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I fucked it up aND I AM IN serious buprenorphine withdrawals

Pissed_and_messed

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i specced galenikan rivotril (clonazepam) and I don't know happened but apparently I took three-four day lines in single friday evening. I cinsumed 8 mg pill over 5 weeks, and mind you, it is not my first time, withdrawals get worse every time and I am also regular cannabis user, which slows down buprenorphine metabolisation and increases blood levels.

I have taken insane amounts of the rivotril and rowanberry wine I have brewed over the last few days, and also vaporized cannabis, and I am having very hard time, I HAVE ALREADY COUNTLESS SERIOUS MEDICAL CONDITIONS and I am constantly on verge of breaking up I have not been able to go into school this whole week I am feeling so fucking vulnerable but I just want to go through this because I don't think buprenorphine really is good medicine for me I don't know what I want from you but I know I need help! I am so deeply HORNY and in need of safety that I hug floor lamp.
:wg:
 
If anyone in the staff could take over my responsibilities until I can get myself rekt again I would appreciate it a lot.

I have lost my wallet but last I checked my bank account had normal amount of money but I can't check it again because I have lost the wire to load the telephone
 
but all the meds do not replace lack of opioid receptor signaling I could try cycling but I feel so fucking weak that I cannot make it

But I have fucking quit fucking benzos I can definitely do this, I am just seriously unstable and puyking everywhere, everywhere I go STINKS FUCKING HORRIBLE!
 
I feel for you dude. Withdrawals are awful.
Do you have any good friends that could check on you and make sure you’re doing okay? Maybe pick you up some comfort foods/drinks, or anything else you might need?
 
i fuvking try to pregorm liek iam duckibng stong but iam NOT I CAN BE READILY FUCKING EASILY HURTED I AM NOT FUCKING INDESTRUCTIBLE I AM FUVCKING HUMANM
 
I have FYCKJUNG ALWAYS TRied to play the fuvcking hard guy but it is n
ot fuvking realitry Ì am fucking viulnerable annd I hurt fdro EVERYTHING everrything
 
Oh shit. I feel you.. Tex withdrawals are nasty but tolerable. And the amount you used is quite small, wds should pass in 6 days. If i were you i would quit those rivotrils asap, those wds are much worse, and i know you know it..
 
If anyone in the staff could take over my responsibilities until I can get myself rekt again I would appreciate it a lot.

I have lost my wallet but last I checked my bank account had normal amount of money but I can't check it again because I have lost the wire to load the telephone
Hang in there buddy, don't worry about any mod stuff, just get your head right. Let me know if you need to talk.
 
wow yeah i don't have any really bad symptoms but generally just awful, I have took cannabis and mirtazapine and I am drinking beer. I am just having pains and I can't really control my bowels or bladder and I am having occasional chills and generally just...dysphoric. I am just deeply mortified, I have fucked up a lot of things lately. I don't even know where my wallet is but I hope no one is using my ID card for wrong reasons. At least I am still having normal amount of money on my bank account.

I made rowanberry wine before, it was fucking disaster. Brewing 25 liters of strong wine is always disaster. I simply should not do that, it always causes problems.

Now it is just patient struggle. I can maybe go to school tomorrow.
 
holy fucking shit, I have had worse bzd WDs but this was also excruciating, almost traumatizing, particularly combined with the intense mayhem caused by rowanberry wine, I have puked all over and I have cleaned up the mess a bit.

I started to cry when I got my hands on rivotril, I rode over 10 kms ignoring all the pain. I figured out I score gabapentin tomorrow and weed, because I have done the rivos also for a while and it will cause new problem but this was just what I had opportunity for. The gut rot, spastic bladder and inability to feel normal or tolerable or good in my skin or warm inside is no joke.

I really, really, really need to work on my issues, or this kind of incident WILL repeat. I can not keep sober when I have so much issues.

I still don't know where my wallet is, but I got new bank card just recently. I should probably call the cops tomorrow and ask how I should act about missing ID card. I have no credit so that is not problem and I think the old card does not work anymore as I activated the new bank card.

My neighbour told me my boots are outside around the corner. I don't know why. This is the kind of mayhem that happens every time I make wine.
 
I am doing much better, thank you. I am just having spastic pain and insomnia currently (they are anyways always and will bring them to the grave with me). I don't know how, but I've figured out some things. I have turned the whole seeking of security by idling passively-thing to seeking security by being active so I don't have time to think. That's progress.

I should go to school in 6 hours but damn Imma gonna again just stay up over the night. I just gave it up and started drinking coffee. But I have damn good reasons to go.

Only damage that I have not been able to satisfyingly reverse, has been the couch-it smells like rowanberry wine, I've tried vinegar and it helps but eventually rowanberry pushes through, until I repeat the process. Maybe it eventually gets lost.
 
may your couch be a reminder of not doing any more rowanberry wine experiments.

anyway, after looking rowanberry up I noticed it's a species I was told as a kin in Germany that it's poisonous for humans.
but seems like in Britain they make jelly out of it, and Schnapps in Austria.
 
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