...at staying sober thing. I made it...I don't even think a day once I was back home. I went right out that night and got a dub of dope from my homie. I went into a local Taco Bell to kill the urge I've been having to get high in a public place. It was a fucking rush, I been loving the brown sugar dope compared to the black tar, plus the fact I've been clean so long made the high all that more perfect.
You know I realized this too, the funny thing with me and heroin too is it's always this "morning after" thing I have were I'm never sick till after I wake from a long nod (and am not physically dependent). When I got up the morning after doing my first shot of dope I was puking the whole drive to the dentist with my little cousin. But I have to admit that being recently free of heroin it makes the high all that much better. It was nice being able to go two days with no withdrawal pains. The only downfall, is that now I want to keep shooting because of how good it feels...not because the need anymore. Which at the rate I'm going won't be long before I become addicted again.
Of course I have only like $50 left because I spent $40 a the mall yesterday in an effort to keep me from buying drugs. However I can't say how effective that has been because even though now I'm more broke....I keep thinking about buying more junk. I should have just kept my money. Fuck man.
You know I realized this too, the funny thing with me and heroin too is it's always this "morning after" thing I have were I'm never sick till after I wake from a long nod (and am not physically dependent). When I got up the morning after doing my first shot of dope I was puking the whole drive to the dentist with my little cousin. But I have to admit that being recently free of heroin it makes the high all that much better. It was nice being able to go two days with no withdrawal pains. The only downfall, is that now I want to keep shooting because of how good it feels...not because the need anymore. Which at the rate I'm going won't be long before I become addicted again.
Of course I have only like $50 left because I spent $40 a the mall yesterday in an effort to keep me from buying drugs. However I can't say how effective that has been because even though now I'm more broke....I keep thinking about buying more junk. I should have just kept my money. Fuck man.