How To Approach Girlfrend for sex

[MynameisnotDeja]

But then other times I think f*ck, I like sex, it's not hurting anyone, in terms of effort for her....she's done it before, she seems to like it, so why the f*ck not. If I don't feel in the mood and one of my ex-gf's has wanted it (even one time I was so tired, I was asleep), I just rolled over and let her have her way with me with her on top.

We already explained all this to you in the other thread, which you clearly learned nothing from, so I won't waste my time.

 

[Jblazingphoenix100]

I think it's that she feels pressured, that sex is "expected" of her. Here's what you need to do.

Make it about her. Her pleasure. Give her soft, sweet kisses, all over her face, eyelids, neck, etc while whispering things to her about how much you love her. As you're doing this, tell her something like "Is it okay if we don't make love? I just want to kiss you right now baby."

Take the pressure off of her and focus all your energy on making sure she is pleasured. Give her oral, kiss her all over, play with her, laugh with her, etc. Ask her about her fantasies... focus on being with her and talking to her more than "approaching her for sex". She doesn't want to be approached for sex. She wants romance.

.

GREAT advice - I would agree with pretty much everything said by Deja.

It sounds like everything you do for her is to get into her knickers.

Everything you should do - well, it should be because you love her and if it does lead to sex, then nice one...but just make her see you're into HER, and that sex isn't the only thing on your mind.

 

[xeros]

you have to be patient with women when it comes to sex. when there ready for it they'll let you know, believe me it's worth waiting for.

 

[hiphophippy]

Be sensual? I don't know a girl that would consent from kissing. My general process is initiate cuddling. This first step is vital, because you need to not be a dick and cuddle with her more then when you just want sex.
step two place your palms on the soft spot between where the legs join the torso. This typically stimulates a calming and bonding factor which will make her more apt to want to connect with you.
every now and again casually breath on her neck. if you're doing it right you should know. Eventually make your move. begin the nest step lightly run your tongue up her ear, nibble it. If she initially objects because she thinks its weird assure her it will feel good, then try agian. If she initially objects because she is not in the mood tuck your dick between your legs and deal with it, that is stop. Next step is hands, bring one hand from the sub tummy position to the opposite side of the neck like a hug and applying as little pressure as possible run your hands over her shoulder and neck. across her collar bones. and continue ear stimulation. if she turns her head to you for kisses do so. if this happens you can typically skip ahead a bit if not. once you feel the sexual tension building, slide your hand down her chest in the same sensuous manner as before rub the area around the breast for a moment before moving into nipple stimulation. eventually if you're any good at being sensuous you'll get to a point where she will have her eyes closed, moving her head ect. enjoying your touch and focusing on it.

remove the shirt and any other garments on her chest, get her on her back and stimulate her nipples, kiss across her chest. once that has gone its course kiss down her chest to her waist and slowly remover pants, when you tug em off run your hands down her thighs then run them back up. tease her, get her excited for you to go down on her by kissing her inner thighs rubbing your hands underneath the top of her knee and along the back of her thigh. Then slide them panties off. and go down on her. If you don't want to go down on her, you don't deserve sex and shouldn't employ this guide.

eventually she may decide to let you get with it. if not get her off.


the most important pieces of this guide are
1 be interested in HER, if you're not genuinely more interested in her pleasure more than your own then A. she will know B. becasue of that it will not work.
2 you should go down on her, not only will this more apt to perform well later, but if you're seriously more concerned about yourself you're a dick and should jump of a cliff.
3 if it doesn't work it doesn't work she may so no, in which case you need to accept that.
4 if you don't like being non-sexually driven sensual, cuddling regularly, massaging her for no reason ect. then this guide/sex/women is not right for you.

 

[LesGo]

I agree with this comment don't make it feel like a chore,ROMANCE HER»»»

I think it's that she feels pressured, that sex is "expected" of her. Here's what you need to do.

Make it about her. Her pleasure. Give her soft, sweet kisses, all over her face, eyelids, neck, etc while whispering things to her about how much you love her. As you're doing this, tell her something like "Is it okay if we don't make love? I just want to kiss you right now baby."

Take the pressure off of her and focus all your energy on making sure she is pleasured. Give her oral, kiss her all over, play with her, laugh with her, etc. Ask her about her fantasies... focus on being with her and talking to her more than "approaching her for sex". She doesn't want to be approached for sex. She wants romance.

That's my guess anyway. If it isn't that, maybe there is something deeper going on with her which would explain why she doesn't want sex. I just know for myself, if sex becomes a chore that is expected of me, I'm no longer aroused by it. Gotta light that romantic fire and live in the moment with your girl.

 

[RAZEONE]

Be sensual? I don't know a girl that would consent from kissing. My general process is initiate cuddling. This first step is vital, because you need to not be a dick and cuddle with her more then when you just want sex.
step two place your palms on the soft spot between where the legs join the torso. This typically stimulates a calming and bonding factor which will make her more apt to want to connect with you.
every now and again casually breath on her neck. if you're doing it right you should know. Eventually make your move. begin the nest step lightly run your tongue up her ear, nibble it. If she initially objects because she thinks its weird assure her it will feel good, then try agian. If she initially objects because she is not in the mood tuck your dick between your legs and deal with it, that is stop. Next step is hands, bring one hand from the sub tummy position to the opposite side of the neck like a hug and applying as little pressure as possible run your hands over her shoulder and neck. across her collar bones. and continue ear stimulation. if she turns her head to you for kisses do so. if this happens you can typically skip ahead a bit if not. once you feel the sexual tension building, slide your hand down her chest in the same sensuous manner as before rub the area around the breast for a moment before moving into nipple stimulation. eventually if you're any good at being sensuous you'll get to a point where she will have her eyes closed, moving her head ect. enjoying your touch and focusing on it.

remove the shirt and any other garments on her chest, get her on her back and stimulate her nipples, kiss across her chest. once that has gone its course kiss down her chest to her waist and slowly remover pants, when you tug em off run your hands down her thighs then run them back up. tease her, get her excited for you to go down on her by kissing her inner thighs rubbing your hands underneath the top of her knee and along the back of her thigh. Then slide them panties off. and go down on her. If you don't want to go down on her, you don't deserve sex and shouldn't employ this guide.

eventually she may decide to let you get with it. if not get her off.


the most important pieces of this guide are
1 be interested in HER, if you're not genuinely more interested in her pleasure more than your own then A. she will know B. becasue of that it will not work.
2 you should go down on her, not only will this more apt to perform well later, but if you're seriously more concerned about yourself you're a dick and should jump of a cliff.
3 if it doesn't work it doesn't work she may so no, in which case you need to accept that.
4 if you don't like being non-sexually driven sensual, cuddling regularly, massaging her for no reason ect. then this guide/sex/women is not right for you.

I like the advice and everything (I employ similar tactics) but if I had to go to these lengths EVERY time I wanted my GF to let me inside her than it would almost become not worth it to me. You have to put in all the desperate work to MAYBE get some action. Obviously if she doesn't want sex she doesn't want sex and there's nothing you could do about it but man, if my girlfriend was like that I'd be looking for a new one.

Also you say if you're more concerned with yourself "you're a dick and should jump of a cliff". That is ridiculous. In this scenario you could equally say that the woman is much more concerned with herself than her partners satisfaction, she demands so many prerequisites for sex. How come she's not a dick?