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i don't know if I'm too sensitive or my boyfriend is a jerk

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Ceramic_Cat

Bluelighter
Joined
Aug 26, 2011
Messages
246
Location
TWIN CITIES,MN.
so i have a new boyfriend. i made a previous thread about him. we don't have a good past, but i gave him a second chance. I'm a very sensitive girl. i can be the clingy needy type but i really try my hardest not to and i have ten doing well at not being so insecure around and with him. but i feel like the only time he's sweet is when were together in person which has mostly been on the weekends because he lives in the suburbs and can't come down during the week. he doesn't text me back 80 percent of the time. he makes fun of me sometimes and i can never tell if he's joking or not and if i complain about it he tells me "don't whine" , being as sensitive as i am it only makes me want to "whine" more. i really like spending time with him when he's being nice but lately i feel like i don't even have a boyfriend. he's not even hanging out with me on new years cause he has plans he already made. i don't know if making this thread was pointless or not since i can't even tell if I'm just being a baby or if i should break up with him. i do everything he asks and i just end up feeling used and completely unappreciated. can someone try to give me advice. id be really greatful. i really don't know if i need to get thicker skin or just break up with him before i get too attached :[
 
You need to communicate with him about how you are feeling, other wise these feelings will keep building. Good luck OP :)

By the way, sounds like you are being a bit over sensitive with the joking around part. He obviously isn't being malicious about it since he is your boyfriend.
 
thanks <3. but idk I'm afraid to talk to him about serious things especially things like subjects in this thread cause he will either get mad or not take it serious. idk, i just decided to not text or talk to him until he decides he wants to talk to me. i just feel really sad.
 
Sometimes, we're into someone else far more than they are into us. What are YOU getting out of this? He sounds like he's just blowing you off and

i do everything he asks and i just end up feeling used and completely unappreciated.
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Does he do anything for you? There are plenty of boys out there who will be good to you. Why waste your energy on someone who seems to treat you as a convenient thing to have sex with when he wants it? There's too many other great guys out there. He might even be a great guy, but he just doesn't sound like he's into you.
 
Ceramic_Cat said:
thanks <3. but idk I'm afraid to talk to him about serious things especially things like subjects in this thread cause he will either get mad or not take it serious. idk, i just decided to not text or talk to him until he decides he wants to talk to me. i just feel really sad.
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Ok well he isn't a mind reader, so I doubt he thinks anything is wrong. You'll feel a lot better if you talk to him, and if you think he won't take you seriously, make sure to tell him that this is a serious matter. If you think he'll get mad, choose your wording correctly. Don't put him down for not paying attention to you or anything, but say something along the lines of how you don't feel appreciate because a, b, and c. I'm a guy, and if my girlfriend said that to me, i would definitely listen. Good luck <3
 
idk :[ the only time he's really sweet and nice and caring is when he's on heroin. I'm going to just give it some time and if things get better then they get better but if not. i'll just break up with him even though i cannot stand being alone. thanks for the advice guys <3
 
Hmmm thats an entirely different story then now that drugs have come into play. Remember, there are plenty of fish in the sea, and if this one doesn't care for you, one will :)
 
Just a note: I rarely text anyone back, including my girlfriend, but I've already told her I'm lazy like that. It's just hassle using my phone, it's that shit. Same with facebook messaging, sometimes I just cant be arsed to reply. Not even in a rude way, I'm just lazy like that haha. Me and my missus banter all the time, taking the piss and that, but we still love eachother. Some people just express their love for eachother without being soppy all the time. You do definitely need to see affection though, otherwise it does just seem like you're hating on eachother, so kick him up the arse to get him into gear or chuck him. You sound like a nice bird, if only more of your sex were as affectionate eh !
 
Ceramic_Cat said:
being an addict myself. having issues with being alone. being attached to someone, crazy girl problems etc...
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maybe going clean would be a wise move? It would maybe help clear things out for you. Yeah I don't think there are to many people who don't have an issue with being alone and the rest is understandable.
 
Sounds like my ex (besides the heroin part). But he was never very nice, caring, etc. He'd make plans, never include me, and forget about the plans that we did have. And he did make fun of me a lot too, maybe he never really meant it, but it hurt my feelings! And he really should have considered that before making fun of me so much. He was my first boyfriend, I thought that was how relationships should be. But it's crazy. Why should you be with someone who doesn't treat you well? Why should you be with someone who won't listen? Why should you be with someone who makes fun of you?

