Zarathustra1313
Greenlighter
- Joined
- Apr 1, 2011
- Messages
- 30
I have posted on here a few times over the years with questions about usage and also tried to inject my knowledge where I felt it could help. This is a great site and I'm sure many more will say the same.
Today is a huge day for me. I got out of a three day detox from a hospital. Never before have I done this and I wish I would have done so so much earlier.
Some background.
I tasted my first opiate when I was 15 after dislocating my shoulder during a high school football game. No trainers would touch my jacked up joint so off to the local ER I went. Immediately after being wheeled in I was shot up with morphine and instantly the almost unbearable pain/anxiety/duress (had been out for roughly 1.5h and had to drive 40minutes over bumpy ass streets to reach the ER), evaporated into thin air. This was almost 15yr ago and I can still remember telling the guy carting me to X-ray on the gurney "Man your job sucks! carting sick/hurt people around can't be much fun!!!" like it was yesterday. From that moment on I knew I was a fan of opiates.
Fast forward ~15y and here I was, using .5g-1g of heroin a day (insufflation) for about the past two years. This was preceeded by vicodin/OxyContin abuse for roughly two years prior to the heroin use.
I really don't want to write a book as I'm sure most don't want to read it but after countless episodes of withdrawal (from all of the above mentioned drugs plus non prescribed suboxone when I tried using those to quit), so many lies to those I love the most and cherish, last Friday things finally came together (with my spouse/work/myself) where I felt I could admit my full addiction and get proper help without loosing everything.
So I last used this past sat the 23, went to detox mon the 25th and got out today, the 29th. I wish I would have done this long ago, I mean the first time anyone I cared for learned of my addiction.
I sincerely hope my elation is not false as my final of 6 decreasing doses of methadone happened ~22h ago. Never have I taken methadone so I'm not familiar with it.
All I know is that when I checked in Monday at detox I said "I want off drugs and I don't want to take drugs to get off drugs after I leave here" (F suboxone, worst W/D's i have EVER experenced!).
So as of right now I feel high, like I did indulge, even though I truely have not. I feel free and am so optimistic about being drug free.
Words truely cannot describe!
Today is a huge day for me. I got out of a three day detox from a hospital. Never before have I done this and I wish I would have done so so much earlier.
Some background.
I tasted my first opiate when I was 15 after dislocating my shoulder during a high school football game. No trainers would touch my jacked up joint so off to the local ER I went. Immediately after being wheeled in I was shot up with morphine and instantly the almost unbearable pain/anxiety/duress (had been out for roughly 1.5h and had to drive 40minutes over bumpy ass streets to reach the ER), evaporated into thin air. This was almost 15yr ago and I can still remember telling the guy carting me to X-ray on the gurney "Man your job sucks! carting sick/hurt people around can't be much fun!!!" like it was yesterday. From that moment on I knew I was a fan of opiates.
Fast forward ~15y and here I was, using .5g-1g of heroin a day (insufflation) for about the past two years. This was preceeded by vicodin/OxyContin abuse for roughly two years prior to the heroin use.
I really don't want to write a book as I'm sure most don't want to read it but after countless episodes of withdrawal (from all of the above mentioned drugs plus non prescribed suboxone when I tried using those to quit), so many lies to those I love the most and cherish, last Friday things finally came together (with my spouse/work/myself) where I felt I could admit my full addiction and get proper help without loosing everything.
So I last used this past sat the 23, went to detox mon the 25th and got out today, the 29th. I wish I would have done this long ago, I mean the first time anyone I cared for learned of my addiction.
I sincerely hope my elation is not false as my final of 6 decreasing doses of methadone happened ~22h ago. Never have I taken methadone so I'm not familiar with it.
All I know is that when I checked in Monday at detox I said "I want off drugs and I don't want to take drugs to get off drugs after I leave here" (F suboxone, worst W/D's i have EVER experenced!).
So as of right now I feel high, like I did indulge, even though I truely have not. I feel free and am so optimistic about being drug free.
Words truely cannot describe!
