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I think I found a place I fit into finally!

Nikkibayos

Greenlighter
Joined
May 6, 2013
Messages
11
Location
Indiana
Hi everyone,
My name is Nikki and I'm 35 years old. I'm married and have 3 boys. I have been diagnosed with PTSD and depression. However, due to personal reasons, I am unable to see a psychiatrist. Therefore, I do not have a prescription for any medications. I have had some dependency of vicodin and alcohol in the past. I try to eat healthy and keep active and workout regularly....but, there are days...like today...I simply cannot. I have tried desperately to find things online that can help. St. John's wart didn't help. Phenibut didn't help....made me worse and withdrawal was unbelievable. Relacore didn't help. Neurontin helps somewhat, but I need a 3000 mg dosage or higher to feel calm. I'm desperate. I'm beginning to have anxiety attacks. I don't have them frequently, but approximately 4 or 5 a year. I have night sweats. I have severe bouts of sadness...omg...I'm a mess. I'm getting depressed just re-reading my introduction. I'm planning to order L-Theanine, Velerian or Mulungo. What would anyone suggest? I'm open to any and all suggestions. I need help and I cannot go to the doctor. 8) Thank everyone!
 
I'll quickly add that I have tried Kratom, but I didn't really have success with that either. I tried both capsules and powder. I would become "chatty" for about 15 minutes and then I'd become nauseous. I just want something to help me relax and calm down. Something that actually works. Thanks!
 
Hi, welcome Nikki.

If you're going to go the herbal route, you need nervines. Things like lemon balm, kava kava, perhaps some passionflower. Look those up, acquire some, see if it helps! Best of luck to you.
 
Hi Nikki,
I suffered a pretty serious PTSD episode 25 years ago, and for personal reasons I could not deal with it through a psychiatrist either, even though we had coverage. For me, the only thing that helped (other than cognitive therapy based self-help) was hiking. The high from self-manufactured drugs (endorphins), plus dancing along the rills and ridges of the local wilderness areas, gradually brought me to wellness. Still does. It was a very rough time, and without the physical activity, in a natural setting, I do not know how I would have gotten through it, even with a very supportive family and social network. Strangely enough, there were jewels hidden amidst the shards of broken glass. But finding them required perspective. And distance. Ages and ages hence, I am actually thankful for the experience; it changed me in positive ways I never believed would be possible. Good luck and Godspeed to you.:)
 
Do a google search for etizolam, phenazepam, gbl... Any of these 3 may or may not be able to help you with PTSD. I know a few people that have personally tried etizolam/phenazepam for PTSD/depression/anxiety and have told me it works wonders. It might be worth looking into!
 
How about we don't start the new lady off on a hunt for dodgy internet benzo's, good lord have mercy.
 
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