I can't even go to my damn appt.
He saw me, I hope he feels bad...
I hope the nurse feels bad when I'm fighting off the tears.
Does my mom feel bad for yelling at me while I cry, no. "Pull yourself together."
I've decided if I do it. It will be in a park so my family won't find me. I'll hang myself from a tree. I don't know what rope will work best or if I can even follow the directions to tie it...but I can try. I may not break my neck like many, and struggle as I strangle myself, clawing at the rope. Great ppl see that...real committed aren't ya.
At least this one I can't fuck up. I may sit in the freezing cold thinking about it sitting by a tree until a cop comes to tell me its closed, or a cop my come and cut me down. Save me and I'll be pissed.
I know people are upset when I talk like this. But I'm sorry. I have to get it out. I HAVE TO SAY IT! Or its bottled.
I should make sure I where a lot of blush, foundation and lipstick so I don't look so bad when they do the crime scene photos. IF they even bother. Although I don't know what to wear. Should I dress up pretty and make a statement>? lol Aww she was so pretty how sad. Yeah right.
I would have my suicide note, which I don't even know where to start writing on my person with my driver's license. However they could just run my plates on my car because I'm certainly not walking there. The note can direct them to my will. What little I have to give away. I need to change it though, Dec. 5 I wrote it and I need to change it. Mention a few more ppl, say I'm sorry for being a nut case, and make sure Noel is taken care of...
If a mod believes this has to be deleted. Do it, nothing matters anymore. If I get another "infraction" and you ban me..yeah thats really gonna suck..
"Gotta learn Leslie, no one wants to hear or be triggered by you selfish suicidal thoughts that you likely will never even do. Get help and quit putting you bullshit here and being an attention whore."
He saw me, I hope he feels bad...
I hope the nurse feels bad when I'm fighting off the tears.
Does my mom feel bad for yelling at me while I cry, no. "Pull yourself together."
I've decided if I do it. It will be in a park so my family won't find me. I'll hang myself from a tree. I don't know what rope will work best or if I can even follow the directions to tie it...but I can try. I may not break my neck like many, and struggle as I strangle myself, clawing at the rope. Great ppl see that...real committed aren't ya.
At least this one I can't fuck up. I may sit in the freezing cold thinking about it sitting by a tree until a cop comes to tell me its closed, or a cop my come and cut me down. Save me and I'll be pissed.
I know people are upset when I talk like this. But I'm sorry. I have to get it out. I HAVE TO SAY IT! Or its bottled.
I should make sure I where a lot of blush, foundation and lipstick so I don't look so bad when they do the crime scene photos. IF they even bother. Although I don't know what to wear. Should I dress up pretty and make a statement>? lol Aww she was so pretty how sad. Yeah right.
I would have my suicide note, which I don't even know where to start writing on my person with my driver's license. However they could just run my plates on my car because I'm certainly not walking there. The note can direct them to my will. What little I have to give away. I need to change it though, Dec. 5 I wrote it and I need to change it. Mention a few more ppl, say I'm sorry for being a nut case, and make sure Noel is taken care of...
If a mod believes this has to be deleted. Do it, nothing matters anymore. If I get another "infraction" and you ban me..yeah thats really gonna suck..
"Gotta learn Leslie, no one wants to hear or be triggered by you selfish suicidal thoughts that you likely will never even do. Get help and quit putting you bullshit here and being an attention whore."