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Heroin How to deal with cravings?

EveryStar

Bluelighter
Joined
May 23, 2007
Messages
922
I got popped on June 20th for possession of less than 1 gram of methamphetamine.

Spent a night in county, saw lawyer the next day, who recommended detox + long-term rehab. I spent 12-14 days at a hospital detoxing from methadone (100mg for 4 months, kicked cold-turkey) and benzos (tapered at the same time, 2mg clonazepam and 30mg temazepam daily for about a year). I had been trying to kick dope since December 2009, after using for almost 2 years. I was shooting Suboxone bought off the street and taking methadone...or shooting smack when I couldn't get either of the former and I needed to fix now.

Last time I did dope was on February 23rd, 2010, the same morning I hit up the clinic. So I haven't done heroin in 5 and a half months, and detox was, needless to say, motherfucking hell, I would have walked out (if it wasn't for the law), and used the 76 dollars in my wallet to get a bunch of dope (while detoxing the only "good" thing I could think about was "Fuck yeah, after this shit my tolerance will be close to nil I'ma go and nod off 5 bucks of junk!"). The only thing that put me to sleep the first night was neither the 50mg of chlordiazepoxide nor the 30mg of temazepam, but rather the nurse taking blood from my arm. I guess seeing a needle in one of my veins must have released enough endorphins to calm down the WDs (the restlessness and accompanied constant kicking being the worst...and unfortunately the first thing to pop up every time I was in withdrawals before) and let me sleep. I asked first thing in the morning to be put on Neurontin and clonidine the next day to calm down the constant kicking, yawning, tearing and whatnot.

Anyways, nearly 2 weeks of hell later, I go to rehab. Unfortunately I get called back to Harris County for court on July 21st, and find out I have to stay in town till my next hearing on September 2nd, while I'm on pre-trial diversion, and have to show up to court for a piss test at any time within the hour of getting called. Positive results or refusal to urinate ("I can't pee" is considered refusal, no matter how legitimate your statement may be) = jail.

Now, to my question: I've been clean 40+ days, and even though I haven't shot up in over 5 months (crack being my drug of choice while on methadone...needed a rush every day, and I guess crack filled that void...yet I barely have any cravings for crack, while the heroin cravings and daytime fantasies of doing "one last hit" and nodding, etc. are always there.), yet my thoughts are seemingly solely focused on how to do some and not getting caught, thinking about whether I should make the call or not, etc. The only thing that's keeping me from not doing it is the thought that "Hey, why risk prison for one fucking high, when I could just wait until September 2nd, see what the judge says, and then get loaded?" That thought of a potential high in the near-future being my only motivator (oh yeah, and getting thrown in the slammer for a couple years if caught), I know deep down I don't really want to get sober, but I'm just giving it a shot to see if it's all it's hyped up to be (lol). I mean fuck I'm an addict I want some goddamn instant gratification, some feel-good time with none of the consequences, instead of all that waiting and hard work and long-term happiness stuff I hear of.

So yeah, how the fuck do you deal with the cravings? Some dude at this halfway-house I'm considering going to, he got busted with 3 keys of dope and says after like 2 months clean you stop thinking about it. I don't buy that shit, I know plenty (okay, a few, but still) of people who spent months or even years clean and said the cravings NEVER go away. Fuck.
 
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time is the only thing that takes them away. you have to replace the act of getting high with something else that DOES FEEL GOOD. i would suggest sex/jerking off, eating, taking a shower, taking a nap, seeing a good movie...

its not enough to just do something else, you need to do something that does feel good and generally gives you a little escape. im on suboxone and its been months since i used H, but i find myself wanting a proper rush. coke, meth, H, whatever, i think about it when im bored.

pot and booze arent enough to really satiate the want for a proper fucking IV rush of something really euphoric so i just leave em out altogether. i mean if i do get the desire to smoke pot its really just an attempt to trick myself into thinking the high will replicate dope. im always dissapointed with thc and never really enjoy it.

booze i drink maybe once a week and never get drunk. its taken me a lot of time to rediscover my taste for alcohol. it feels nice to have a drink or two at the end of a long day now, for a while i was actually repulsed by it. so time does change things, my friend.

i remember when i was kicking dope i jerked off every single day. it helped a lot with the paws. that and hot showers are the only thing that help for paws besides taking a benzo i found. for cravings sex usually works for me. im very lucky to have a smoking hot girlfriend that loves to suck dick and get fucked. love that woman.
 
excerise is good strecthing being around people that are ethier funny interesting or both or if u must use drugs cuz its too unbearable take codiene cwe it. hydrocodone cuz its also weaker shrooms help or acid i apologize if my advice makes it worst.
 
So yeah, how the fuck do you deal with the cravings? Some dude at this halfway-house I'm considering going to, he got busted with 3 keys of dope and says after like 2 months clean you stop thinking about it. I don't buy that shit, I know plenty (okay, a few, but still) of people who spent months or even years clean and said the cravings NEVER go away. Fuck.
Everyone's different, but I'd say on average it lasts more than 2 months. As time goes by, your cravings will diminish in strength and frequency, but you'll still get them every once in a while. The worst ones, at least imo, are the dreams.

Find something to occupy your time and set some long term goals. Good luck.
 
I know the cravings are awful, unfortunately I doubt theres much to do about them. Theres other drugs or med's that people go to when in WD, but Im not sure if they would do much for the cravings, I really doubt anything outside of a narcotic will help cravings. But in your situation there isnt a lot you can do but find other ways to pass the time. I know its tough though. Finding a hobbie or recreation that really interests you, or something you can set goals for. The hardest thing going against you is the fact you're not really into getting sober, which I gotta say I dont really blame you, the idea of it doesnt sound good to me either. In some shit situations though you almost dont have a choice.
 
Time man, time. Just keep yourself occupied. Take up a new hobby or something. Exercise really helped me though and eating healthy is good too. It takes a while for cravings to go away but they are MUCH easier to deal with after some time has passed. The frequency/intensity of cravings will decrease in time.
 
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