IAmJacksUserName
Bluelighter
I'm a guy who has never asked a girl on a date and gotten anywhere from it. Of all the girls I've been with, it was either the case that she and I were very good friends and it evolved into something more over the course of a year or two, or we got to know each other through drunken fucks (which is what has been the case more recently, never goes well). Asking a girl I just met for her number then calling her back is something I've never tried, but now I want to.
Last night, I was covering a book launch for the newspaper I work for when a good-looking girl suddenly sat down next to me and introduced herself. The author of the book that was being launched had told her that I was a journalist, and it turned out she was covering the same event for the magazine she works for. We talked for about 10-15 minutes and seemed to hit it off– we talked about our career problems, looking for full-time work (we're both interns), and the general ups and downs of reporting in a foreign country. Oh, and she specifically told me that she had recently broken up with her boyfriend at her previous posting before leaving for her current gig.
We're both the same age with similar dilemmas career-wise, and, as a first impression, she struck me as someone I can get on with well. I couldn't stick around too long because I was on a short deadline, but I exchanged numbers with her before I left. It came naturally to me, which is odd, because I'm bad even at exchanging numbers with guys I meet.
I know I want to call her, and I don't want to wait too long. But I'm not sure how to play it. It's not as if we met at a club where it's obvious that any guy asking for your number is looking to get with you, we have the same job and I just happened to think she's cute and cool. So on the one hand, I don't want to completely conceal my interest and make bullshit excuses about meeting her for shoptalk, but on the other hand, I don't want to come across as too interested, horny, or just plain desperate (none of which I am– okay maybe a little horny, but not excessively so
).
I want to make her think that I'm a decent guy who wants to get to know her for all the right reasons, but who isn't just some friendly asexual brother type figure (which is what always went wrong for me in college, the last time I asked a girl on a date). For starters, where do you think I should ask her out to? The way I see it, I have three options: afternoon coffee, dinner or bar. Bar is out, because I don't want to messy things up with drunkenness at this stage. Coffee is casual enough, but might make my intentions too vague, while dinner is makes my intentions more clear, but might be a little intimidating.
Furthermore, I'm American and she is English. We're both expats in Asia with only a vague idea of how long we're going to be here for and where we're going to next. So whatever I try doing, it will be against a very chaotic backdrop.
Last night, I was covering a book launch for the newspaper I work for when a good-looking girl suddenly sat down next to me and introduced herself. The author of the book that was being launched had told her that I was a journalist, and it turned out she was covering the same event for the magazine she works for. We talked for about 10-15 minutes and seemed to hit it off– we talked about our career problems, looking for full-time work (we're both interns), and the general ups and downs of reporting in a foreign country. Oh, and she specifically told me that she had recently broken up with her boyfriend at her previous posting before leaving for her current gig.
We're both the same age with similar dilemmas career-wise, and, as a first impression, she struck me as someone I can get on with well. I couldn't stick around too long because I was on a short deadline, but I exchanged numbers with her before I left. It came naturally to me, which is odd, because I'm bad even at exchanging numbers with guys I meet.
I know I want to call her, and I don't want to wait too long. But I'm not sure how to play it. It's not as if we met at a club where it's obvious that any guy asking for your number is looking to get with you, we have the same job and I just happened to think she's cute and cool. So on the one hand, I don't want to completely conceal my interest and make bullshit excuses about meeting her for shoptalk, but on the other hand, I don't want to come across as too interested, horny, or just plain desperate (none of which I am– okay maybe a little horny, but not excessively so
). I want to make her think that I'm a decent guy who wants to get to know her for all the right reasons, but who isn't just some friendly asexual brother type figure (which is what always went wrong for me in college, the last time I asked a girl on a date). For starters, where do you think I should ask her out to? The way I see it, I have three options: afternoon coffee, dinner or bar. Bar is out, because I don't want to messy things up with drunkenness at this stage. Coffee is casual enough, but might make my intentions too vague, while dinner is makes my intentions more clear, but might be a little intimidating.
Furthermore, I'm American and she is English. We're both expats in Asia with only a vague idea of how long we're going to be here for and where we're going to next. So whatever I try doing, it will be against a very chaotic backdrop.
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