What's up bluelight 
My name is Laurens, im a pretty normal 17 year-old but I have some questions... A few months ago I felt like I should get a girlfriend. I saw everyone around me with their girlfriends and I felt like I wanted that too, you know. I thought to myself: 'Partying every weekend is nice but wouldn't a girl to love be nice either? I kinda miss this'.
So I kinda went in the open and found a girl I like. We went for something to eat and drink a few times and I really like her. In the weekend I even thought for a moment I was falling in love with her. Now some people know we're kind of hooking up (I don't really care and neither does she) and I feel like i'm forcing myself into starting a relationship with her. Don't get me wrong, I really like her.. She's smart, very cute, funny, spontanious, just everything i've been looking for. It just seems as if the second that things MIGHT get serious, I panic and don't want to anymore. Making out with girls at parties: No problem. Could this be some kind of defence mechanism or something? Oh btw, from april to septembre I was hooking up with this other girl (I was really really really in love with her)and she ended up pretty much dropping me like a fucking brick. Might this have to do with anything?
I don't know what to do now cause I don't want to hurt her but I don't want a shitty relationship either...
Thanks for reading

My name is Laurens, im a pretty normal 17 year-old but I have some questions... A few months ago I felt like I should get a girlfriend. I saw everyone around me with their girlfriends and I felt like I wanted that too, you know. I thought to myself: 'Partying every weekend is nice but wouldn't a girl to love be nice either? I kinda miss this'.
So I kinda went in the open and found a girl I like. We went for something to eat and drink a few times and I really like her. In the weekend I even thought for a moment I was falling in love with her. Now some people know we're kind of hooking up (I don't really care and neither does she) and I feel like i'm forcing myself into starting a relationship with her. Don't get me wrong, I really like her.. She's smart, very cute, funny, spontanious, just everything i've been looking for. It just seems as if the second that things MIGHT get serious, I panic and don't want to anymore. Making out with girls at parties: No problem. Could this be some kind of defence mechanism or something? Oh btw, from april to septembre I was hooking up with this other girl (I was really really really in love with her)and she ended up pretty much dropping me like a fucking brick. Might this have to do with anything?
I don't know what to do now cause I don't want to hurt her but I don't want a shitty relationship either...

Thanks for reading