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I need drugs

S

sh0ck3r

Bluelighter
Joined
Sep 19, 2001
Messages
808
When I come home from work, I'm fiendin for an eight-ball
I got crack on my mind, I'm hearin cocaine call
Telling me to beep the dealer to deliver me stuff
Keep it a secret from my wife, cause she thinks I don't use drugs
There I was, bleedin from my nose and damn
I couldn't breathe but I'm still thinkin about the next gram
It's Friday night, I'm not trying to leave my crib doped
I'll kill myself while the dealer's eating Japanese food
I ain't got no pride, I'm buyin this shit
I'm lying to myself telling the runner I'm trying to quit
It's all make believe, I pretend that I'm true
When you give me credit, I'm dodging you every chance that I get to
Even if it's good, I'll sniff it up in a minute
Beep you back complain that you put too much cut in it
If you fall for that - and bring me a new sack
I'll be making more crazy faces than Jim Carrey on crack
Cause yo I'm ripped, I owe you loot, plus I annoy you
I deserve to be murdered, but the coke is doing it for you
I got nerve, can you put them pills on my bill?
Yo I'll you we're friends and yo we don't even chill
I need drugs
I need drugs
Baking soda, cocaine, how sweet
I need to find me a crack pipe and I'm complete
I got these crack dealers chasing me through the cement jungle
Cuz they gave me shit to sell and yo I smoked the whole bundle
Yo I can't front - I got dope in my spleen
And I'm telling everyone at this N.A. meeting I'm thirty days clean
I won't die even with tuberculosis
I could go on forever mixing dope with my method dosage
You could find me at Brighton Beach or Coney Island
Or Rikers Island
My crack pipe is my violin
I play along to the police siren
My eyes squint looking for crack on the floor
picking up breadcrumbs and lint
I don't know who I am, ask me I couldn't say
I took a chance and tried to get clean and it lasted one day
Tried to go to rehab too but couldn't get admitted
And if there's money missing from your pocketbook you know who did it
I need drugs
I need drugs
As a young teen I started with marijuana
Then graduated to coke cuz I needed something stronger
Mescaline, dust, downers, injections sensation
I love to experience a patient's medication
I smoked the drugs off the back of my hands
All I need is a hit of it and I'll create a new dance
Protect yourself, baby cover yourself up
My body swings all over once my seizure erupts
Into a frenzy, on the phone I got thirty sack
But when we meet face-to-face, I got ten dollars less
Made up my mind, I'm quittin' I'm swearing in tears
I'm not gonna get high, I'll only drink bizz
Can't sit and wait for my dealer to come provide it
Gotta party to go to and I'm the only one invited
I search the entire house for the damn white mouse
And when I finally find it, I'll sniff the whole ounce
I need drugs
I need drugs
Dealer, listen to me
When I come home from work
Fiendin' for an eight-ball
Nose candy on my mind
I've come to realize, you need me
And if you want me to keep coppin'
Give me a free piece
It's my birthday
Yesterday
Anyway
I'm gonna go sniff this
I'll beep you in an hour
I hate you
~Necro
 
Addiction. a serenity of chaos in your own world. i lost so many friends to that shit, but i cant condemn you or dissyou, because i been in the same predicament on different shit. i had to move away and find another way, pray for a brighter day. let my favorite musicians tell me it'll be ok. i cant tell you you have to quit, you know what you gotta do in order to survive. you know when your at the end of your game, and youll know if you won or lost. damn i just hope you dont have kids, id hate to know you did the same thing my old homie did. i live in a town thrivin on the powder, and i promised God id never touch it. i see too much murder over it, i hear gunshots and screams every night because of it. i see 95 lb sick humans shakin in alley ways fienin for another hit. ambulances haul more dead bodies away because of it that anything else ive ever seen. lil children growin up in the middle of it. crackheads askin for spare change then tryin to hussle a dollar out of your 45 cents. i cant say shit to you to change your mind, ive tryed for years with many youngstas strugglin with it. id say what would you rather have, your wife or your fix, but i fear what youd say. and i know that it will never go away, even if you quit. because you in debt, but you stil payin their rent. and as soon as you stop their money flow from yo pocket, yo dead. its a vicious game i refuse to ever play, because i know its only worth pain and dismay. i wish the best for you, but thats just a wish. you the only one makin that one come true, and i aint gotta say shit, you know what you gotta do bro. Peace.
 
Dude check this out. First off, I know what it's like. Sorry to hear about your suffering, but there is a way out. You already know of one way, which is the NA way. I've been doing harm reduction for 2 years now which is no speed for 90 days followed by 7 days of indulgence. For me, this is balance. While I enjoy my dope during my 7 days, I still don't give up the rest of what life has to offer sober! No way, I want more than that and it sounds to me like you do too. If your're going to use, use responsibly. As you know, it aint cool to be ripping people off. What goes around, comes around. There is a way out! I don't care if it's the NA way (complete abstinence) my way (harm reduction) or whether you decide to accept Jesus, or whatever. You don't have to go on living the way you are. I only hope you decide to do something about it now. I know change is scary, but it's not so bad once you try it. I'll level with you. The first 90 days is rough. After that it's 10 times easier. What have you got to lose?
 
I just got to say I feel you... I had a three year relationship with a guy that sounded like you... all he lived for, was for the J's, the laced up dirty blunts and his fav. butter... I remember one night he called me up all wired up, saying that he had done an ounce and he needed more... he's voice was shakey... he had owed so much money, I was afraid when I wasn't with him, that one of dem dealers would've shot him or somthing. it got to the point I caouldn't take it no more, more than 90% of the time he was fucked off his mind. I was nor where near a prioity, and I was suffering, watching him suffer, and doing nothing but worth everyday. I tried helping, but you can't help the people that aren't willing to get help. I had to find this out the hard... the fucked up part, is that we had plans of doing shitt, moving out, he was even talking about marriage... the damn druggs fucked him up... he lost a good job cause of it, is parents kicked him for a while, he lost me... I caouldn't take it, everything about that addictive lifestlye, it was stronger than him. It's been 2-3 years since we parted our ways. I looked him up, let me tell you, he looks so bad, now he doesn't even care about hime self, what he wears holes and all, all hairy, really bad, he looks like he hasn't advanced in society since 4 years...
don't think I haven't had my share of druggs, I've done allot of shitt out there since I was 13-14, now I'm 21, but it ain't what it was, before. my life is more important, i don't want others to see me suffering or suffer cause they try to help but it ain't working. I just hope you do something... it easier to start now than tommorrow. it's a matter of focus... drive. the same drive you have to get your dope, is the same drive to not get it, it's a matter of finding the switch or learning to control it... no matter if it take a while... it's all in you, no one else can switch it...
I'm out, gotta catch a plane... good luck, and be safe hun.
 
it read like a rap, but whatever it was, the words were powerful and stinging....
I couldn't breathe but I'm still thinkin about the next gram...this right here is a clear definition of addiction, if i ever heard one... that's a damn fine line.
My crack pipe is my violin
I play along to the police siren
...a brilliant metaphor...
Gotta party to go to and I'm the only one invited
...and an awesome line to sum it all up.
this was incredible.
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