I ruined my life(18m)

[ChemicallyEnhanced]

I wish I never did drugs im such a retard. I started doing meth at 17, now I’m so mentally I’ll and alone all the time, while other 18 year olds are maybe drinking for the first time in college. I fucked up my whole life, lost my dignity and everything. Maybe I am genetically inferior I feel like all hope is lost. I’ve been 4 months sober but I can’t live with this, what my life became. What do I do?

Nahh, you'll be fine
At 18 your life has very barely begin. At your age I was drinking two pints of vodka and four bottles of wine a day and by 19 I was homeless, still drinking that much and also prostituting and addicted to opioids.
It can and does always get better.
I've been sober from alcohol for 5 years now, btw.

Are you currently 4 months sober? If so, that's AMAZING. If not, you can do it again!

I'd see a doctor about anti-depressants if I were you. Sounds like you need 'em and personally they (Zoloft) absolutely saved my life.

 

[Jerry Atrick]

When I started using meth, I was 17 year old junior in high school, and I stayed skipping school and didn’t turn in any assignments and just quit going back in may, I haven’t been back since, and my motivation ever since I quit is so low, a typical day for me is driving around or going to the gym. My goal right now is to just stay sober, but I’m working towards a ged and becoming more mentally stable. I feel like I can’t enjoy college now, since post meth I have a hard time enjoying anything

There's your goal. Work on getting your GED first. When you accomplish that, maybe think about community college if college is what you want to do. Remember, Rome wasn't built in a day. I would just keep taking baby steps toward your goals no matter how tiny or lofty they are. Any progress big or small is better than no progress. In my opinion, working toward life goals is a realistic way to beat drug addiction because it gives you a tangible reason not to use.

I don't know where you live but EVERYONE is hiring where I live and almost all of the entry level or part time jobs only require a high school diploma/GED. Hell, I have a master's degree and have left that and my bachelor's off my resume just to score hourly jobs.

Like others have said, sometimes a good psychiatrist can work wonders at helping someone achieve mental stability.

 

[Nas47]

I wish I never did drugs im such a retard. I started doing meth at 17, now I’m so mentally I’ll and alone all the time, while other 18 year olds are maybe drinking for the first time in college. I fucked up my whole life, lost my dignity and everything. Maybe I am genetically inferior I feel like all hope is lost. I’ve been 4 months sober but I can’t live with this, what my life became. What do I do?

Hey man,first honestly i don'think you are mentally ill.You are so young and without much years of abuse.Easily can transform your life.Called it just bad period,that you must go through it.Crystal is a bad for a young brain.If you are sober four months its a victory.Go bravely toward.Can stay a year sober,if you want to.You pass sucefully first half.Don't give up..withbGod' help!

 

[Robi]

I wish I never did drugs im such a retard. I started doing meth at 17, now I’m so mentally I’ll and alone all the time, while other 18 year olds are maybe drinking for the first time in college. I fucked up my whole life, lost my dignity and everything. Maybe I am genetically inferior I feel like all hope is lost. I’ve been 4 months sober but I can’t live with this, what my life became. What do I do?

we are here for you no matter what,life has started for you,,you aint seen nothing yet! but i feel your anguish, try to open and really listen to these gents

 

[SomeRandomNob]

I wish I never did drugs im such a retard. I started doing meth at 17, now I’m so mentally I’ll and alone all the time, while other 18 year olds are maybe drinking for the first time in college. I fucked up my whole life, lost my dignity and everything. Maybe I am genetically inferior I feel like all hope is lost. I’ve been 4 months sober but I can’t live with this, what my life became. What do I do?

That sucks dude, I understand how terrifying this can be, I did the same thing when I was your age, I developed psychosis and pretty scary hallucinations that lasted almost two years, and was extremely depressed and suicidal for at least three years afterwards.

I promise you that if you put faith in something bigger than yourself, not necessarily god but, the environment, the technological cannon, your community, something that will out live you personally and is more important than any individual, you can find the motivation to work hard, and on that path you will find personal happiness.

You've been blessed with the curse that is extreme drug addiction quite early, this is a mountain you must now climb, but I promise you the view from the top of this seemingly insurmountable challenge will make the word beautiful itself seem ugly in comparison. There is a blindingly bright light at the end of this miserable tunnel, but it will take sacrifice and patience to reach, I wish you the best of luck, stay strong.