• The Dark Side 💕 Welcome Guest 💕
    Posting Rules Bluelight Rules
    Notable Threads Urgent Hotlines
    Bereavement Mindfulness
    Suicide Support Anger Management
  • TDS Moderators: AlphaMethylPhenyl | paranoid android

I am quitting smoking, and need some support.

purple_cloud

purple_cloud

Bluelight Crew
Joined
Jul 1, 2009
Messages
3,596
Location
Queens/Long Island, NY
So after my mom died of lung cancer two and a half years ago, I knew I had to quit smoking. I've been in either a house or car of second-hand smoke all of my life, since my parents were "happy that I was used to it" and they didn't need to do things like open windows...I spent all of elementary school with no one wanting to sit near me on the bus because "I smelled like smoke" and although I pleaded with my parents to stop or at least not do it around my stuff, they have never obliged. To this day, as I am pushing 23 years old.

I started smoking at 14 because all my teachers were already 'telling me to quit' because I constantly reeked, from being in a small apartment with sealed windows and indoor smoking. So I figured, why the fuck not, everyone thinks I do it anyway. So this started in 9th grade. I tried to quit on my 22nd birthday this summer when going to Aruba, but that lasted all of 4 days. Now I'm trying again.


I decided to post in TDS because I need some support right now. This has been the only thing I can think about ALL DAY, seeing as my last cig was smoked last night. I couldn't focus in class, and I have an exam tomorrow, smoking is seriously the only thing I'm thinking about. All my friends my age who have quit did it with Wellbutrin/Chantix/the patch/etc...but after lots of internet research they say cold turkey is best. I am prescribed xanax so I figure I can use that when needed --- one addiction at a time, and my mom didn't die from benzo use, so anyone suggesting to not do this, I'm going to do it anyway as needed. Right now I don't care about my addictions other than cigs, I just don't want to die a horrible painful death. I've seen it, and may my mom, who was taken from me far too soon, because of many many years of smoking, rest in peace.

Anyway, this seems like a journal entry but it's not...I need support. I hid my smoking from most of the people IRL soo they all think I have already quit, it's been a pain in the ass to do it in private. But now unfortunately I don't have any IRL support at all whatsoever. I know some of you guys on here have kicked cigs...please assure me I'm not alone and this is going to feel okay?


I feel horrendous and have a headache and feel like I am coughing up everything known to mankind just about 20 hours after my last cig. I also feel that if I don't tell anyone, then I'll have no reason to stick to this...I keep rationalizing in my head why it's stupid and I should just give in and go to the gas station, but I know thats just addiction talking. Thanks TDS.
 
Last edited:
i put this list on my fridge and checked off each milestone as i reached it. i never put the pressure on myself to quit forever, only to make it to the next milestone, and i would reward myself when i did...

i also read the easy way to quit smoking by alan carr and it really helped. i had already quit when i read it, but it helped me to keep going.

Short and Long-Term Benefits (taken from the stop smoking center)

20 minutes after the last cigarette
Blood pressure drops to normal.
Pulse rate drops to normal.
Hand and foot temperature rises to normal.

8 hours after the last cigarette
Blood carbon monoxide levels drop to normal.
Blood oxygen level increases to normal.

1 day after the last cigarette:
Chances of heart attack and stroke start decreasing.

2 days after the last cigarette:
Sense of taste and smell begin to heighten.
Certain nerve endings begin to re-grow.
Nicotine by-products are removed from the body.

3 days after the last cigarette
Bronchial tubes start to relax, making breathing easier.
Lung capacity begins to improve.

2 to 12 weeks after the last cigarette
Walking and aerobic exercises become easier.

1 month after the last cigarette
Circulation improves.
You experience more energy.

1 to 3 months after the last cigarette
Lung function increases up to 30 percent.
Bronchial cilia begin to re-grow, there is an increased ability to clean lungs, chances of infection are reduced, and pollutants are cleared.
Overall body energy increases.

1 to 12 months after the last cigarette
Coughing, sinus congestion, fatigue and shortness of breath decrease.

2 to 4 after the last cigarette
The risk of developing Chronic Obstructive Pulmonary Disease reduces by 5%.

1 year after the last cigarette
The risk of developing Coronary Heart Disease reduces by 50%.

2 years after the last cigarette
The risk is reduced for recurrence of ulcers.
The ability for short-term healing is improved.
The risk of death from heart disease declines 24%.


just keep telling yourself that smoking is disgusting and you are happy to finally be a non smoker.


all the best!!:)
 
Thanks monchi...I feel physically like shit, and am definitely experiencing some withdrawal symptoms...I'm trying to tell myself that although I feel crappy, my mom felt a whole lot worse when she was in the hospital with lung cancer.
I realized one of my close friends was a heavy smoker and quit about 6 months ago (I totally forgot he even used to smoke). So I sent him a text message and he gave me some reassuring nice words.


After day 1 of this...I feel horrible for all you guys who have to get off things with bad physical withdrawals, seeing as I'm good with general illness but being a total baby about this knowing it's my own fault.
 