It may seem tough, but there will be someone else out there for you, really! :)
 
Ceramic_Cat said:
so i have a new boyfriend. i made a previous thread about him. we don't have a good past, but i gave him a second chance. I'm a very sensitive girl. i can be the clingy needy type but i really try my hardest not to and i have ten doing well at not being so insecure around and with him. but i feel like the only time he's sweet is when were together in person which has mostly been on the weekends because he lives in the suburbs and can't come down during the week. he doesn't text me back 80 percent of the time. he makes fun of me sometimes and i can never tell if he's joking or not and if i complain about it he tells me "don't whine" , being as sensitive as i am it only makes me want to "whine" more. i really like spending time with him when he's being nice but lately i feel like i don't even have a boyfriend. he's not even hanging out with me on new years cause he has plans he already made. i don't know if making this thread was pointless or not since i can't even tell if I'm just being a baby or if i should break up with him. i do everything he asks and i just end up feeling used and completely unappreciated. can someone try to give me advice. id be really greatful. i really don't know if i need to get thicker skin or just break up with him before i get too attached :[
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Oh for real read what I highlighted. this dude doesn't like you. if he does, he's got something taking up his time and attention on the side. If a guy likes you, he's going to spend every 10 minutes trying to be with you....I'm old. I know these things. Good luck.

EDIT: Damn sure don't let this whatever speak for all of us guys....there's a guy waiting to worship you. And he will, it'll be the reason you'll stay with him.
 
it sounds easy to do but he's the only person who "likes" me. i drank last night and skyped with my ex for like 3 hours and it felt so nice and we still like each other and now i feel guilty. blegh i wish i didn't have feelings sometimes. but thanks again for advice everyone. hopefully things will work out :/
 
He's a jerk, that's been made quite clear by all the previous threads you've made about this guy. Of course you should break up with him, but I have a feeling you wont take that advice.
 
how long have u guys been together? the fact that you tell not to make fun of you, and he still does it is not a good sign.. if you don't like it, he shouldnt be doing it.
It also seems your more interested in him than he is in you. do you text him a lot? maybe that's why he doesn't reply. But if he liked you, he would reply no matter what. A lot of times this girl i know messages me a lot, but i still response even if its just a one word reply. So am still reading her reply, but my reply's are just one word.

.Unfortunately, I don't think he likes you. I think his either with you just for sex, or he couldn't find the type of girl he really wanted, so he just settle with you, just for the sake of having a gf.
 
being alone can be really hard, but i think being in a relationship that hurts you can be way, way worse.

the first relationship i was in was shitty, and i deluded myself into thinking that it was all i was worth. from what you've said, the guy sounds like an asshole. if i was with someone who pointed out that i acted like the guy you describe, i'd be really upset with myself.
you talk about being sensitive like it's a flaw! it's not - it can be a wonderful thing, but if you're trying to love someone who acts indifferent, it means you are going to hurt.
obviously we don't have the full story, but he sounds like a jerk.
having an addiction doesn't mean you're not capable of loving (in his case) or deserving of being loved (in your case).

i used to think love hurt like hell, until i met my current girlfriend. it is the first healthy relationship i've ever had, and it doesn't hurt. there is no jealousy or resentment. don't settle for second best!
 
I don't think this guy is right for you. - scratch that - I KNOW he's not.

If you're overly needy, then you need to find your autonomy - be happy with yourself, and realize your potential as a human being before you can get seriously romantically involved with someone - otherwise you are setting yourself up for an unhealthy dynamic in the relationship.
 
B1tO'RoughJack said:
I don't think this guy is right for you. - scratch that - I KNOW he's not.

If you're overly needy, then you need to find your autonomy - be happy with yourself, and realize your potential as a human being before you can get seriously romantically involved with someone - otherwise you are setting yourself up for an unhealthy dynamic in EVERY relationship.
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Fixed for you

As I've gotten older, one of the biggest turn offs is girls that can't deal with themselves, it's ridiculous. You don't need me every ten minuts for ANYTHING, if you do, you need to wear a helmet full time....even in bed.

It comes with youth or lack of ability to process the things around you. You will find yourself, and when you do, it'll be freeing as hell.....the truth of life: CARE ABOUT YOURSELF and the ones you want around you. FUCK what the rest of us say/do/eat/wear.
 
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