• H&R Moderators: streaM Freak

How to love being sober?? Like really love it?

Thanks for all the posts everyone, im glad the conversation is helping others also.

Im not in a good place today so don't have too much too add but I just wanted to acknowledge all the well thought out posts and say thank you for taking the time.

Oneonlyblacksheep, how long have you been clean for? I don't WANT to use drugs, I know where that takes me and it's not good, I have too much to lose, I just don't want to feel like 'this.'
 
I guess so but that's like the total opposite extreme, I never got to that point. Worst was opiates 3 times / week.

Being able to enjoy alcohol would be nice, this is the hardest part to get used to... from having 1 drink nearby every day to nothing. I'm way too young to have this happen, all my coworkers get to partake and I'm stuck like this for who knows how long :(

I never had a problem with drinking to excess, maybe 4 drinks if it was a weekend.
 
Difference in degree and not kind is a lot easier than jumping from one extreme to the other, like the difference between jumping off a cliff and taking the stairs. The key is to find healthier, easier ways to take yourself down the mountain once you have learned to climb the mountain of drug use.
 
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There'll be times you'll love being sober and times you hate it.

It's called life.

Isn't it better than being desperately addicted though?

;)

Im not sure if this was directed at me or the poster before me or simco or someone else, this thread is jumping all over the place.

That's exactly why im asking, I don't want to just be clean and sober; I want to be happy and addiction free. I WAS clean and sober for 14 YEARS not days or weeks, 14 years. But I've never lived without an addictuon to date since I was 7 years old. Im now 38 and want to achieve this but it's been my whole life, it's not something I've experienced, theres no bench mark so it's a very scary unknown.

Of course being clean is better than being addicted. I know it's life, but I've never done life without a major buffer and i so desperately want to but am so terrified at the same time.
 
Agreed, quality of life is what is most important. Being sober, clean, abstinent, whatever, it all plays a big role in becoming healthier again, but how you define it is not up to me or anyone but you and those you care about, love and respect. If you shit where you eat, so to speak, well, you know what I am saying.
 
Difference in degree and not kind is a lot easier than jumping from one extreme to the other, like the difference between jumping off a cliff and taking the stairs. The key is to find healthy, easy ways to take yourself down the mountain once you have learned to climb the mountain of drug use.

:)

Now I have Janes Addiction 'Mountain Song' in my head. Great tune ?
 
Yes, quality of life is a good term for it. And it's such an NA cliche but I want to know what it's like to live life on life's terms. I hate that that came from NA (nothing against it, just not for me sadly as this point being on the subs) but it does sum up how I feel. My brain just doesn't understand how to live without an addiction.
 
If you just keep trying you will figure it out sooner than you think. The more effort and the smarter you go about trying to get healthier, the sooner you will find lasting success. Be well my friend <3
 
Thank you. Im not giving up. Thus far I've only ever gotten or stayed clean for other people, ie. My children. I know true recovery will come when I decide im worth it too :))
 
Life on life terms is in a nutshell acceptance.

The first thing that needs to be accepted is that life is not always pretty, kind, or rewarding. Quite a lot of the time it really sucks and you are forced to make decisions you do not want to. It is the bad moments that make the good moments so much better.

The second thing that needs to be accepted is that if you obsess over finding happiness it will slip through your fingers like a greased up snake. The harder you try to hold onto it, the faster it slips away. When something good happens live in that moment and allow it to give you joy. When something bad happens just realize you are strengthening yourself.

The last thing that needs to be accepted is that happiness is a choice. If you go through life focusing on the negative you will never be happy. It is your choice to actively seek out things that make you happy. For example: It is my mom's birthday today. I decided to cut her a bunch of flowers in her favorite color (orange). It brings me joy to bring her joy. I could have easily done nothing and just been blase about today, but I chose to bring joy and happiness to another, which makes me feel joy and happiness.
 
And that is one (of the many reason I have so much love and respect for you)!

Life certainly is a mish mash of its 10,000 joys and 10,000 sorrows, as they say ;)
 
Difference in degree and not kind is a lot easier than jumping from one extreme to the other, like the difference between jumping off a cliff and taking the stairs. The key is to find healthier, easier ways to take yourself down the mountain once you have learned to climb the mountain of drug use.

Thanks for this

I'm trying not to take the stairs down but some days are tough. So far it's been all cliff
 
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