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I just want to fuck everyone...

P

Pyro

Bluelighter
Joined
Oct 24, 1999
Messages
1,135
Location
Bayarea California
I am down
Walking downhill again.
happy as ever
Quiet as ever
I don't know if I believe in anything.
I thought about it some
and I don't think I have faith
in much, or anyone
I suck the life right out of me
I hurt myself
I tear myself down
I kill myself
I am the chemicals in my blood
I am the fear, the rage, and the shit
I am nothing compared, or in contrast
eating dirt until I vomit up everything inside of me
I don't want to be happy
I don't strive for a sociable existance
I want to be fulfilled
I want to be alive
I've understood hell, I've understood heaven
I've walked until I couldn't
then I sat until I couldn't
then I laid down until I couldn't
then fell asleep
Inside my dreams are nightmares
Inside of you I dream
Inside of my dream is emptiness
Inside of you I am asleep
So it has been at least
That is, with all of them up until now
All the beautiful women of my life
And it just makes me fall asleep
I give up.
I throw you and them all away
I 'don't give a fuck'
so to speak
or I seem that way
people can see through me
I am an open book
I have turned my back so many times
You can see it in my face
and hear it in my voice
pain, but not my own
their pain
His perfect kingdom
Of suffering
vain hopes
False idealism
Liars and hate
his creation
The perfect god
the imperfect creation
how can it be
unless he wanted us this way
Then God damn it all.
I'm tired of angst
I'm tired of damning things
I'm tired of people who play games
I'm tired of manipulation
I'm tired of lies
I'm tired of blindness
I'm tired of masturbation
I want to love all the beautiful women that I come across.
I want to make love to them
mentally, physically
Of course I use restraint
I am in control of myself
but that does not change my desire
and I want them to fuck me
to take me apart and find my secrets
to feel inside of me, to feel me inside of them
---
Pyro
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post: I feel like I'm ... I just feel very down right now. I'm not sick, I am healthy. I think I feel unfulfilled, mostly. Perhaps some empty feelings (of course). I think I am having trouble again cause I don't live near any of my friends. I am truely alone where I am right now. I think that my friends are all growing apart from me... or I from them. I think one way or the other my life is becoming very solitary... and I love the social world.
I just want to fuck everyone...
Tim
[This message has been edited by Pyro (edited 27 December 2000).]
[This message has been edited by Pyro (edited 27 December 2000).]
 
Tim, please finally re-authorize me again for your ICQ. I've missed talking to you.
-t-
 
Pretty powerfull piece.
Dont look back, keep on going
smile.gif

------------------
Feel the noise... dont stop
 
wow...this is great.
also, i am trying to think of what i want to say here...as frustrating, and negative as the feelings expressed in this writing seem on the surface i think it si beautiful, the contact that you have with your emotions, and what they are. of course, i am not inside your body or your head...but i think it's beautiful, the un-apologetic, honest intensity....so refreshing...and again, beautiful
-thanks
------------------
"one good thing about music, when it hits you, you feel no pain"-marley
"if dreams were thunder, and lightning was desire, this old house would have burned down a long time ago"b.raitt
"there is a party in my mind, and i hope it never stops, there is a party up there allt he time, we are gonna party till we drop"d.byrne
***satori shalom***
 
Flux: Send me a notice again on icq. in the message tell me that it's you or else I will cancel it. hella idiots try to add me to their lists all day (spammers), so I am usually careful. I don't have an authoriztion request from you, so send one again.
=---------
Pyro
 
((((Hugs)))) Pyro.. sweetie cheer up... friendships come and go... love comes and goes... but REAL love will find you one day.. I'm at a loss for words.. -Aja-
------------------
-Meep-
 
tim - i'm sorry that you're feeling this way right now - you're an awesome person and fun to chill with. and i absolutely LOVE reading your work - its beautiful and straight from the heart. everyone has to go through the low times though to make the good times seem good at all... i hope things turn up for ya, and if you ever need to talk, i'm here for ya....
... i think there's only one thing left to do... (sorry jared but just this once, k?)...
/ME does tim
Melissa
------------------
animals are for petting!
"does anyone know where we are? because i think i dont have a clue"
"damn the man, save the empire!" - empire records
 
Every time I read something you write...I don't have any words to reply with...because you've said them all.
I feel that right now...will it ever go away and how...'unfulfilled' would pretty much describe it...
~kimmy.
 
i've read this now a couple of times...and each time it stirs something in me, but something that seems to escape words. so i guess i'll just let it stir.
 
Pyro. Although I do not know you, I know exactly what you are going through as I have gone through similar experiences several time.
Keep your head up man, here's wishing you the best.
 
all right i just read this again, and it hit me like it did the first time.
shit i'm at a loss for words again...
wow... thats about the only thing i can get out right now..
hugs
Mellabopper
------------------
animals are for petting!
"does anyone know where we are? because i think i dont have a clue"
"damn the man, save the empire!" - empire records
Corruption is key.
 
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