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  • TDS Moderators: AlphaMethylPhenyl | paranoid android

i really need help ppl : (

Dump her. Be a man, do the responsible thing and dump her. You are only 24, she's only 20. You said seeing her hurt makes you feel bad- perhaps you have some issues regarding self-esteem that has driven you to use in the first place?

I know because I have had a similar experience- my using was a result of putting myself in bad relationships with people and not looking out for myself.

No one can make you do anything...make the right choice.
 
totach said:
i dont know what to do i know this should be in the SLR forum but im so used to you guys in this forum but basically i dont know what to do my girl basically canot deal with the selffishnes i am doing to her right now in this hard time for me as i am kicking a 5 year heroin habit i am 24 she is 20 we hav bin living together for over a year but i feel like she might drive me to use again because shes telling me i dont ask her how her day was and so on and i keep telling her babe im hurting right now like what the fuck youve bin wit me for over a year im finally clean for 10 dAys like work with me i really do love this girl but i dont know what to do i feel like if we didnt live together then it would be allright i feel like she just doesnt wanna break up cuz she doesnt wanna move back home im so fucking confused i dont know what to do im bugging out cuz i hate to see her hurting its killing me but at the same time its fucking with my sobriety so what should i do please help guys by the way she hates bluelight n thinks were all druggies n shit n i always praise bluelight u guys know i love all of u with all my heart you ppl helped me so much some of u dont even know how much u helped me but anyone that ever posted here trust me u helped me in some way please giv me ur opinions on what i should do keep in mind i love this girl but shes fucking wit my sobriety what should i do?
ps:i love evreyone on bluelight ur like family n even tho im so sad right now ima still put a smile face cuz i know u ppl will help me : )
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Talk to her. Tell her that you need support more than ever. Tell her that you want to make her happy, but you cannot do that until you get clean. And to get clean, you need to be kept calm and not stressed out.

If she is worth loving, she will understand.

Edit: Oh yeah, and congratulations on the 10 days. Definitely try to keep it up, you're doing good. I found that the best thing to do was to take my mind off of things. I'd go see a movie, go to a friend's house or go see my family. That usually kept me busy for a day, and the cravings were over.
 
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thanx again evrey1 so as of now we are i really hav no clue still : ) but she defenetly loosened up especially after she read this thread sheyyttt!!!!! i made her swear not to ever read my bluelight posts but she still did neways and it actually wound up being a good thing anyways today is day 14 clean so ig uess we can close this thread thanx for all ur support guys/girls u really ehlped me so much : )
 
Draigan said:
wtf why is everyone saying drop her? She doesn't know any better. my mom was liek that to me too. It didn't mean she didnt care.

Just deal with it bro. Its painful as fuck. 10 days is amazing. Dont go back!! plzz
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EXACTLY you said it yourself..."She doesnt know any better." I never accept ignorance as an excuse, because it is a very poor one. She is younger than him, hence less mature, less understanding, and you cannot get clean unless you can get the facts through her thick skull. She must mature very fast or she will probably never know what the OP is going through, Therefore how can she support him through the rest of the mental W/D process if she thinks hes totally detoxed in ten days?

Ignorance is most definitely not bliss, just frustration

Its all your call op, no one knows her as well as you.
 
^
thanx man i really read what u wrote a bunch of times but draigan is also right anyways ya today its offcial i chaged my facebook status lol this is gonna be tough but i think its best not just for me but for her also thanx so much to all of u
 
damn this is really hard on me : ( . i dont like coming home 2 a empty house n my only hobbies is playing cards.so for the past week ive bin getting mad drunk in the park playing poker wit the old geezers. i dont know what else to do im so bored. i havent bin bored for 5 years this sux. but this is also best for her i guess i just wish i didnt love her so much. we agreed to stay friends do u guys think thats a good idea?
 
totach said:
^
thanx man i really read what u wrote a bunch of times but draigan is also right anyways ya today its offcial i chaged my facebook status lol this is gonna be tough but i think its best not just for me but for her also thanx so much to all of u
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I understand. the more advice, the better. All I want is for you to stay clean and stay strong, because I sure as hell know what youre going through. :)
 
^
thanx man,bluelight is the sheyyttt!!! for advice im still clean 2day is 3 weeks : )
 
you should talk to her about it, and if she doesnt wanna help then i hate to tell you this buddy but if you love someone let them go. Ive had to let alot of people go, and its hard, but you will get through. I think your health is very important and if she loves you she will see that too. :) Keep smiling :)
 
xxbrokenxx said:
you should talk to her about it, and if she doesnt wanna help then i hate to tell you this buddy but if you love someone let them go. Ive had to let alot of people go, and its hard, but you will get through. I think your health is very important and if she loves you she will see that too. :) Keep smiling :)
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A little late on that one. Where bouts in Toronto are ya? Got MSN?
 
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