I miss me

[Nambo]

Hello BL

It's now been 3 and a bit months since I first tried 'MDMA' and have been fighting the most hellish battle since then. I have subsequently realised that I probably abused it but this was not known to me at the time. What a hellish parallel universe I have been living in. I didnt know such a constant living nightmare was possible or could be a reality. I pray that the previous person I was could be restored but my gut instinct says that person has died and what is left is a ghost of my former self who has to try to find some kind of new existence if I am going to have to live out the rest of my days on this earth. I pretend to be the person I was but this is just an exhausting act. God I miss me....

 

[jethro1000]

Hello nambo

Im been through this experience too and recovered. Like you i was dwelling on it 24/7. That time i was missing myself too much that keeps me fighting what i felt wrong. In order for you to recover is not fight it. You will be surprise that the reason why you are not recovering is because you are stressing/fighting on it, you will just lose when you fight the bad feelings. Try to accept the bad feelings and just try to live your life normally like you do before all this.
Its going to be a tough road but there is a light at the end of this. You will recover, i did so you can too. 4 months after i recovered.
As soon as i accepted that those bad feelings will be with me for awhile then recovery started.
Dont dwell on it just let it be with you for now. and try to be busy. Plan activities , go out. I promise you you will recover.

 

[eLW]

You will be ok, everyone i know is back to normal, including me ( and rolling again :D )

 

[angeleyes]

You will recover Nambo, stop comparing your current state to before your MDMA use, compare how much better you are since day 1 of recovery, 3 months since you must admit progress has been made if you have been trying.

Everything is going to be fine this I assure you, added stressing is just something that doesn't need to happen considering its all just a waiting game, trust me when I say this everyone has been through this doubt of never being better, I have but I am a lot better since day 1.


Keep your chin up its the weekend soon!!