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I think I died when I over did heroin...literally.

L

Link00

Greenlighter
Joined
Sep 8, 2015
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18
I would like some input on my experience and would also like to know if anybody has ever encountered a situation like this or felt what I am about to share with you. It's somewhat long so thank you in advance for taking the time to read it...I just need to talk to somebody about this and vent I guess. A couple of months back I lost my job. I had a very heavy hydrocodone habit. I was taking between 30 to 50 hydrocodone pills a day. Either 7.5/325's or the 10/325's. Some days I found oxy's or morphine pills and used that. But when I lost my job my habit became too expensive to maintain. So I switched to tar h, as that is what is mainly available here in my region of texas. At first I wasn't doing much because I was somewhat afraid of what I was using, but as I became more and more familiar with the tar my intake rose dramatically. I went from a dime or dub a day, to half a gram or more in a matter of days. On several occasions, late at night, I would do so much that I would become super dazed and would nod off and obviously I would fall asleep. In my nod or sleep, whatever you want to call it, I would be in complete darkness and I saw nothing whatsoever. I only felt my mind working. And as I lay in complete darkness I would try to take command of my body but It wouldn't respond, I always tried and tried until I started to think "im asleep... I have to wake up". In the same futile manner as I would try to move my body, I could not get myself to wake up. It was so exasperating as I had no control of anything, all I could do was think. It was as if my mind and my body had been disconnected and no matter how hard I tried to have them click together, they wouldn't. So there I was in complete emptiness trying and trying to wake myself up. Suddenly I felt that desperation of taking a breath of air right after getting it knocked out by getting hit in the gut. I would wake up with a jolt of electricity running down my spine in a dark room. Dazed and confused and obviously scared and in panic I would stand up and frantically look for a source of light, the light switch, anything. All the meanwhile I didn't know where I was, who I was, what was happening or what I was doing. Then as I got to turn something on that provided light I would run to a mirror look at myself and I would suddenly realize what had just happened. I would lay awake scared to go to sleep but eventually I would fall asleep and wake up normally. But I always feel as if I died on those nights, as if my body ceased to perform it's duties and the only thing working was my mind. As if my spirit...my soul left my body and after realizing something was wrong i would return to my body but obviously in shock and disoriented because of what had just happened. Any input guys/girls? I'm being dead serious, and no I'm not trolling.
 
I've never taken that huge amount of opiates, but I once had an out of body experience while on ketamine. It felt like when you wake up from a dream but you can't move your body, you can only open your eyes and you feel paralyzed. I'd imagine this may be a wake up call for you usage.
 
See I've kept using, it happened multiple times but eventually I guess my body got use to that much dope and I stopped having those experiences. But they definitely got me scared so ever since I've been telling myself I have to quit cause opiates are ruining my life, if I keep going on the path ive lead they're going to be the end of me pretty soon.
 
See one of the symptoms of opiate OD is the body's complete lack of breathing. Opiates will shut down your respiratory system, and that's why I think I felt the air come back as if somebody had just knocked it out of me, because I had completely stopped breathing. @Tanner Blaze
 
Sounds like sleep paralysis. Its happened to me, not while doing drugs a handful of times. Its very scary bc your mind is awake but your body is sleeping. I remember screaming inside my head to my roommate "shake me shake me!" Google it
 
The thing is my3sons is that I've experienced sleep paralysis before. And this felt completely different, but then again I wasn't on h when Ive experienced the sleep paralysis before so maybe it was that... with a lil kick of heroin haha.
 
I sent you a PM...it's similar to something I experienced when I blacked out and hit the ground one day. Only drugs I'd done before then were prozac and a brief experiment with seroquel for depression (horrible idea). I experienced a LOT of freaky scary stuff after that and after reading your post I'm wondering who else has gone through this.

Sleep paralysis is a diff thing, a diff feeling. It's really common and is related, afaik, to your body going to that state before your mind does.
 
I don't know man. Any time I have experienced what I feel like was an OD I would just be like blacked out for the most part I guess is the only way to describe it. I remember this one time really really vividly. I did too much I knew I did before I finished the shot. Shit I knew I was probably doing too much before I even had the damn needle in me. Anyways, after I did it and took the needle out I instantly could tell something bad was going to happen. I was alone at my place at the time too and the doors were locked. Well I kept telling myself I need to keep my eyes open I just need to keep my eyes open if I close my eyes something really bad is going to happen. It even got to the point where I was physically trying to hold my eyes open. Well as you can imagine that was not successful for very long... I fell out for like 4 hours, waking up halfway on my bed halfway off on the floor to my roommate banging on the front door to let him in and my uncapped needle laying in my bed. I can't say I had that feeling you did. It almost just felt like what it would be like I have always imagined if you did die. Absolutely nothing. Completely black. No sense of myself or thoughts or feelings of not being able to move my body, Like at that moment until I woke up my mind my spirit my body was not even a thing. I truly believe that if it wasn't for me using my roommates knock as a teather to reality or maybe even if he would of came a few hours later I would be dead right now. When I woke up from that I felt so weird. I felt like I cheated death and almost like I wasn't suppose to be here anymore after that.
EXjunkiegirl23
 
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