Cold turkey never worked for me. I'd recommend bupropion (Wellbutrin) if you can get a prescription for it. One of it's purposes is a smoking cessation aid. It should help to ease the cravings, and it'll make cigarettes taste like shit, so you won't want to smoke them anymore. Trust me, it'll make quitting the cancer sticks much easier.
 
Thanks Sweet P...I was worried about that just because I've been taking citalopram for about a year and it keeps my mood and anxiety (with the help of xanax) pretty stable. So I was hesitant about switching, or adding, or altering my currently effectively xanax + celexa combo in any way...I'm gonna see if I can do it cold turkey I think. Worst case scenario, I fail and have to try again. Taking xanax here and there throughout today and even a little pot seems to have helped (out of a bong).

Over the course of the day, I have found out I have at least some irl support, in addition to plenty over the interwebz.
 
^ You can safely combine Wellbutrin with citalopram. They often supplement each other well.
 
I hate bumping threads but really? Is this quitting thing so difficult that many TDS frequenters haven't quit? *cries* It's the night of day 3, and I have no idea how I've resisted cravings since some of them were insanely strong.
 
Just a few thoughts regarding my personal experiences which may help.

I spent years "trying to quit" but realised after many failures that that's just another way of saying "I'll try to see how long I can go before I fail". Learning that lesson was the hard part. Quitting was much easier. CHOOSE to quit and not just to TRY!

A positive aproach encourages self_confidence whereas focusing on the negative doesn't so although the harmful aspects of smoking served the purpose of persuading you to quit, I'd dissuade you from dwelling on them now that you're where you're at. Better to appreciate your improving lung function, general health, sense of smell, fresh smelling clothing et cetera.

I spent ages on a post that I accidentally deleted but the above was the basis of it. It gets easier as you go. I found the first two weeks the hardest. Know that you've quit. Replace a negative thought with a positive. Distract yourself by keeping busy. Any exercise is better than no exercise. Run up a few stairs every day. You'll soon notice an improvement and this will help your self-confidence.

Good luck! Believe!
 
Where did you hear that cold turkey is the best? My doctor told me that people who give up using the patch or gum are 50% more likely to stay off in the long term.

I can't really give you advice: when it comes to quitting, I like to quip that "stopping smoking is easy, I've done it hundreds of times!" ;-).

Just in case you need another statistic to motivate you to quit, I learned in class yesterday of a lung cancer case where opun biopsy there were something like 40,000 mutations in the primary tumor. It worked out to be an average of one mutation for every 15 cigarettes smoked. So every pack of cigarettes you smoke is really bringing you one step (one mutation) closer to cancer.

I really wish you the best of luck, I would imagine that being so surrounded by smoking for basically all your life it's going to be extra hard for you but I really hope you can do it. As I said before, I can't give you advice, but you definately have my support.
 
Purple Cloud -
You have my support... I am trying to quit smoking as well. I have tried many times. I have heard, and tried, going cold turkey. Has not worked. Right now the patch seems to be helping me cut down. Maybe you could try that? Good luck!
 
You have lasted 3 days. Thats great so far. The first few days are the hardest.
The other hard times are after meals, social situations where everyone is smoking, and with anything alcoholic. Sorry to say but you may never kick the cravings, you may still get them from time to time.

Going back for 'just one smoke' or 'just one puff' by the way is harmful. Just in case you were considering it ;)

Think of yourself as a non-smoker. Substitute smokes for water. Have a glass of water whenever you have a craving.
Believe me, this'll help muchly.. Because instead of having a smoke, which is bad for your body, you'll be having water, which is good for your body. Pretty soon you'll be drinking water out of habit, instead of lighting up.

Smoking keeps metabolism up - so water is the best substitute. DO NOT EAT INSTEAD OF SMOKING.. you will gain weight very quickly.

Keep a chart for every day/hour you go without lighting up. Tick the chart with every success.
Reward yourself for every week you go without cigarettes.
Think of the money you'll save and use a portion of it for your reward.

Eh, with all these tips I could almost quit smoking myself. Alas, I do not actually want to quit just yet, I admire you for taking that step and going this long without a smoke.
Good on you and I hope you keep it up.

We here at BL are here to help. xx
 
Purplecloud-
I quit after 15 years back in December.
If I can do it , you can do it!! ;)
Do you have any plan now? Are you going to try to use any quitting smoking aide, like nicorette? Or just go cold turkey? When I quit, I've posted this somewhere else, so if you've read it I apologize! :) But when I quit, I knew the day before that I was going to so I set myself up for a day in bed with my favorite tea, candles and a few books. It was really really hard the first day but I think it helped not having that wake up smoke......After day 4-5 it got easier.
The day you choose to quit, try to make it as stress free as possible and find whatever your motivation is and use it as your focus......When you need a cigarette that day, focus on something else.
I imagine some people would do much better with being super active that first day (or few)......
Just set your mind to it, and DO IT!
Its very empowering! ;)

Keep us updated onhow you're doing!
Oh, and Orbit Gum is awesome!
 
i've quit before but am currently a heavy smoker again.

What helped for me was different things for each time I quit.

