How to be hungry

[(Wordy)]

Throw your phone in the river.

Shake hands with what you've been killing.

Unplug everything.

Sleep on the road and wake up everywhere.

Return every thing you love to where it came from.

Sell the past and future and give the proceeds to the present.

When lies take office, decorate the streets with truth.

Respect fear as a well-organised adversary.

Try on someone else's pain, then steal it.

And if you really want to reach your destination, walk.


(c) Stu Hatton 2006

 

[wesmdow]

we all work as hard as we can not to 'shoot ourselves in the foot.'

ive seen people do essentially what youve written and it strikes a chord with me, good work.

 

[EntrenchdMentalist]

Sell the past and future and give the proceeds to the present.

When lies take office, decorate the streets with truth.

Respect fear as a well-organised adversary.

Fuck yeah! %)

 

[raverchik]

I really really liked this.

 

[kazza_baby]

I can't pinpoint exactly what, but there's something I adore about this piece.

Perhaps the way the words and lines are segmented, yet string together so well.

Simple yet effective.
Love it.

 

[up all night]

OMG! Throw my phone away?! Heathen.

(Totally agree - but then again, sometimes I feel like a hippy who doesn't practice what they preach.)

 

[(Wordy)]

Thanks for the kind words.

I submitted this to a local experimental poetry mag, and they liked it, but wanted me to make some changes. Funnily enough, they weren't too sure about a couple of the lines Entrenched Mentalist quoted, saying they were too philosophical in contrast to most of the others. But hey, I can't help being philosophical! (lol) There were a couple of other minor things too. Not sure I'm prepared to go along with all of their edits, although granted, some could improve the poem. They're already going to publish another piece, so I might just leave it at that... Unsure really.

 

[zorb]

Try on someone else's pain, then steal it.

rocks

 

[(Wordy)]

How to be hungry (redux)

Throw your phone in the river.

Shake hands with what you've been killing.

Unplug everything.

Sleep on the road and wake up everywhere.

Return every thing you love to its birthplace.

Think in the present tense.

When lies take office, decorate the streets with truth.

Respect fear as an accomplished adversary.

Try on someone else's pain, and steal it.

See destinations, and walk to them.


(c) Stu Hatton 2006

 

[Raz]

^^I dunno, I think I prefer the original...I do prefer the line Respect fear as an accomplished adversary but of the other changes I liked them better the first time.

Different strokes I guess..

 

[(Wordy)]

Hmmm, what can I say? Trying to improve a poem when drunk doesn't always work out!

 

[(Wordy)]

Ok, after much musing and meandering, I've made some changes. I think I'm finally happy! Or at least, happy enough to resubmit this to the magazine I mentioned earlier in the thread.

http://wordyness.blogspot.com/2006/07/how-to-be-hungry-2006.html

 

[EntrenchdMentalist]

I'm glad this line made it through, it speaks volumes to me: "When lies take office, decorate the streets with truth."

 

[RareForm]

idealistic and thoroughly admirable. what we're all thinking; but you're the one who's said it. major kudos my friend.

 

[>Marquis<]

^^I dunno, I think I prefer the original...I do prefer the line Respect fear as an accomplished adversary but of the other changes I liked them better the first time.

Different strokes I guess..

Yeah I'm with you on that. I like it best that way. I should say I LOVE it best that way

 

[dexingpotsmoker]

It's a pretty cool piece. Now I hope you don't take this the wrong way but I enjoy it as words that somebody would say, but not poetry. I guess I just feel poetry should have rhythm and rhyme, BUT I know this doesn't always have to be the case. That being said, its pretty cool.