• BASIC DRUG
    DISCUSSION
    Welcome to Bluelight!
    Posting Rules Bluelight Rules
    Benzo Chart Opioids Chart
    Drug Terms Need Help??
    Drugs 101 Brain & Addiction
    Tired of your habit? Struggling to cope?
    Want to regain control or get sober?
    Visit our Recovery Support Forums
  • BDD Moderators: Keif’ Richards | negrogesic

I just flushed 2g of very good quality cocaine down the toilet

Status
Not open for further replies.
S

Stringer_Bell

Bluelighter
Joined
Jun 9, 2015
Messages
196
Background is that up until about 10 days ago I had only used coke a couple of times. But I got hold of some very good quality stuff and went on a week long 'binge' (8.5g over the week). During that week I had so much anxiety and feeling horrible but I kept on doing the coke. I was also using a LOT of Xanax and at times Oxy just to get over the cocaine anxiety. I suffered so many panic attacks, where I had gotten over those years ago. With the coke they came back in full force and then some. During that week my friends told me to flush what I had left. But I wouldn't. I thought to myself I'll just finish what I have, then if I score any more I will know I have a problem. Well somehow I scored 2g more, almost unconsciously, like I was watching somebody else do it.

My amazingly supportive girlfriend texted me this morning to tell me that she loved me. She is really anti-drugs and doesn't know about my recent binge. I thought what it would do to her if she knew about the week long binge, let alone that after that binge I had bought another 2g. I deliberated for an hour and then took the 2gs and flushed it down the toilet. I almost feel like crying right now, with relief I think.

I know what I did was a complete waste of money but I think it will save me much more in the long run.
 
What a waste of Money.

If you got addicted that quick, you're gonna be doing it again soon you fiend.
 
Stringer_Bell said:
Background is that up until about 10 days ago I had only used coke a couple of times. But I got hold of some very good quality stuff and went on a week long 'binge' (8.5g over the week). During that week I had so much anxiety and feeling horrible but I kept on doing the coke. I was also using a LOT of Xanax and at times Oxy just to get over the cocaine anxiety. I suffered so many panic attacks, where I had gotten over those years ago. With the coke they came back in full force and then some. During that week my friends told me to flush what I had left. But I wouldn't. I thought to myself I'll just finish what I have, then if I score any more I will know I have a problem. Well somehow I scored 2g more, almost unconsciously, like I was watching somebody else do it.

My amazingly supportive girlfriend texted me this morning to tell me that she loved me. She is really anti-drugs and doesn't know about my recent binge. I thought what it would do to her if she knew about the week long binge, let alone that after that binge I had bought another 2g. I deliberated for an hour and then took the 2gs and flushed it down the toilet. I almost feel like crying right now, with relief I think.

I know what I did was a complete waste of money but I think it will save me much more in the long run.
Click to expand...

sorry to say but it doesnt seem you handle the shit youve been taking and yeah it was a complete waste of money
taking concoctions like that isnt good for you
since you got a good woman use that as motivation to keep off the shit
 
since you got a good woman use that as motivation to keep off the shit
Click to expand...
This. If it makes you feel better don't consider what you did a waste of money, consider the coke a waste of health and sanity. Constantly freaking out doesn't sound like something worth paying for. Since there's no question here this thread isn't really apropriate for BDD, I've gotta close this. Good luck though :)
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Top