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i never compliment girls

D

drug100

Bluelighter
Joined
Jan 18, 2012
Messages
62
does that decrease my chance of actually getting a girlfriend because i will be seeing as a friend? basically when i talk to girls, i talk about anything and give them advice but never flirt or compliment them. i never compliment because i don't like doing that just like that.
 
I wouldn't say it will render you totally unacceptable as a mate but I should think most ladies like some sort of compliment or affirmation from their partners or potential partners. I definitely think it will make things a little harder.

I really like it when my girl compliments me, and I can see the joy in her face when she receives one too. It's nice to be reminded that someone appreciates a certain aspect; whether it's a really nicely cooked meal, a sexy dress that makes them look amazing, a gift they get you that they put effort in.

Even if it's something you don't particularly like doing; is it hard to say "you look great in that outfit" for the sake of making someone you care about smile?
 
There's nice casual compliments which they love. And then there's creepy compliments that put them off.

"Hey, where did you get your hair done, looks really nice" Goes well.

"I think you're looking really pretty, much prettier than other girls" just pisses them off, you creep!
 
You can also compliment them about something not physical too. "You got a 97% on your vector calculus exam? You're a bright girl!" or " I wish I was as good at assembly language as you are." or " That solo you just played was dope."
 
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Yeah, it's not because you don't ever give compliments that you're not going to find a girl, but it would help. The things people have suggested work well, like 'you look really nice today' or 'oh wow you can play [...] on guitar? That's impressive!'
That sort of thing. Please don't do as a guy who had a crush on me once did - he literally sent me a text saying 'your boobs make me fantasize'.
 
I also have this problem. I am great at conversation and all but when it comes to consciously making an effort to impress a woman, I hesitate within my own though process and sometimes what I say isn't quite how I meant it.

I am admittedly bisexual, and this could play a role in the dilemma.
 
The golden rule I learned from Tucker Max is: tell beautiful girls that they're smart, and smart girls that they're beautiful.
 
Complimenting and flirting is a way to show a girl that you like her. If you like a girl .. how do you expect her to know? When you want to be "more than friends" with a girl, you have to DO something that indicates that you want to be more than friends with them.
So yeah, not flirting and complimenting a girl who you're interested in will probably decrease your chances of having a girlfriend.
 
Effuzion said:
The golden rule I learned from Tucker Max is: tell beautiful girls that they're smart, and smart girls that they're beautiful.
Click to expand...

i hate to say it, but that pretty much works. i also love hearing compliments that aren't about "stereotypical" things. one guy told me he thought my hands were pretty, and i freaked out. blah blah talk about my boobs or my ass, but if i hear my whiskey voice is pretty, or my hands are nice, or that i have interesting handwriting, it's awesome.
 
^ even if he doesn't actually mean it?
Effuzion said:
The golden rule I learned from Tucker Max is: tell beautiful girls that they're smart, and smart girls that they're beautiful.
Click to expand...
what if you don't think they're smart? then just lie to them?

a compliment is meaningless if you just copy something 'nice' to say about somebody from the internet to try to get somebody to like you...

think of something you like about the person. tell them sincerely. what's so hard about that?

alasdair
 
alasdairm said:
^ even if he doesn't actually mean it?what if you don't think they're smart? then just lie to them?

a compliment is meaningless if you just copy something 'nice' to say about somebody from the internet to try to get somebody to like you...

think of something you like about the person. tell them sincerely. what's so hard about that?

alasdair
Click to expand...

It's not something that's meant literally. It's more like a guideline. It means that you should compliment women on something that's not obvious about them so that they can tell you're paying attention to them.
 
i fear that tucker max's audience take this kind of thing quite literally. :)

call me crazy but the best way to demonstrate to women that you're paying attention to them is, surely, to pay attention to them?

alasdair
 
Tucker Max is brilliant. The man got an economics degree from the University of Chicago in 3 years and got a full ride scholarship to Duke Law. You can't hate on that.

And yeah, listening is nice, but eventually you're gonna have to say something because, you know, conversations go two ways. Might as well say the most flattering thing you can.
 
alasdairm said:
then just lie to them?
Click to expand...
if you just want to fuck em, sure.

everyone is selfish, and most people are insecure with themselves. complimenting people is a great way to manipulate people because they will do what you want for the reward of feeling good about themselves.
 
How does Tucker Max's advice apply to a girl who is beautiful and smart?

But IMO, if you *genuinely* like/admire/respect a girl enough that you'd want her as your S/O, then compliments should be self evident and flow naturally. If you don't see self evident good things about her, why do you want her? If you do, just tell her those things.
 
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