I overdosed two days ago

[Nepenthe91]

So I've been treading water all summer addiction wise- no heroin but monthly klonopin, adderall, occasional vicodin and daily narijuana use. Sounds like a lot but I was happy and productive. Then for some ungodly reason I went looking to score. Found some old dudes who seemed in the know, copped a short bag (whatya gonna do, y'know?) and quite stupidly did a large and potent shot. It took a minute to hit, but when it did it was like fucking pure heaven. I don't remember shit else except waking up in a hospital bed with a tube in my nose having been given narcan. I mustve sobbed for hours. Disgust and shane don't even begin to cover it. Talked to myndad on the phone. He fucking cried. I made my father cry. Stilk partly wishing it had killed me, wondering why on earth it didnt? 7 years of this shit. Not sure how to get out but certain Ill soon be dead if I don't.

 

[nygiants1313]

Sry you went through this bro. I od'd once and woke up hours later in bed. The pain, dissapointment, failure that i feel i brought my dad (the guy who stuck by me no matter what, even to this day) is what eventually got me right. --on suboxone that is but he is happy and thats all that matters.

Your a cat with 9 lives and they are all used up. Others say do it for yourself not others. But i say you can start an addiction free life for someone else and continue it for yourself like i did.

Started it for my dads well being and happiness, continued it for myself and the family

I wish you the best.

 

[kvsouth69]

I did pretty much the same thing 10 yrs ago (well I stole a bunch of stuff from the anesthesia cabinet bc I workedin surgery). I think I just wanted to get high and go numb bc I was in so much emotional pain, but next thing I knew I was waking up in the ER too, screaming why did you let me live! It was so horrible and scary. My parents drove 4 hrs to see me, my entire family was there. They kept me in ICU and I agreed to go to rehab to avoid jail. Spent 2 wks in rehab and it was the best 2 wks of my life. Completely clean and airing out all the dirty laundry was the best most freeing feeling inthe world. Im glad I didn't die. If I had known rehab was like that (lots of tears, but lots of learning how to have clean fun and build real relationships) I would have gone much sooner by choice. Wish I could have stayed longer, but insurance onlky covered 2 wks. My advice? Go to rehab. They have a way of reaching you if that's what you really want.

 

[dognasher]

Ah. Yes, I have OD'd and ended up in the ER with my fiancee weeping by my side saying his goodbyes, and yet I still got fucked up like crazy for a few months before getting clean.

I don't have anything profound to say but I do think that even though you think your life doesn't mean anything and you would be better off dead, think of the heartbreak it would cause your father, who clearly loves you very much. I know he'd rather have you alive and addicted than gone for good. As long as you are alive there is a chance to pull it together.

Stay with us!