Bi KaNd*E* RaVeR
Bluelighter
I don’t feel so good.
And I’m pretty sure you don’t care… but I was thinking about you today.
Actually I’ve been thinking about u all month.
It was this time two years ago that everything changed… and our relationship came to its end.
I miss you.
And I know you don’t care.
You’ve moved on.
And you are probably happy now.
I can’t bring myself to believe that you found happiness outside of me…
When I know I cant find it with out you.
You’ve been gone now, two years.
You walked out my door and never turned back.
I think of the day you left, when I spoke to you and u said
“I’ll be back in 2 weeks”
and I’ll never understand why I even believed you.
I know I deserved it.
You didn’t need everything I put you though everyday
Throwing you out, and degrading your self-esteem
Ask me why it changed.
I don’t know!
I was selfish, and I was stupid.
I felt powerful, and I was still curious about life and other loves and myself.
Maybe it was all too early, and maybe we were too young.
But the fact that I love you never changed.
I love you to this day, and I miss you so deep down inside, I can’t begin to describe the pain I feel thinking about you.
I haven’t been able to find anyone to love me they way you loved me.
I can’t believe I let that feeling go.
I can’t believe I thought someone else would love me more
Or make me feel even half as good as I felt with you.
I changed my life for you
Why did I let that all go?
I think about the sacrifices you made for me
And everything u did for me I know I could never do.
And I hate myself for even thinking for one minute that u didn’t love me the way u should
And I really don’t know what to do now.
I never thought of myself as stupid
But I was.
I can’t say anything to you
But
I’m sorry
For everything.
I know u said it was a two way street, but I pushed u over the edge.
And I hate myself for it.
I can’t imagine the pain you must have felt
Because when the same happened to me a little less then a year ago, my situation wasn’t even as serious
I loved you for 3 years, and I’ve loved you from afar these past 2.
And I will love you, and all you have ever done for me forever
Jen
9-16-01
------------------
~*Jen
*As bad as I am, I'm proud of the fact, that I'm worse then I seem.*
[This message has been edited by Bi KaNd*E* RaVeR (edited 27 September 2001).]
And I’m pretty sure you don’t care… but I was thinking about you today.
Actually I’ve been thinking about u all month.
It was this time two years ago that everything changed… and our relationship came to its end.
I miss you.
And I know you don’t care.
You’ve moved on.
And you are probably happy now.
I can’t bring myself to believe that you found happiness outside of me…
When I know I cant find it with out you.
You’ve been gone now, two years.
You walked out my door and never turned back.
I think of the day you left, when I spoke to you and u said
“I’ll be back in 2 weeks”
and I’ll never understand why I even believed you.
I know I deserved it.
You didn’t need everything I put you though everyday
Throwing you out, and degrading your self-esteem
Ask me why it changed.
I don’t know!
I was selfish, and I was stupid.
I felt powerful, and I was still curious about life and other loves and myself.
Maybe it was all too early, and maybe we were too young.
But the fact that I love you never changed.
I love you to this day, and I miss you so deep down inside, I can’t begin to describe the pain I feel thinking about you.
I haven’t been able to find anyone to love me they way you loved me.
I can’t believe I let that feeling go.
I can’t believe I thought someone else would love me more
Or make me feel even half as good as I felt with you.
I changed my life for you
Why did I let that all go?
I think about the sacrifices you made for me
And everything u did for me I know I could never do.
And I hate myself for even thinking for one minute that u didn’t love me the way u should
And I really don’t know what to do now.
I never thought of myself as stupid
But I was.
I can’t say anything to you
But
I’m sorry
For everything.
I know u said it was a two way street, but I pushed u over the edge.
And I hate myself for it.
I can’t imagine the pain you must have felt
Because when the same happened to me a little less then a year ago, my situation wasn’t even as serious
I loved you for 3 years, and I’ve loved you from afar these past 2.
And I will love you, and all you have ever done for me forever
Jen
9-16-01
------------------
~*Jen
*As bad as I am, I'm proud of the fact, that I'm worse then I seem.*
[This message has been edited by Bi KaNd*E* RaVeR (edited 27 September 2001).]
