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TDS I am an exhibitionist

Artificial Emotion

Artificial Emotion

Bluelighter
Joined
Jan 19, 2009
Messages
5,314
Location
UK (Kent)
I have a sexual problem where I can't help but expose myself to strangers in public. At the moment it's the only thing that turns me on but I want to change. I am terrified about getting caught and put in prison as this would probably be the most embarassing thing that's happened to me in my life.

Does anyone have any advice about how I can stop this behaviour? I feel it's an addiction - no different to alcoholism or drug addiction.
 
I don't think so, mostly because you know it is a problem and you need to stop. Even if it is mostly to avoid penalties from getting caught, that is really what stops a whole hell of a lot of people from doing a whole hell of a lot of things. Much worse things than exposing themselves.

But you definitely do need to get a male psychologist and start taking steps to get help quickly. A lot of times sexual behavior "ramps up" as current levels of stimulation become unsatisfying and then you could get into some very risky behavior. Oddly enough, most Western cultures view "flashers" as being pervy and illegal, but not inherently dangerous. In some areas I don't believe it will even get you on a sex offender list but that is changing. But if the behavior ramps up, you will quickly be risking being on the list if you are caught and that will have a severe impact on the rest of your life. Get help now and completely envelope yourself in the help. Sexual behavior can be tough to change but it is possible.
 
Artificial Emotion said:
Do you think what I do makes me a bad person?
Click to expand...

I think what you do can have a devastating effect on women and children. I say that from experience. However, and this is really, really important for you to absorb:it does not make you a bad person. You have a compulsion to do something that you know is wrong and so far you are not able to control it. You need to take every step you can, right now, to get to the roots of this and learn ways to control it before you hurt someone and/or go to prison and have to register as a sex offender for life. Don't let the shame and stigma stop you from getting the help you need. The stakes in this are so high. Please find a therapist or better yet a psychiatrist, that actually works with people with compulsions like this. Wherever this comes from it is probably rooted in your own childhood--I know you would never choose this if you felt a choice.

It took a lot of courage for you to write this I know. You should feel proud of that courage and keep feeding this part of yourself that wants to be in control of your thoughts and your actions. But also know that it will be next to impossible to do this on your own--you definitely need the expertise of a trained person--not just a talk therapist.
 
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