i went from a program strait to a SLE. to update the situation. I am doing good. I have my down times but over all im doing very good. I smoke less, drink less energy drinks, quit coffee, sleep better, do more exercise. I feel better. I take better care of my self. Moving ended up being a good thing. I mean its not perfect. I feel at times like im being used, that the guy wants me living here because I don't complain much and I feel a bit like maybe he feels like he can control me better then his other roommate who uses drugs. The tweaker who lives here gets on my nerves. He is a constant reminder of speed. Which I do miss. His friends all use drugs and being around them just keeps reminding me of drugs. Its frustrating. I mean he should of been out at the first of the month, he should be moving now looking for another place but he isn't. Yesterday he racked the lawn at 2am, then today he spent 5 hours doing a puzzle. He is crashed in his room right now. Its just... not fair he gets drugs and I don't. he pays less rent, he drinks my milk he uses my laundry deturgant. But I had the same issues at the last place. There were people there who stole from me, and took advantage.... I guess no where can be perfect. also I know he isn't using my shit out of spite he just tweaks and doesn't pay attention. I know if I ask he will replace what he uses and also I know that even if the guy who owns the place wants me here because I won't cause any problems at least I got my own space and we tend to agree on most things. So its a better deal for me. I feel better here. I am getting my options open. If by the end of the month the tweaker is still here im going to give my 30days and look for something else. In fact im working again now so I don't need to live here I can afford better, and in fact Im starting to think maybe I should live alone. I mean im ok here for now but I don't want to be around a drug addict. It is a bad bad situation for me and even though I admit I am thinking of using more and more I am staying strong. My doctor is so happy for me my parents are so happy for me and im not going to ruin that.