* pushups every time I felt the uncontrollable urge to smoke. This left me winded and the craving passed (momentarily)
* nicotine patches
* a fuckin' asshole who I had no respect for and absolutely despised said to me 'you can't quit, man. You don't have it in you'. I used my hatred for him to help. I needed to prove that prick wrong!
* jogging in the morning

The first 3 or 4 days were always the hardest. I would become a real nasty prick (sometimes violent). Once I got through those days it became easier because I knew that if I had 'just one' all that misery and discomfort would have been for nothing and that I would have to start over again

I plan on quitting soon, cold turkey. I told myself that I need to quit prior to getting a job. Interviews have been happening so it looks like my time is fast approaching.

Good luck, man!
 
Thanks for the support guys, I'm on day 4 now but I'm really considering throwing in the towel. While this is only my second attempt to quit, it's my first *real* attempt to do so. I told the people in my department at school (I'm a grad student) hoping they'd understand I'd be irritable and be a little nicer to me. They have been more argumentive with me than ever and do nothing but insult me or fight with me...this was going on previously, but I would wander downstairs and have a cig when it got to me and it helped. Also, knowing I'm trying to quit I think they are just making it worse, since they are the sort who see cigs the way they see pot or any other "drug", that whoever is using such is inherently a bad human being, because they were raised in little bubbles. Instead I'm lashing out, I've said some nasty things about professors whom I've never liked that those stupid dick sucking grad students most likely ran back to them and said, and with three weeks left in the semester I cannot focus at all. I already failed a test because of this, and I can't focus or figure out any of the remaining homework assignments or papers I have. My stress level is through the roof without quitting on top of it, and I think I picked a really shitty time to try.

I know that I "can't just have one" but at this point, after 4 days, I'm considering having a cig and calling the NYS quitline, since they send out the gum for free. I think if I wasn't at the most stressful point in my semester I would stand a better chance...but I can't function, I told my friend today that I confide in that I just wanna sit here with razor blade and cut my leg until the bone is exposed...the THOUGHT of self mutilation hasn't even occurred in at LEAST 7 years, even through the death of my mom it didn't arise. I've been using xanax and pot, it's not helping. I've been on the verge of tears, and so far today I have felt the worst.


Everyone says they miss certain cigs of the day and not others. I think the ONLY one I miss is the one for on the way home, when I'm totally done with my day. I had purposely left out other ones when I was cutting down before quitting, and that is definitely the one I miss most.

Right now I'm very torn between throwing away 4 days of hard work, bumming a cig off a stranger so I really can have just one (don't have money for cigs at the moment and all of my actual friends have quit), or just going to the store, buying a pack, and saying fuck this, my mental health might actually be more important than my physical health.
 
Dude, tell yourself you'll smoke tomorrow. 4 days is A LOT of misery to experience for nothing. You are almost over the hump, man. Wait until tomorrow and see how you feel. You are so damn close to beating this!!!!
 
You smoke pot? Maybe you could put a TINY bit of tobacco in with your pot? Might be bad advice, but it'll give you a *slight* hit of nicotine.

I know its hard man. Is there any way you can remove yourself to a change of scenery for a week or two?

I did this when I quit pot. I moved to the other side of the country and have had one cone in 6 months, as opposed to smoking all day every day. Worked for me.

Dont throw in the towel yet man, please, youve worked so hard.
 
Okay guys, I decided to take a nap to sleep it off because if I was awake I was going to give in. It seems to have helped. I don't like tobacco mixed in with my weed, ruins the taste and makes the hits harsh IMO, but I'm from the US and we don't typically do that anyway. I can't change my scenery unfortunately --- I did that when I went to Aruba and quit there, but I ended up getting drunk towards the end of the week, bumming one off someone, and then immediately going back to it...I had cheated though and just lied about it, so I didn't even really last 3 days that time.


Thanks for posting on here guys even if its just that you believe in me...I've been using BL instead of smoking, because I tend to get lost in reading and thought on here quite a bit, esp when I'm stoned, and it actually offers quite a good distraction from a cig.
 
Hey, congrats on deciding to quit, that's a big first step taken right there :) Post all you like if it helps, I might even jump on the wagon with you as I know I need t (and want to) quit!!

t's worth it, it's just the fist few buggery weeks!!! you can do it <3

chelle
 
You definitely should jump on! I've been checking this and other pages about quitting stories and stuff in general the last few days since I haven't done much but sleep, somehow I have no appetite? And the internet has been a pretty damn good distraction honestly.
 
First off purple_cloud, even though I am not a cigarette smoker many members of my family are so I have seen how hard it is to quite and I admire any smoker making a real effort to quit as it is one the hardest things to accomplish. Hang in there it's hard but, do able and your health will benefit in the long and short term. one suggestion I hadn't seen mentioned that may help is the electronic cigarettes, gives the look, feel, and nicotine without the smoke (you inhale water vapor) and you can even "smoke" anywhere with them. Good you found a distraction as alot of folks tell me that is a MAJOR hurdle is to occupy that time you'd usually use to smoke. It's a tough battle BUT, it sounds like your really pushing through it, I'll be rootin for ya over here. Best of luck and hope you succeed purple_cloud. :D
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top