugs and alohol being the center of my enjoyment and christmas has always been a time for getting drunk but i know "there is no persponing war, there is only delaying it to the advantage of the enemy" so i need to do this i think. I'm just hoping to get some support from the people here who might have similar experiences and can honestly say they are responsible drug users.

 

[herbavore]

I have always been rebellious and a free spirit, but hopefully i can still mantain my radical thinking and actions without NEEDING drugs to make me who I am.
.

Hi sid,

what a great post! Welcome to TDS. I would start by taking the word "hopefully" out of the above sentence and use it as my mantra at the start of every day. Of course you can maintain your radical thinking and actions as that is who you are, on or off drugs. Questioning what drugs mean in your life is a very healthy thing to do.

Taking a long break sounds like a really good strategy and many people use threads like this to both get responses and support from others as well as a sort of check-in for themselves. You report your progress, we cheer you on!

I love your quote about "no postponing war...."

One last thought: some of the drugs you cited can be addictive so be wary of stories on this site or any other that describe responsible use. Someone else may be able to control their usage now, but not over time; or they may be able to completely control it while you may not (everyone is different). Just be aware that someone's anecdote on the internet is just that--their story, no more , no less.

Here is my story to start it off. I gave up drugs altogether when I was about your age after heavy abuse of anything and everything that was around. I just got tired of my whole life centering around getting, taking and recovering from stuff to get me high. That was now 40 years ago! Some of my friends couldn't handle my stopping but most never missed a beat. My friends now are drug users and non-drug users--it's not a factor in our friendships one way or the other.

I've been a lifelong proponent of legalization of all drugs mostly because I don't believe in making criminals out of people that choose to put a substance in their body either for fun or to self-medicate. I haven't missed drugs in my life for a second, though I have over the past five years started using pot both medicinally for sleep as well as recreationally once in a blue moon.

 

[n3ophy7e]

Hi sid, I have to say that at only age 17, it is so fantastic that you've already recognised that your drug use may become a serious issue for you. It can take some people decades to realise that about their drug use. Seriously man, massive kudos to you for admitting that to yourself!

I sincerely wish you all the best with your month of sobriety. You have indeed chosen a very tricky month to be sober so if you slip up, don't be too hard on yourself okay? Just get right back on the wagon and keep going with your sobriety

What alternative activities do you have planned for this month? Have you also got a plan for if/when you get really strong cravings to get high?? The more prepared you are to deal with those moments, the more likely you are to stay sober.

And of course, please let us know how you're going and feel free to ask us for advice! Good luck

 

[LOGan1314]

You seem to be very mature and wise for a 17-year old. You need to spread this knowledge to your friends. Having a "drug problem" is very subjective from person to person. Congratu fucking lations on realizing what you have already realized. Try exercising harder or something like joining a basketball league or some time of activitiy that enhances your mood. Good luck my friend.

 

[sidthesloth]

Thanks everyone. I plan on exercising alot more instead of getting high, I'll still attend the same functions as normal which will be tricky as there is drugs at all social occasions i'm involved in. Just going to try and get into the music alot more when i'm at a music event this weekend instead of taking any drugs. May have a few drinks this weekend, but i'm not sure if it will start with a few drinks and snowball into me just giving up.

 

[Flabu]

I agree with everything that has been said already. You sound very mature for being only 17.

I would just like to chime in, if you have been smoking pot daily for over a year and stop, you will immediately know the difference! People say pot is harmless, but it DOES alter your thinking and state of mind, regardless of what people want to say or think. I myself find it to not be harmless for these reasons. Good work though and good luck on your month off of drugs!

 

[Alex000]

If you only have intentions on being sober for a month, I'd set a more attainable goal. Perhaps stick to weed, or use much more sparingly. If you plan on long-term sobriety, that is a different story.

 

[shady4091]

I'd say stay away from alcohol for now, especially since you seem to already recognize that it may (and does) weaken your resolve. During my period of somewhat heavy MDMA use it was ALWAYS alcohol that made me give in. I would go out every weekend with the intention of not taking any but after a few drinks I'm asking all my friends where to find some...

Other than that it seems like you have a good head on your shoulders and I believe you can do this if you really want to. Best of luck, man.

 

[LOGan1314]

^^ This +1.....if i am sober i can refuse anything offered....if drunk or even a little tipsy...i give in.

 

[sidthesloth]

Fuck it man. I'm giving up the harder shit, but i don't want to stop smoking and drinking, if i only do it socially its really not that bad. Definately being alone makes my loneliness and overthinking alot worse and make write stuff like this.

 

[herbavore]

^ sounds like you are backing off of your original resolve because it is getting hard. It is going to be hard because...

I've grown up with drugs and alcohol being the center of my enjoyment

It's one month, one day at a time, a few hours at a time. Don't talk yourself out of something that could impact your life in such a positive way. I think you will feel so much stronger and in control of your life if you stick with your plan.

