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I made it

F

Fatjosh

Bluelighter
Joined
May 15, 2012
Messages
176
Location
california
Today is 11 days clean for me, it was rough but I made it. I am now dealing with the emotional side again. I feel like this must be how women feel when they are on their periode and are super emotional except I only feel happy or sad never mad. I feel like im on empathy overload. Music is soooooo fucking good right now, macklemore makes my hairs stand on end and riding my motorcycle is amazing. I still cant sleep without benzos or copious amounts of nyquil but other than that and a lottle rls im great. Does anyone elsget like this when fist coming off opiates, all I ever hear is how depressed people get but im just happy, thankfull, and most of all hopefull.
 
That's great Josh, I'm glad you're feeling good without opiates. You're going through a transition now so I'm thinking that's why you're feeling more emotional. Just be careful because you don't want to over use benzos or Nyquil for sleep.
 
Congratulations Josh=D I think everyone gets this. It can be a really positive thing to focus our thoughts in the moments. If we slip into yesterday we can get slammed with guilt, shame, resentment, anger, etc, etc, if we skip to tomorrow we can get hit with fear, anxiety, self doubt, hopelessness, etc, etc, best to just keep our thoughts in the moment as this is all we ever have anyway;)

Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment.
Buddha

PAWS LINKS
Why We Don’t Get Better Immediately: Post-acute Withdrawal Syndrome (PAWS)
Post Acute Withdrawal (PAW) Excerpted From “Staying Sober” By: Terence T. Gorski
Post-acute-withdrawal syndrome Wiki


Chemicals and supplements to recover from opiate addiction
Managing depressive thinking

it is a powerful thing to keep our thoughts possitive and here are some threads many of us use to help us do this.
Good things about being off drugs/getting sober
Share something POSITIVE from your day!
Today I Am Thankful For... Ver. 3: Earth, Wind and Fire!
Here is the mindfulness thread.

Your doing amazing things!!!!!
 
Thanks guys,

Calderone I am going to cut the benzos out in a day or two, although I feel like I will always need a sleep aid I always took unisom while I was sober, I have alway opiates for sleep never in the morning for energy like some people so it seems like I will always need somthin to help me sleep but I will soon switch back to unisom instead of nyquil which I have been takin just cause the dxm helps my withdrawl a little.

NSA-you are so right man. I am an extremely forgiving person, I only feel guilty for wasting time I have never done anything for my addiction that really shady so I have a clear conscience there. And i have been trying to most definitely been trying to live in the now. I got clean last time and never thought i would be here again, then again i never thought my lady would cheat on me and while i dont blame her for my relapse, i look at it like thos if you are driving along and drop your cigarette and crash your car picking it up the cigarette didnt make you crash your reaction to it did. So for now I am taking things a day at a time and working each day to become the person I know I really am.
 
Amazing!:)

Well done dude. As I'm sure you know the hard work starts here though, the good news is that it can be incredibly rewarding. Enjoy your new life.%)
 
Yay Josh congrats man! Really happy that you are doing well ;)
 
Thanks everyone.

I know the hard part starts now, I am having to deal with all of the things that I have been using pills to deal with, its been hitting me hard the past few days.Iam just trying to take it day by day one emotion at a time, today was kinda numb i have issues to work through andi know that so i have just been contemplating everything and anything that crosses my mind good or bad and just trying to accept the things i cannot change, taking neversick's advice and not dwelling on the past but just looking to make the most of today. Much love omen, herby, and maya. I truely feel that if the world could just have a fraction of the compassion shown on this board and those that frequent it, there would be so many people that would never have the emotional wounds that cause most addictions in the first place. I hope that some day I can write a comment on sombodies thread that lofts somone up the way that you all have for me. Its strange to feel soo much love for people you have never met. So to all of you I say thank you.
 
^Mine is a fiend for catnip. I guess that makes me the dealer?

Josh, you are right on with how you described handling the feelings. Learning to observe your own feelings without that instant thought reaction is probably one of the best things you can ever do for yourself. It's helped me a lot and it didn't come easy--still something I work on every day.
 
Lol I thought herby was a saint....now I feel so decieved, shes a nip dealer.

Omen- I was just giving myself a little credit as NSA said but when I said that im "the shit" its not because im clean its just my natural state of being and when im sober I just shine more cause I am a super functional addict. So I will not recant my claim that I am a boss....but so is your cat he could have been sober longer if herby wasnt sellin him the nip.
 
I was only joking with the tone it down dude! Be as proud as you like about your 8 days, just remember that pride comes before a fall.

Great to hear what will hopefully be the beginning of another success story on BL.
 
You get threads mixed up and that was a very playful post. I have been clean two weeks today and was not getting high for a week befor that, I dont understand how my last post could be seen as anything but a joke.
 
Congrats to you Josh! I have been battling the demons myself and plan on ending this three year long roller coaster from hell cold turkey starting tomorrow morning.. I know thats not the ideal way but its a choice I will try my absolute hardest to stand by. I took my last dose at 6pm this evening and I am not looking back. Please keep us updated, stories like yours really make me believe there is a light at the end of the tunnel. I have successfully made it through once before and was clean for a month until I moved in with someone that had opiates available at all times and was constantly taking them herself. Every recovering addict knows when the stuff is in your face relapse is inevitable... now I am in alot deeper than I was before though, enough I dont know if ill ever make it back.. I am hopeful now that ive found BL and have a place to turn when things get hard. Support is the biggest thing when trying to get clean yet no one around me knows whats going on. I plan on using BL as my support system. You all are a godsend.. its comforting to hear from others with the same problems. Good luck and god bless!
 
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