 

[fivelinefury]

Hey sid, firstly as others have said you sound very switched on for 17. It took me until age 24-25 to actually admit to myself that I had drug problems 8) So that in its self is a great step learning so young. It is a very hard time of the year for a lot of people trying to keep clean and sober, or as sober as possible, and I quite often relapse myself every year at around this time due to the anxiety of christmas gatherings, etc. Just remember if you do end up drinking and/or using to try and not over trash yourself too much (I can't talk haha). And even more importantly, don't beat yourself up over relapses, because the fact is they do happen and each time they do we learn from them. Taking things day by day is a good way to go. If you stuff up for 1 or 2 days, then that is only 1 or 2 days out of your whole life that you've stuffed up. Good luck m8! And if you find it too hard all during this month, then maybe it could become a new years resolution for next year!

 

[Ds]

Hey dude good to see that you reckonize that you have a problem. I know for the longest time that was the hardest thing i could do.
I'm guessing that you have reached your bottom.. that something in your life happened for you to notice that your drug doing was hurting you and your love ones and friends. Your still really young man and your body isnt finished growing yet. I think that this will be a good time for you to stop using.
Is there anything that you are physically addicted to? Like if you don't have any then you will become sick. If thats the case you can read up on detoxing yourself or look into detox/hospitals in the city you live in.
Theres a lot of charities out there that are affiliated with hospitals that will pay for your detox. You can also read up on bluelight on how to detox your self, even use google.
What helped me early on was keeping a journal of my progress, and i choose to start a blog here on bluelight, feel free to read it.
I wish you the best of luck in your recovery, remember easy does it, and just for today you don't have to use.

 

[max_]

Hey man, I think it's great that you decided to do this now with christmas coming and everything. It'll be a great test of you actual commitment with the issue. Just find something else to fill the gap drugs will leave and if you need to stay away from some people do not hesitate on doing so. drugs will still be there when you're done with your self discovery. You might not be there when drugs are done with you. Good luck.

 

[persianslipper]

Thanks everyone. I plan on exercising alot more instead of getting high

This. So much this. If you aren't used to a lot of exercise (you may be, but many smokers aren't), definitely start small. Push yourself until right before you hit your limit, then go a tiny bit more. Running will give you a nice endorphin high for a little while, and all forms of exercise can be regenerating, even neuroprotective. I like to take sobriety breaks, and I always ramp up my routine. It gives me a way to experiment with my body chemistry without introducing foreign substances.

I'll still attend the same functions as normal which will be tricky as there is drugs at all social occasions i'm involved in. Just going to try and get into the music alot more when i'm at a music event this weekend instead of taking any drugs. May have a few drinks this weekend, but i'm not sure if it will start with a few drinks and snowball into me just giving up.

I hate to say this, but if you're really intent on the sobriety thing, it will be extremely difficult to do while still in the "scene." There will be intense pressure to use, unless you have friends who are extremely supportive. For the first week or so, you might use your newfound sober time to detox and treat your body well. After the w/d is over, maybe treat yourself to some non-drug pleasures o' life.

Restating what others here have said, please realise that what you are considering is a Very Good Idea, and you should be proud of yourself for even thinking of it. Because that means even if you decide now isn't the time for you to take a break, the idea has been planted. Ideas are very powerful.

Good luck!

 

[sidthesloth]

I wasn't going to go on the break, but I had a binge over christmas and then on new years i had a wierd experience on acid.
But it helped, it showed me a break is the right thing to do, i've been sober for a week and i feel ridiculously healthy, been doing loads of exercise and i've started playing drums again. things are going good thanks for all your support

 

[herbavore]

that is great news, sid! You are going to feel even better next week and beyond so keep it up. Congratulations on coming back to the whole idea after abandoning it once; lots of people would've just given up trying.

 

[CHiLD-0F-THE-BEAT]

Great to hear things are going well! It's important to remember how good you're feeling at the moment, having been sober for a week. It will help you to stay in control and achieve your sobriety goals.

Keep it up!

 

[Starshowers]

I wasn't going to go on the break, but I had a binge over christmas and then on new years i had a wierd experience on acid.
But it helped, it showed me a break is the right thing to do, i've been sober for a week and i feel ridiculously healthy, been doing loads of exercise and i've started playing drums again. things are going good thanks for all your support

Don't forget to give the psychedelic some credit. Acid especially - is a wonderful tool for treating addictions. In Leary's studies, he cured 90% of alcoholics tested for one year with acid-therapy!

 

[fakeplastictrees4]

I feel the same way, seems like we're in very similar positions. I'm 17 as well and do anything I can get my hands on. I know that no matter how many times I tell myself I'm not going to drink or I'm not going to do anymore mdma, it always snowballs the second I say "well maybe just one drink"

Good job on being sober for a week man.